Negative Social Feedback Loop

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I feel I've gotten worse and worse socially over time, becoming more and more withdrawn and socially anxious and awkward due to repeated social failures and embarrassments. It got so bad in high school that i actually became mute as a sort of coping mechanism and simply never communicated to anybody except teachers when necessary. now i'm at the stage where i've been wasting away in solitude for 7 years living on the computer after I stopped attending school and I feel like there's just no possible way to recover. not sure if this post has much of a purpose i just needed to get this off of my chest after i was reminded of how socially ret*d I am when engaging in smalltalk with a dairy cashier and his wife (the only time i leave the house really).
who else has became progressively worse socially after so many occasions where you just sucked at holding a conversation so bad that you just felt like dying?

I've become more withdrawn socially, but not necessarily more anxious. I'm not very good at small talk, never have been and I can feel quite annoyed sometimes by people who insist on imposing it on me. I used to give myself a hard time over it and beat myself up for not having these skills, but not so much now. I often avoid people nowadays because they seem to be unpleasable and they always seem to have a way of making me miserable. I wouldn't mind spending more time with people if it felt like more of a positive thing but it rarely does. I'm not aspie that I know of (although I'm starting to suspect) but had crippling social anxiety as a child, so I have an idea about how it feels to experience these social failures. I used to just blame it all on myself but I have since become more accepting of how I am.

I have become more and more socially withdrawn over time too. I do work so I do see other people and I live with my partner so that helps, but I will often avoid social situation and see old friends less and less now I am getting older. My anxiety about seeing people has skyrocketed and the Christmas party this year at work had me spiralling in panic for over a week. I think I just prefer my own company, I am not sure I mind it that much personally but speaking with people I often find myself with no idea what to say and looking at the floor wishing it would all go away.

It can be a vicious circle, if you're not careful.
I"ve lived alone since after separating amicably, I moved in with my parents.
They both have now passed away and I just have contact with my partner , whom I met a year ago.
When my parents died, I was a bit afraid of living totally alone, but now I've grown to actually enjoy it.
That said, I do not have any social life whatsoever, and am not sure whether I even want one.
I just know I am recently diagnosed ASD1 and have an inclination to now mix with similar people exclusively going forward.
If being socially isolated gets you down, it is up to you to expand your social circle.
Others can encourage, motivate and support you, but at the end of the day, only you can fabricate the right social mix for you.
To conclude, I'd encourage you to never lose faith in yourself: It's easy to do so, as we are a minority and today's society in completly wrapped up in self actualisation and consumerism.
Autistic people are special, we are all unique and the world is a better place for us.
Trust in your qualities, of which I'm sure you have many, and you'll prevail.
Good luck.

In terms of socialising, I seem to be getting worse as I get older. I no longer even attempt to make conversation, unless I'm with people I have known all my life, and I don't see them very often.

However, rather than getting upset about it, I just no longer care about social interaction. That's the way I am, and if people don't like it, I couldn't care less.

Ditto for me.