Had a meltdown at work this morning

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I'm a cleaner at a care home and lately we're very short on cleaners, which means more pressure on us. I've been working all weekend to help out, so I am exhausted. And this morning I came in and was told that we are short-staffed again. Also I was told that some of the patients have had an upset stomach, which is even more work.

This caused me a stress overload. I yelled that I was going home, and my supervisor had to block the door so I wouldn't run out. Then I shouted at the top of my voice, which I've never done at work before. And then I put my head in my hands and burst into tears, so my supervisor comforted me, which calmed me down again. She said she will be there to help if I need it.

I do feel embarrassed now. People will think I have an anger problem, but although looks like anger to others, it's not actually anger I'm feeling, it's just panic on the spur of the moment.

You were stressed so you had to release it. However, accept that what you did is done and is in the past. Never do it again. I am sorry you felt overwhelmed.

I can't imagine anyone not realizing you had just been pushed beyond your limits that day. Like you said, raising your voice isn't common for you.

Good for you for expressing yourself! And you got good results. Perhaps your supervisor can be an ally.

Sorry you went through that. I can relate to your frustration.

Where I come from your behavior would be viewed simply as "venting" frustration as opposed to something bigger.

It's a pity it had to come to that. Still, try not to feel too embarrassed about it. Employers do tend to shove their staff into harder and harder situations, and until somebody turns awkward, they aren't likely to back off. Hopefully they'll think twice about it and back off the pressure in future.

Thank you for the replies.

I just feel embarrassed because I try to imagine other people acting like that at work but I can't see them doing that. Also it makes me feel worried in case I'll have to work full time at some point. I get too stressed when under too much pressure too many days on the trot, but I am not entitled any disability benefits. Where I come from, if you can walk, talk, read, write, and make decisions for yourself, which I can do all of those, then you are not disabled. Point taken, but emotional issues can affect you just like any disability can.

Next time that you have to work all weekend take an hours or two just to relax, it works wonders and really helps.

That's the problem. The UK social security system doesn't view ASD as a disability, unless you're lucky enough to have a piece of paper from a health professional of high enough standing that specifies exactly how your social difficulties impact on your ability to work in a real-life job. A diagnosis of ASD on its own is virtually ignored, in spite of overwhelming scientific evidence that our social and executive function impairments are very real.

It's no so much how high-up the tree the Dr is, it's more about what they write about you - i.e. in the big inner cities, the Drs will happily write letters to get your DSS benefits no problem, and know how to word the letters and fill in the forms... In Ruralshire, they don't and they have loads of these silly schemes: http://www.kent.gov.uk/jobs/helping-dis ... -into-work and all they do is push people into work even if they can't really cope.

All I meant by "of sufficient standing" was that the qualifications and job description have to be right. When you say "what they write about you," that's essentially the same as when I said "specifies exactly how your social difficulties impact on your ability to work in a real-life job." So no argument from me about that.

I was involved in one case where the diagnostician specified the client's difficulties pretty well, but potentially spoiled it by including something like "can do it when she tries." I suggested that sentence should be removed, and to my delight, it was. So yes, it's not just a matter of specifying how the impairments make things impossible, it's also about consistency, or the case can be weakened.

It's even better if the doc will help directly with the benefit forms etc. I'm starting to wonder whether the reluctance to diagnose adults with autism is something to do with the fact that a child's diagnosis isn't likely to contain much detail about what will happen in the world of work.

I've seen the same problem in the US as you mention for the UK - if you live in the country, you might find you need to travel a long way to get help from somebody who won't confine their services to "helping you into work" (euphemism for ignoring your disability).

Next time you feel like exploding in front of people, quickly retreat to an inconspicuous place, grap a cup and scream into it. When the meltdown is over, go back to your business.

Absolutely. With government cuts a lot of these lefty groups and day centres we could previously attend are largely given the chop. Moreover, it's cheaper to stick them into a repetative loop of employment.

On the ESA forms there is a section for us to name the Dr we last saw and they'll get written to. For the majority of my life I have lived in the London Boroughs of Bexley, Greenwich and Croydon, so have had no problems in acuqiring my concessions. A lot of them in Ruralshire have serious difficulty in getting stuff like free bus passes, their exemption on Council Tax because we're - I note you're of a certain age - so you'll know what I mean by 'a bit Joey', and everything is a struggle. The whole thing is a postcode lottery. In Ruralshire, an awfully high proportion of them are sent straight to KSE or their county's equivalent straight after diagnosis...

When I saw a clinician in one of the above Boroughs, he said "describe your schooling" "bright group for everything except Maths" "Then you're educationally-challenged". IE they sent in to the DSS that sort of thing, and I was OK. Poor old Joe 90 will not get any leg-ups in the East of England, and if she did leave her job would get bunged on JSA... And nothing like this: http://www.oxleas.nhs.uk/services/servi ... ce-servic/

I have had countless meltdowns at work. Some worse then others. One time I made the mistake of sending an email to my boss when I was overwhelmed and told him I was going to quit. I was almost fired and was written up and made to get help for anger issues. Other times my meltdowns were viewed as making me unapproachable and in my position others need to come to me when they need help with something. I will be laid off from my job in December and fear not being able to find an employer that will be as tolerant with my meltdowns. The company I work for now has put up with me for 15 yrs.