Yeah these are autistic traits. I am a sociologist and not a doctor of any sort (yet), so keep in mind that my opinion is going to be from the perspective that autistic people are a minority class with special physical, social, mental, emotional characteristics.
You don't need to be able to imagine yourself as someone else to regulate your behavior. That's what most of us in society do, but there are many ways to do anything. You can keep a mental list, or an actual list of what you are supposed to do and not supposed to do and in what circumstance. For example, if a person tells a joke and you don't find it funny, you can smile and say "good one." If your mom tells you that you should be doing something that you don't understand-let's say help clean the kitchen-you can ask, "Please tell me how often I should clean the kitchen and what tasks are included in cleaning the kitchen and I will be happy to do it." If this request is ignored, say, "I need this information so that I can do it right. I'm just trying to help." A good standby is "I'm sorry. I don't understand." Or as a friend of mine says "Can you say it again using different words?"
You can write out literal scripts for yourself in recurring situations. It will make things easier for you.
The eye contact, touching, humming, etc causing pain. These are serious issues that you need to make clear to the neurotypicals in your life so that they will respect your space. They can't know unless you tell them. If they don't accept it, keep telling them. Ear plugs help with the loud noises. Step away from people when they get in your personal space. Ask people to stop humming because your ears are very sensitive. Be vigilant about this. There are tricks on here about looking at people's eyes. I don't know what works better, looking at a forehead or a nose or what, but you don't have to look in people's eyes if you don't want to.
The finger thing is stimming. That's a soothing behavior that will help you reduce stress. My husband is a knife collector and he likes to flip his knives open and shut for a hour or so when he gets home from work. There are lots of ways to stim, some, like my husband and his knife flipping, don't even look like stimming.
The fixed interests thing is another autism trait, but another positive one. The joy that seems to come from jumping into a special interest wholeheartedly is not something us neurotypicals can do. Interests that stay with autistic people can turn into successful careers.
What you said about abstract thought is exciting to me (I have a side interest in abstract thought). Most people seem to think in a combination of pictures and words. Some people have thoughts that are textures, smells-I haven't heard movement before but that would fit in here too- these are abstract thoughts. If anyone gave you an IQ test, you would be more likely to test very high or very low. You'll get this because you said English is your third language- if you think abstractly, it's like having a native language that only you speak, and not everything translates into what you say to other people.
I think you should be excited at these developments. You're a young person. The world is your oyster. You have a few years until you're out on your own, so you can figure out what all this means to you and what you want to do with your life.
Sorry for the long reply.
29 Jul 2015, 8:25 am
