How do you feel about people touching your 'stuff'?

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I was trying to describe to an NT in another thread how distressing it feels as an aspie to have other people touch your 'stuff'. I was trying to differentiate between normal household things which we share and the personal things which are special and mine alone. This person thought it was freakish to get upset because touches/uses/tries your stuff. I kind of think it's freakish not to and perfectly normal behaviour for an aspie.

So how do you feel about it?

Most recently, my supervisor--who doesn't normally work in my department--worked a shift in my (very small) retail space. When I came into work, I discovered that she had "tidied things up." I was not a happy camper! I don't consider this just an Aspie issue. I mean, how would she have liked it if I had walked over to her office and, in her absence, rearranged everything?

I asked a question just like this the other day, and I found that a lot of Aspies really can't handle other people touching their belongings. I know that I react very badly to it, especially if they want to pick up my dirty clothes to put them in the laundry or if they're in my room. I can't sit down when someone's in my room and I have to go up and follow them.

I get very, very bothered by it but usually pretend not to care.

i hate it...

but like jonsi i try not to show how much it upsets me....

Our house is a typical aspie house; can't see the furniture for all the books. We have several bookcases in pretty much every room (including the attic and the cellar). Most of them are a higgledy-piggledy-hodge-podge of books, games, dvds and such like. With photos and ornaments and bits and bobs and mountains of dust. Anyone in the house can have a rummage for what interests them. Not a problem.

There is one bookcase in the corner of the dining room which is mine. It has my special books, by my favourite authors, all lined up in military precision, dust and clutter free. I love those books, handle them with great care, and read them over and over again. Seeing them all neatly and orderly presented makes me feel warm and fuzzy.

Why am I a freak for being upset because someone else has had their grubby little mits all over them? Putting them out of order or, heaven forbid, folding down the corners of pages

I feel very uneasy if people touch my stuff. I'd rather that the person gets to know me first, so that I don't feel that they're trying to find clues when they're looking through my stuff.

Ack! No one is allowed to even go near my things, let alone touch them! Especially all my R&C stuff...

I'm huge on sharing (a symptom of my loneliness, no doubt), so it doesn't bother me. If it's something that I'm extremely attached to, I get a bit apprehensive.
However, my CLOTHES are a big no-no.

I don't generally like people touching my stuff, Some people would walk in my room and start messing stuff up, my games consoles, my bed, my clothes, my guitars, my rig etc. I don't generally mind people touching my stuff as long as they ask first...

...With my guitars it's a different story altogether. People often ask me if they can play my guitars, and get annoyed when I say no. Truth is, they have to prove themselves if they want to play my guitars.

Why do people get annoyed if I tell them they can't touch my stuff? It's my stuff and I decide who can and can't touch it at the end of the day.

I'm not a violent person, but messing with my things is one way to provoke an attack. I'm not talking about just any item. I mean my special interest objects. (My gadgets, computers, video game consoles) The last time this happened was about 5 years ago & I punched a hole in my door because I was so upset.


On a lesser level, I get really upset when someone wants to mess with/move my other things....like clothes, books, papers etc etc. (Everything else that's "mine" & not shared) But I tend to hide my upset-ness with these objects.

That's what I meant. There's a difference between stuff and 'stuff'.

It depends on how dirty and germy their hands are, if they have a cold or some other contagion, or if their plan is to destroy it. Then it's strictly hands off.

I can't stand people touching my stuff! You ask me first, and then if I say you can, which isn't likely, then you can, with me there, watching. This has always provoked arguments, with my parents telling me I'm selfish, ungrateful, and a whole lot of other things, some of which are not nice to repeat. The best way to avoid these unpleasant scenes, don't touch my stuff, especially my books, collectibles, movies, dvd player, or tv. I'd probably have a heart attack if I came home and found any of them harmed in any way. The only one who can do such a thing and get away with it is my cat, because I have a soft spot for her, but no one else.