Do you think that you should be classified as NOT autistic?

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For my mentality classyfing me as not autistic would be unjust mockery. I may feel temptations to harm a person who would classify me as a non-autistic person. It may look like ignoring my problems. I am very "odd", have poor social skills so I can be named as "idiot" even by my sister who is above 9 years younger than me. I do not feel need of being loved (also by parents), my mentality do not feel interest in "normal" socialisation. I have "fixated" interest and my mind likes "one-sided interactions" more than being alone ("estroverted autism", which can be more annoying to others and can look (more) silly). I like simple, "repetitive" jobs like fruit picking, handwriting, collecting, statistics, maps. I do not like haircutting (feeling of small hairs on skin - can be really unpleasant), hairdo making, washing of body (due to contact with water which often is so cold or so hot), having injections, uncomfortable clothes, I have rather narrow menu. I can sometimes stim "wildly" (motorically and vocally), which can look for "typical" people as something associated with being handicapped. My otherness started in childhood, well before adolescence. I have diagnoses of a pervasive developmental disorder (and also of schizotypal disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder).

But I suppose that in Northern America I would be not classified as "autistic". Descriptions of so-called "nonverbal learning disorder" appears to fit me more than descriptions of Kanner's syndrome and "bookish" form of AS, which is for me VERY similar to childhood autism (Kanner's syndrome). I suppose that something which I have, which should be called as a sort of autism, is not related to Kanner's syndrome. Descriptions of "NLD" can be irritating for me, some of them are "clearly silly" for me because I would call a person who has such a "NLD" as an Aspie or maybe even autistic. I think that there are other sorts of developmental disorders which should be named as "autism" than Kanner's syndrome and conditions obviously similar or related to it, such as "bookish" Asperger's.

I do not consider myself Autistic in the least. OK I may not be so good at making friends (I can't seem to form close enough friendships with people), but I can recognise and understand body language and other non-verbal cues - from instinct. People can recognise how I'm feeling through my body language too. Also I'm very good with expressing my feelings, in fact I do so more than my NT boyfriend does. He says I'm a very loving, understanding, loyal girl who opens up about my feelings. I am not distant or aloof. I always love to be cuddled, whatever mood I'm in. Apparently I am far from logical too, often people say I'm irrational and emotionally-orientated. And I am not, like, 100% honest. I am honest enough, because I don't want to turn out to be a liar in my relationship with my partner. But I can and will tell white lies, and he probably has told white lies to me too. Usually I use white lies to avoid awkwardness, to save someone else's feelings, and to get me out of doing something (obviously not something too big and important where I need to create a bull story, but just something quite simple what can be avoided just by telling a white lie what is not too obvious). I just instinctively know how people use white lies, and I use them too. Also I find it hard to focus on my interests. I'm really into story-writing at the moment, but it's taking me a long time to write my current story because I just can't be bothered. So I keep coming back to it, hoping I don't lose interest and start writing another one.

I feel more like an eccentric person with ADD problems and social anxiety, with a few traits of ASD but not actually an Aspie or Autistic. And that is the real truth, it's not denial. I really mean it. I really don't see any use of my ASD diagnosis. I don't know how I got diagnosed with ASD as a kid, because I didn't even display that much ASD symptoms as a kid. I could engage in pretend play with other children, I had an imagination, I didn't line toys up, I didn't have any special interests, I didn't have meltdowns at crowds or loud noises, I struggled with maths and science and technology, the lessons I did enjoy I still struggled with, and I made normal eye contact from birth and developed typically in every aspect (socially, intellectually and physically).

I only got this diagnosis because of how I behaved on my first day of school. My parents and the teachers were so shocked and surprised at my sudden behaviour, that I suppose I got focused on ever since, and the doctors decided to slap a diagnosis of ASD on me, just because I was shy as a kid and had anxiety issues.

No. I don't think the average NT seven-year-old likes reading her mom's grammar books and parenting magazines. Or walks around the playground at recess, flapping her hands and ignoring everyone else. I don't think that most NTs have meltdowns, complete with screaming, crying, and hitting themselves, at things that don't bother anyone else in the slightest. Or that anything other than autism can describe my lack of ability to make close friends and connect with people.

Like you, Joe90, I don't have all traits of autism. I can often understand body language, and can be VERY illogical and emotional. But I still consider myself autistic because it's the best way to explain my difficulties.

I do not have severe sensory issues, prosopagnosia, dominance of visual thinking, tendency to meltdowns, very bad theory of mind and very bad central coherence. I can not name my condition as similar to Kanner's syndrome, but it does not mean that I should not be named as autistic. I think that there is more than one sort of "autistic spectrum". I do not belong to "typical" one. Psychiatrist marked that I need help in home-making, have "incapability of independent existence" and I have "serious prognosis". I am not interested in "normal" life, have obsessions ("positive" ("Aspergian" interests) and "negative" (OCD)), can look as a intellectually disabled person in some way despite good ability to learning in school.

I have autism & am still upset that the person doing the testing said I communicated too well verbally & seemed too intelligent to have anything on the autism spectrum & that I have Aspergers but it's not due to autism.

I don't consider myself autistic or NT. I have some autistic traits like special interests and sensory issues when I'm sick. When I'm feeling healthy I don't have any sensory issues.

If I'm dealing with sensory issues I often have to avoid people and emotionally distance myself. When I emotionally distance myself from people I miss social cues. I also have to stim.

My special interests make talking to people difficult. Mainly because I can tell they're not engaged, but it's nearly impossible to talk about anything else. This makes my interactions one sided.

I strongly prefer back and forth conversations. They're actually energizing. They make me feel alive and NT.

I also get Pure-O obsessions. They're hell, but they don't interfere with my social skills as much.

I didn't mind being labelled "weird", "strange" or "difficult" when I was young, I could wear those as badges of honor back then, I wanted to be recognised as being different because I knew that I was different. But going into middle-age such labels have very different connotations, so I'm happier now with ASD or my formal diagnosis of Aspergers.

They are just words though. Until ASD is proved otherwise as an actual thing with a common origin, I'll go on believing that my particular problem is due to birth trauma knocking out my gross motor skills, and to compensate for that deficiency my brain has developed heightened sensitivities to noise, light, texture, the threat from strangers etc. in order to balance the disadvantage of not being able to swim, climb, run very well and all of the physical things I'd need to be able to do as a hunter/gatherer, which is what I'm biologically designed to be.

Unfortunately we now live in a completely unnatural environment with an emphasis on increasingly exaggerated stimuli that distracts people from the fact that they're stuck in this 'human zoo', so those compensations that my brain has developed have instead become an even greater hindrance to me than my lack of gross motor skills. Instead of being attuned to subtle changes in the environment, I'm overloaded with full-on 24/7 chaos. All I can do to survive, day to day, is to withdraw from the world into the corner of my proverbial cage in the zoo and depend on the pity of others to throw me some scraps.

I want myself classified however it needs to be to receive help, I think it is a significant disability at least for myself. People take autism seriously, we're all on the spectrum and Aspergers is more embarrassing to say. I don't really care about people perceptions being warped or outdated.

I think it's easy to doubt yourself and your problems, to question whether or not you deserve help and if you're just a crybaby weakling but there is no point beating yourself or having shame in getting assistance when that's what you truly need. The alternative is sitting and wallowing, rotting. My life isn't normal, I'm not like other people but I like to think my life is still worth living.