Are People Laughing at Me?

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Hey everyone,

How's it going?

I've just got a quick question that I would like to pose to you all.
I wrote on a post the other day about Sheldon in the Big Bang Theory tv show. He has a favourite chair, works hard with no belief in hanging out with too many people etc.
Now, I work in aerodynamics research and spend close to 14 hours a day in the university wind tunnel or in my office.

Do you ever get the feeling that people are laughing AT you behind your back at your 'idionsynchratic' mannerisms? I've noticed it a bit more recently and it's starting to get a bit unnerving. I mean, if you find me funny then GO AWAY and laugh someplace else - don't hang out in my office and make fun of me!

Anyway, just would like to hear your input
af_1

I think they were doing more eye-rolling and sniping behind my back than laughing. To this day I think I was the sacrificial goat they kept in reserve for throwing under the proverbial bus when they felt their positions were threatened (if I may mix metaphors). Maybe it's ultimately the same thing.

I was nearing the end of a thirty+ year career when someone close to me finally took me aside and told me what was being said about me when I left the room. There's the Aspergian naivete for you - I'd been so wrapped up in the work all that time, it never occurred to me that my coworkers thought I was strange. I mean, I knew I was a tad askew from the crowd, but I never thought it was enough to mark me as some aberrant mutation. Boy, was I off the mark. The only people who accepted me all that time, were others like me, who were considered social mutations. The NTs weren't openly hostile to us, they just treated us as a different tribe. Much like High School, actually.

I don't really notice.

Possibly. And if they are in your office, you have every right to tell them to go laugh elsewhere. Tell them it's distracting but don't let them know that it upsets you or it'll get worse!

af_1,

As usual, Willard has a great response. Also, keep in mind though, that they may not be laughing at you at all, or at least not MOST of the time.

I had the same problem with people laughing or snarking, until I realized that no one was going to really tell me anything definitive about what was going on, so I just stopped caring about it. I realized that if I let it bother me, then I'll only appear paranoid, which is worse than just being odd.

If they ARE laughing at me, then it doesn't really matter; I wasn't planning on making friends with anyone of that ilk anyway.

I just smile. Most people are kind of stuck in High school socially.

All the time back in school.

Thanks for those responses guys.

I'll give an example of the kind of stuff that goes on.
My office backs onto a common area where there is a coffee machine and some couches to relax on during the day. One of the computer programmers who works near me was commenting that he was sick of hving no free cash to spend on a car (being a postgrad there isn't TOO much money going around!) and I suggested that since he's got so much spare time in the evenings he should get another job. It's not like he stays at the office past 5:30 any day and he's not in until 8:30 so he COULD get another job. . . . .
Is that seen as a joke to most people? He posed the situation where he wants money and has some free time and I suggest he gets another job.

People just seem funny sometimes. . . .

Naw... I think people just like to sit there and whine and then not even do anything about it. That is a very typical person-thing and why I like to call them sheeple, because sheep are pretty helpless.

"Do you ever get the feeling that people are laughing AT you behind your back at your 'idionsynchratic' mannerisms?"

Yeah, I have an unusual gait on the running machine and because of past damage to my nose I have to breath through my mouth. Couple this with mild paranoia and each time I hear the girls on gym reception laughing I'm never sure of the source of their amusement.

Vanilla_Slice

Happens all the time, or else groups go quiet in the breakroom at work when they see me. I figure part of the time it's my paranoia, but a good part of the time it's clear they think I'm weird. especially when I fall over my own feet. They enjoy that with gusto.

In school they did.

I don't think anyone laughs at me, but I keep thinking they do. I've been told it's just my imagination (my imagination does run away with me sometimes, and when my imagination fires false thoughts at me, it's hard for me to ignore the thoughts).

Sometimes when I walk past teenage girls, they always collaspe into giggles as they pass me, which makes me look round at them because I wonder why they have to giggle loud when passing me. I try telling myself that they were probably giggling at eachother, but I still get paranoid.

I don't see why people should laugh at me - I go out looking presentable, and I walk up straight, and I don't stim, or do anything else to make myself stand out, and I don't know about how my face is when I'm out, but surely that can't make people laugh. I see loads of people with a grumpy-fied look on their face anyway, and it's not anything to laugh about.

I've embraced the vast majority of my quirks and most of the people I know will discuss them jokingly in front of me. If they want to laugh about them after I've gone, thats their thing.

As a side note, I don't think Sheldon's acquaintances are really laughing at him behind his back per se. Much of what they say about him is said whether he's present or not. They just get away with saying more than most people would be comfortable with because Sheldon doesn't let it phase him.

Don't worry about people laughing at you.

If people want to laugh at me, they can. It's a free world. It doesn't bother me, and it's not going to cramp my style.