Neurotypical Mask

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Do you 'put on' a mask?

How good are you at putting on the neurotypical mask?

How long did it take you to perfect 'acting normal' in society? Just trying to fit in.

Have you ever failed and stood out as 'different'?

Do you ever just act yourself - throw caution to the wind and just be your natural Aspie self?

I pretty much wing it these days, to the irritation of my wife

She doesn't like it that I'm known as the Wolfman in the supermarket.

I only "put on a mask" when I think the risk of not doing it is great (like in brief outings with people I'm not close to, and I'd have to explain myself otherwise). I've done it for years, and learned that sometimes sucking it up it the way to go. Some things I can't mask like accidentally saying something blunt without catching it before it leaves my mouth, or retracting when someone touches me. I also have resting b***h face which I can't seem to control.

Most of the time I don't care and will completely be myself. Other times, it's not worth enduring people's reactions and opinions. I have failed plenty of times.

I often build up a Fake profile of myself and go from there..

I put on the mask when I'm out of the house, but at home I let myself be myself. I have a spouse who is very accepting (which goes both ways).

I used to when I was really young because I didn't questioned it. Until I did anyway.

I gave it up in a rather early age... (Say, like 8?)

How often or when? As rare as possible. I don't want to live in an act or fear due to how society dictates it. I could be all out autistic, just NEVER that anxietious wreck. I would only do so, out of necesity. But thanks to the cultural loophole I found, that came true.

As for how good I do the act, I couldn't assess that well. Sometimes I did it too well, sometimes I don't. I simply don't put an effort to it.

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I have never been able to put on a neurotypical mask. I have tried many times, but can't think of once that I was actually successful. Its very stressful trying and failing, so I don't even try to put one on anymore.

But what is it with neurotypicals that they can't handle the truth?

That's what my ex-partner used to like about me. If we went shopping and she asked me "How's this hat look on me?" and I said, "Crap!", she appreciated my honesty. At least she knew she'd get an honest answer!

Why is it, people want you to lie and tell them they look good when in actual fact, you both know it looks crap?

This always reminds me of The Emperor's New Clothes! - and I'm the little boy - only in my story, (generally, in my life) I'm ostracize!

I can fake NT for a little while (or at least I think I can; I have no idea how I appear to other people), but that s illusion is blown when I have a meltdown.

^^^ I've never been the sort to have meltdowns. I was always a placid person. Almost to the point of being docile - although I must admit, since getting older, my tolerance levels to peoples' stupidity is getting very thin! I used to suffer fools but I find, as I get older, ... well, you know the rest! (and I couldn't be bothered typing it out. I'm tired! And old!)

I tried the mask, it didn't fit and made me itch. Long time in the bin.