Why do people ask you "what's up?"

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or "how are you?" and some just say 'hello' or good morning' or 'good afternoon' or 'good evening' depending on time of day.

At work guests and other employees say those to me and I just respond back by saying the same thing. With "How you're doing?" I just say 'good' and not say anything. I find it irritating but I respond anyway because I don't want to be rude. And I cannot stand not answering someone when they're talking to me because it makes me feel bad inside.

With “what’s up?” I have to come up with a random answer quick. I say “working” or “nothing.”



I wonder why they do this.

I think it's a learned behavior. People say it because everyone else says it.

I understand the phrase "What's up" to mean "What's wrong". But that's British usage.

Is it what's up or is it just 'sup? If it's just 'sup I've found that you can respond with 'sup.

It's a ritual greeting and nothing more. It roughly translates into "I'm not hostile." You are obliged to return the "sup" or whatever response appropriate to the greeting. It has nothing personally to do with you and you shouldn't take it as such.

What's up? H'm. When I worked as a waitress, I would have thought that would be a question to ask the cook, so he could go, "Number two - up! Yeah, it is a pretty inane greeting.

Dig this man. Ya kno how we aspie types live in realms of rich conceptual complexity? Like er have vast vocabularies to express our inner visions to amy and all who wanna hear, ya kno?

Well, get this, I mean this'll make ya think real groovy deep. . .The people we call NTs don't have our conceptual depth, man,

But they Re not just shallow. They have a depth of wild and deep emotion. Now I hear what you're thinkin' there man, that is soooo illogical. But hip yourself to this man, it is not illogical ya kno in the sense og logic failed or poorly applied. . .

That entee emotion space, I mean try to wrap your mind around this concept, is nonlogical. Logic simply does not apply there at all. There is so often, and I kno you will have some trouble with this concept, but just let me go a few more moments folks, there is so often no logical purpose to the entees actions.

Are you digging my gist? Most entee life is like sort of, man dig this - a big dance. They are dancing. They don't dance to get anywhere. They dance to dance. I mean ain't that wild? Gotta be hep to entee ways chillins.

I'm going to disagree with a lot of of the answers (except for nutbag's). "what's up?" "How are you?" "what's going on?" can mean a lot of different stuff for different people.
It can be a straightforward greeting, to be answered "Hey" "Not much" "going good" "How are you?"

It can be inquiring if there is gossip about you being sick, unhappy, unwell or in trouble. This is answered with, "I'm doing alright" "Today is good" "I've been better" "okay"

It can be personal, if someone thinks you're snubbing them to be answered with a very brief description of your activities, "too much work!" "sorry I haven't called" "long time no see" "what isn't going on!?"

My very NT friend got mad when she was visibly upset but otherwise just walking down the street and an acquaintance smiled and said, "How's it going?" She just flipped. However, he wasn't in any position to stop and ask her why she was crying or to hug her or anything. He was just a distant friend who has his own neurosis to deal with and control.

I was listening to NPR today and there was a man living with cancer on. He explained that he keeps a varied selection of answers to "how are you?" and answers according to who is asking and where they are.

i think it's completely illogical also. I mean, i get it, but always still want to respond to these literally.

ie. how's it going? followed by my 10 minute explatation of how it really HAS been going followed by the other person looking at me as a nutcase as they really didn't want to know..

again - back to being illogical: if you don't want to know, don't ask.. hahaha

If you don't play the social game, people will think you are a jerk. People really don't want to know how you are when these encounters take place at work with people you don't know well. It is simply a nicety, dogs sniffing butts, so to speak. Temple Grandin calls it a "courtesy rule."

It is a lot easier just to go along with social rules like this.

I like to respond with "The Ceiling". Sometimes it's fun to buck the system.

Here's what I respond with to those questions:

How are you?
Terrible
Terrible? why
[lengthy discussion of why im feeling terrible]

Whats up?
[looking upwards]clouds; sky; rain; cirro cumulus; ceiling; space; etc ad infinitum
[depending on the environment]

Whats happening; Whats going on?
I'm talking with someone that just asked me what I'm doing
The earth is spinning one thousand miles per hour on its axis while orbiting the sun at a rate of 45,000 miles per hour (or any other made up number that sounds plausible) While the entire solar system is orbiting the galactic center at over a million miles per hour, meanwhile we are falling several million miles per hour toward the nearby galaxy Andromeda, and our entire cluster is traveling at an unimaginable rate of speed toward something called the Great Attractor, what's happening with you?

this question is just like another common question people ask, So what do you do for a living?

I can handle the questions as greetings but I don't like it when someone you don't or barely know then takes it further and asks, "so what do you?" People (NT and otherwise) are pressured to explain their lofty ambitions really quick. The other night I was invited into a conversation at a restaurant bar and when I got a bit political, this lady said, "so what do you do that you are so smart?!" I glossed over the question because if and when I say "I'm a stay at home mom" or "I'm a nurse aide in a nursing home", I get really, really dumbfounded looks.