Body Language

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AS and more broadly, autism can cause impairments in "normal" receptive and expressive body language. So, I was just wondering, how well is everybody here is with receptive and expressive body language?

As for me, my expressive body language is worse than my receptive. I have had a voice that lacked tempo and tone and other things since childhood, and the only thing that adjusted well to my feelings was the volume- it'd be louder when I was frustrated. The gestures that I use are mostly "hand signs" such as good luck and rude ones lol... I know about almost every one of them because I find hands to be intrigung. I also use gestures for pointing at direction when giving addresses because I find it to be hard verbally. But other than those, I don't use any gestures, like NTs do when they communicate. It's hard for me to have certain facial expressions while others come to me easily. I really don't HATE eye contact, but most of the time I find myself staring at my hands or an object in the background.

My receptive body language is quite better than my expressive, however still sort of lacking. The only thing I'm "normal" at is guessing people's emotions based on the properties of their voice; however I can't determine if they're lying or telling the truth that way or by "looking at their eyes" as some people claim they can. I'm really bad with facial expressions- I sometimes mix similar ones such as happiness and anger, and it's hard for me to differentiate between things such as, for example, anger and rage. I know that rage is supposed to be a more intense form of anger, but if I look at someone's face, I can't determine whether they're more likely to shout at me, hit me or kill me.

How about everybody else?

With me, I CAN emphasize, etc... OBVIOUSLY(That is why I write these words in caps)! And, obviously, I am a little different, as I try to convey meaning through emphasis even on BBSs(aka Forums).

As for hand gestures, I started doing this stupid thing sometimes like 15 years ago. I don't think it is recieved too well, but it gives me something to do with my hands.

For my eyes, I remember that I NEVER looked anywhere based solely on another persons actions. That INCLUDED their talking to me. Today, I look because through school, and by my parents, I was berated for NOT doing it!

As for OTHERs emphasis? I often pick up on it. OTHERs hand gestures? I generally IGNORE! OTHERs eyes? I usually don't see.

Facial expressions, in either case are a toss up.

Steve

when i lived w/ my dad and step-mum, she pretended to know me better than i knew myself. i remember she would suspect me of lying, look in my eyes, and be like "he's lying"... i did not lie. i dont lie.
when i was confronted about smoking marijuana by the vice principle of my school, i did not lie. i simply do not lie.

For me, I too can notice differences in voice reflection and most general expressions but can't tell either if people are lying or misleading and don't either pay attention to the gestures. I believe everything and take everything literal. I also have variations in my voice especially if excited but other times am still flat, monotone and often my speech comes accross kinda choppy since I feel I have to continually think about trying to put the words together. I don't use many hand gestures. I love to dance and my feet will bust-a-move but always feel awkward with my arms not knowing what to do with them. And I don't usually look people in the eye unless I can conciously remind myself to.

I understand completely about people thinking you're lying. I've contintually had the prob my whole life many times with many people as they mistake your awkwardness and lack of eye contact for dishonesty. Very frustrating indeed!

I know my expressive body language is horrible because I have a strange posture, sort of slumped over like an old person when I sit and tilted to one side when standing. I carry myself this way due to weak muscles and odd sensory perception, but people take it for being shy or lacking confidence, or lying.

I think NTs sort of feel like they exist throughout their whole body, whereas I feel more like I exist only in my head and my body is a set of appendages or tools to express what's in my head. Therefore I'm prone to ignore it when I'm not actively using it.

What a nice way of explaining it all. I'm the same way. I only HOPE I really don't have the tilted stand problem. I try to corect for that, and always wonder if I did so correctly!
Oddly, I don't have that sensation all the time though.

Steve

I have learned to be more appropriately expressive with voice and body language. This involved practicing with tape recorders and video cameras. My voice used to be weirdly inflected and my movements twitchy.

I also learned to read obvious body language by taking my sketch pad into bars and drawing people. I have a few pads full of pictures of people talking to each other, dancing, drinking, etc. By drawing people, I became aware of how they sit and stand while interacting.

I cannot read body language, but I can "feel" a persons energy if I pay attention, if they are uncomfortable or angry or what have you.

I've studied body language so I can decode if I can remember to concentrate on that. There is a language of the eyes that I don't get at all with most people. I can read my husband's eyes most of the time. "Lying eyes" and such with strangers escapes me. I can logically work out the probability of someone lying to me based on their words.

That's interesting how you explained it figuring it out based on probability. That's a perfect way to describe it. I've just started figuring that out in the last year or so but didn't know quite how to explain it. Prior to figuring this out, I always believed everything everyone said and was continually confused when i'd respond or act on that only to end up with disastrous results. I believed everything and am still very naive and trusting which in turn makes me very easy to take advantage of. Though now that I've figured out it somewhat by examining what they say more, I can reduce the chances but still find myself very easily swayed and have to be careful.

Friends used to say that if a naked girl came up to me trying to get my attention, Id probably ask "Arent you cold. Would you like my jacket?" while scratching my head wondering why she would do something like that. Does that answer the question.

I'm quite unable to get what people mean when they for example sit inside a car and you also sit inside a car and then they gesticulate wildly around with their hands in order to tell you something. Does this also fall under the category of lack of understanding of body language at all?
I've also been told that I don't have very good facial expression. It's not like I don't have it at all, it's just not very expressive (and I don't expect other people's to be very expressive either, I was surprised for example to learn that lots of people think that Keanu Reeves lacks facial expression when acting, I thought it was just fine, quite like mine, not very expressive, but it's there after all). But I guess the Aspie kind lack of facial expression really means none at all, doesn't it?

I tend to put all of my weight on one leg... I don't know if it makes me look tilted, but it makes me prone to waving my hands for balance.



When I was 7, me and the neighbour's daughter were riding our bikes when my cousin came and asked us if we had taken something. Both of us said no and he told us to look into his eyes so we did... he said I'm not lying, but he said my friend was. Later it turned out that she indeed had stolen the thing... I stared at people's eyes for a while after that but I never figured out how you could determine if they were lying or telling the truth.

Eye contact as a lie indication is urban myth. Lots of liars can do it.

It's true, especially since a lot of people learn that at an early age. And psychopaths can do it without falter.

I am much better understanding other people's body language (I guess) because I have made an attempt to learn about it. However it is much harder for me to "fit in" and it seems like I have to pay attention to that and keep making corrections when I am out in public. I tend to have an odd stance or posture or I will do things when I focus on something intently that probably look weird - sort of like stimming I guess. And like so many others here have mentioned before - people think I am angry or unhappy or always asking me what is wrong because of my expression. So it takes effort not only to understand other people due to sensory issues and processing delays - but also to focus on giving off the right or appropriate body language (smiling, looking at the other person thoughtfully, ect.). I also used to have a very high pitched sing-songy voice but I made efforts to adjust that.