My ret*d younger brother .

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My younger brother , whom I will call " Gordon " , is ret*d ~ Or (at least one fficial diiagnosis was) mildly ret*d and mildly autistic .
Basically , he is " for real " austistic , not like me , you can instantly see what he is (I'll not get too caught up in the " You don't say ' ret*d ' anymore " thing now .)
My parents set up a good group home for him , he's well-taken care off and , in fact , is I'm sure in better health than I...But I haven't physically seen him for 18&1/2 years or so !
I'd make pay phone calls to him , putpay phones essentially don't exist anymore...With me health as it is now , might I even have to , when I've maybe improved slightly and the NYC area's weather is better , have to go ~ homeless ~ to the NYC-plex to , somehow , set up a situation where I can visit there ~ and maybe end up dying there ?
There , I put some melodrammy at the end . It's true , however .
I always thought of myself as " normal " in comparison then I found out I wasn't , being AS (though I always had a " not normal " tag also) ~ With my rather bookish English major/journalist parents I didn't seem that odd to them by contrast , perhaps .
I've meant to write this for a long time , now I am , finally , sort of squeezing/rushing it out .
Do any of you have a similar " more strongly AS sib " situation ?
What my life might've been if I'd been treated as " special " early on , well , to pity myself ...I wouldn't be homeless ? With no posessions ? With possible death at 56 invoked ?

...Are people so offended by my using " ret*d " ~ Look , it was the correct term when I was young/Ford was president , and I imagine that if my parents were alive ( They would be 90-ish) they'd probably still use the term - Really , no one had anything to say about this ?
NOBODY has a similar situation here , of a more strongly AS-/whatever affected bro or sis ? I don't believe that .

The thread title comes off as trollish because ret*d has become a bad word and derogatory.

...Actually , I'll tell you something about the use of the phrase ~ When I was young , Gordon clearly had a problem , he had a condition (He was 2&1/2 years younger , practically to the day , than me .) ~ But my mother would say " He's not ret*d ! " , or like that .
I can only conclude that she was holding on to some last sprig of hope , that he'd " grow out of it " according to some theory , I was so tounge-tied , I couldn't use the normal word ~ But , in the 70s , I finally asked my mother " Look m, is Gordon's condition being ' ret*d ' " , I was teenage then and she said " yes " .
I was SO ! relieved ! At least I had a normal phrase to use that I could easily explain it with ! At least I could explain it easily !
With that , maybe I don't care much that the Beastie Boys and Salt'n'Pepa using " ret*d " led to it becoming taboo .

"ret*d" was, and is, a big insult. I was called ret*d all the time when I was a kid. I destroyed a kid's ligaments one time when he called me ret*d.

It was an official psychological and medical diagnosis back in the day. Now, nobody writes down the full term "mentally ret*d." They write "MR."

All you have to do is substitute "intellectually challenged" for "ret*d."

...From what you have told me of your family dynamic , you were the somewhat more strongly ~ " affected " ~ one , more than your big brother , sometimes doing not-nice stuff w/your brothers' possessions .
If only for my parents , I can't really substitute a emphemism here .
I didn't go around calling him " You ret*d ! " like some schoolyard insult , I didn't do that to him (I believe I certainly received some of that myself ) !

My brother is NT/"normal."

I broke a few of his things when I was very young. Not past the age of five, though.

...I've long tried to figure out how I'd visit him , with his plac e maybe 60?? miles north of NYC .
I thought I'd somehow get a motel room in Westchester and have this people bring him to me there , so we'd spend an afternoon together , rather like when he visited my father's apartment ~ But , that would be dependent on my having LOTS of money .
A lower-level version I could do would be to arrange for his people to have him meet me in (I guess I'll give the town name) Croton-On-Hudson , N.Y. , where my family was for a long time , and basically , we wander around for an afternoon . I could do that even while homeless , just look presentable .
I've never told his place that I'm homeless , however , perhaps they sense things (Plus , one long-distance friend once apparently told them) ~ and my penchant for saying " There aren't any pay phones anymore " as an excuse to them might be certainly something of a hint ! ) .
Even during the time of the year that NY's weather is okay , I doubt I'm physically up to being long-term HL in NY anymore , and right now , I suppose I ~ maybe ~ could get SOME respite/rest , with my footprint/history/connections here .

You said he was only mildly affected. This means he can speak and take care of his basic needs. He might even be able to work.

Mildly affected people are like Bill in the movie Bill starring Mickey Rooney.

Sam was supposed to be moderately affected in I am Sam, but I see him as mild, too.

I hope he's not in some kind of institution, like Rain Man was.

I hope he's in a group home-type of situation, where you, as his brother, can probably visit him any time.

...It's a group home , and I believe it is heavierretardation/autism than what I understand that Mick movie to've shown .
He's " childlike " ~ Like 3-4 years old .

It would be nice if you were able to visit him.

Me, and My brother have PDD-NOS, which is mild, but we are affected to different degrees, I have more, EF, and Developmental Cordination, problems, while he has more SPD problems.. We still have each of them but to less extent. He is also Hyper-sensitive to sound (Like to the point of it hurting him). So, kind of similar.

I don't think either your brother or you are intellectually-challenged, though.

Not, really though. But my opinion is that, no Autistic (Only) people are Intellectually challenged.

I have actually met people who are autistic without any accompanying genetic disorder, and are intellectually challenged.

Most of the time, though, it seems as if people with autism accompanied by intellectual challenges have some other disorder which causes the challenges.