Meltdowns?

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So I was reading up on shutdowns and meltdowns and started to think back on some of my past experiences with times in my life that seemed to be one or the other but I'm not sure.
In the past I have had moments where I feel like a switch has been flipped and depending on the emotional trigger, I may start seeing red. During these times I can't think coherently and it takes a lot of control that I almost don't posses to not react violently or start shouting at the person who happened to be the catalyst to this. I can't think, I can't breathe, I just want to scream and cry. To everyone it looks like I'm just standing there for a minuteor so until I can get myself back under control to function. This is usually what happens when I'm in public but it has happened a couple times at home. I will usually drag something sharp enough to hurt but not sharp enough to cut to try and ease the rage since that anger needs to go somewhere and outbursts would get me in trouble growing up. This usually happens when I'm cornered or can't get away to calm down.
Other times when I've been pushed past my point I feel like everything's shutdown and I wander or just sit somewhere in a daze torn between my rage and sadness. I feel like I'm balacing on a razors edge and the slightest breeze will push me over. During these times I don't care about safety and will do a similar self harm as the rage cutting but it's to make the emptiness go away. This one usually happens at home after something incredibly stressful.
Just for the record, neither incident has happened in well over a year

Did you have an anger outburst that was obvious to others in these situations?
If not, then it is not a meltdown.
It seems like getting really angry, but you seem to be able to control your behaviors and not have public outbursts that could damage your relationships with others.
The main problem that I can see with these episodes is if they happen really often, but you said they haven't happened in a year.
If you find these to be a big problem in your life, it might be helpful to look into emotional regulation, in your case perhaps trying to not get really angry from triggers, it is possible to regulate yourself to be more zen about triggers, you may find that you don't get angry over things that you used to get angry over.

I don't know if it's noticeable to any one because I've never asked and no one says anything. It usually happens at work and there's always something more important to do. There was one public outburst that caused my sister and I not to speak for 6mos. I've gotten to the point where I recognize it coming and get out of the situation immediately

Actually, I would say that any burst of anger that is debilitating, be it obvious to others or not, would be a meltdown. We are conditioned to not express these things publicly, so we are mostly inhibited from doing so. Your getting out of a situation that you know will cause a meltdown could be considered a shutdown of sorts, I suppose. These are tricky things to put a handle on.

There was only once where I couldn't get away and it ended with a fist fight with a family member.
These episodes are so rare because I only really leave the house to work, eat (quiet restaurant with headphones in), and run errands so I'm only subjected to situations where I feel this extremely rarely (December stands a higher chance of getting them).
Thinking back, a coworker noticed I was having trouble when I started tearing paper into perfect strips.

From what I´ve read, it does look like a perfect example of a meltdown - one that is being controlled.

From what I´ve read about meltdowns, it does look like a perfect example of one - one that is being controlled.