body language?

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I had a conversation with my friend about body language the other day and what one of them said was that body language is more of a guide and doesn't really tell you how the person really feels. it seems like NT play a guessing game when it comes to body language. I had always thought that they could tell exactly how a person feels through reading their body language but that isn't the case. I'm confused about the whole thing myself but it makes sense when you think about it. I've also come to the conclusion that perhaps we can read body language it's just that we are unable to explain it in words. i know that some of you have said that you can read peoples energies...is it not possible that we are reading their body language but are unable to fully understand what it is that we are doing?

No one tells you how they "really" feel (well, I do, but you know...).

Like most everything with me: at the time the body language is spoken to me, people appear no different to clowns with their painted on emotion to me; I laugh when someone smiles at me.... I understand what a smile "represents", but at the time I don't recognize what it "means" other than humour [to me]. I get it eventually, usually a few days after said body language is spoken to me. But then, said body language could have been a deception.... Blah.

Though I'm one of those autistic freaks who's pretty "low" on the 'trum whose experience probably differs greatly from others.

E: I guess "NT" see it as a guessing game because they know and understand deception. This is different to deducing what it "means" without deception, i.e., an apple may taste like an orange (or an off apple) when they bite into it; to me all fruit looks like rocks....

Frankly, my body language (and my understanding of it) is a *lot* better than my verbal language. Sometimes I think if everyone were mute and learning sign language was mandatory, I'd be one of the most communicative people in the world. I have no difficulties establishing that special, silent emotional connection with another person which is supposed to be a sign that one is really communicating (as opposed to just talking), and I'm normally very expressive when it comes to nonverbal signs - I gesture expansively, my face reflects pretty much anything I feel, and I love touching and embracing. It's only when I open my mouth that the trouble starts.

It's as if my body reacted to things far more quickly than the part of my brain responsible for speech. I often find my hand reaching out to touch someone's shoulder before I can say hello, or I nod enthusiastically but cannot reply until a couple seconds later, or I point at something, but have difficulties describing it, etc. It's usual for me to leave sentences hanging in mid-air and conclude them with an expressive gesture where I get lost for words. Say, my description of something exciting could sound like, "It was -- just like -- *outstretched hands going up and down* -- do you see what I mean? it was -- *sweeping gesture* great -- *another sweeping gesture* -- I loved every *excited face, hands before chest, getting ready for a different gesture* -- every moment -- of it *hands waving in the air* --" and so forth. I must be difficult to understand, but everyone agrees I get really carried away with things. Of course, when I'm depressed or too tired, I may sound flat too, but that's something different.

This is something I wanted to ask everyone. Can someone relate to this - being very extroverted, even expansive, but finding it difficult or bothersome to talk and/or not sounding coherent enough when you do? Does that even make much sense?

i can read body language...

think martial arts and sparring has really helped. i always loved the fact that the best place to look when you fight someone is not their face but moreso to their chest... people telegraph a lot of things even when they're not moving so much as sparring

That they do. Though I was trained to look more at the
stomach, as the tension there tells you more.

Plus, you don't get accused of looking at someone's tits.

No, we do not have the modules to read body language in the same way that NT do at an instinctual level. ( i think)
I am very good at 'reading' body-language. I have at read a lot of literature on the subject, it used to be helpful as part of my job.eg. to detect the micro-cues of a lie. When i interpret 'body-language' i do it through a conscious process of logic, memory and pattern recognition. (Obviously, the NT can also do it on this level as well.)

Although this is helpful, as soon as i start to interact then due to not being able to multi-task, my 'body-languange reading' is zero.
So we have the problem of not doing it on a subconcious level and not being able to talk or listen while evaluating consciously. We are not missing much though, most of what you read in the body-language books is BS anyway.

Last time i got accused of staring at someones tits I asked, "then why are you wearing that top?"
They do it on purpose.
God bless em

I learned a lot about body language by reading about it; I know I interpret it pretty well. My own isn't always so good.

I'm fine with the written word (well, usually ). Speaking can be another matter; at times I do really well, and other times I'm another of those who intersperses my words with big gestures because I just can't get it all out.

I remember when my shrink said I looked angry. I was like how did she know?

In regards to the issue of Body Lanquage? I've never been very good with deciphering it from members of the "NT" world Probably, in that I was diagnosed at a late time with having Aspergers. Still, I do consistently try to understand what is being conveyed by other from a non-verbal context however, my profiency with such skill(s) is not that great . I've not given up on myself due to this weakness I've simply tried to convey emotions & thoughts in a more direct approach whereby, I simply put forth such in verbal exchange for, that tends to be more useful for me in most cases.

On a sincere note, I'd like to say, that all Autistic people have trouble with many different things on a communication, social, emotional, and mental leve yet, this does not keep "us" from enjoying a adequately decent life.

ProfessorX