What to do about change when I'm out of college

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I don't deal with change well. I had a complete breakdown when I came to college because of so many life changes happening at once. Even minor changes affect me. So I am worried about what will happen when I get out of college in a couple of years. The original plan was to wait to get married until after college, get a job, get a house, and basically that equates to changing everything about my life as it is now. I have proposed an idea to my boyfriend to get married next year to give us a year to settle into married life before we have to deal with even more changes that will come after graduation. I am hoping that this would make this string of changes happen over a longer period of time so that I don't shut down and lose my first real job becasue of the stress. I have talked to my mother about this and she is leary. I would like to ask those hear to also have AS like I do, and understand how devastating change can be, to give their opinions and advice. Oh, and ask any questions you think will help you help me figure out if this is a good idea or not.

Thanks.

I suppose it depends on which solution you would prefer: Take time apart from the boyfriend to make things simpler or let him do most of the organizing and just do what he says until you get settled in.

Theres no real easy solution unless you want to just stay in college and go for a better degree

Well I am planning on finishing my Horticulture degree, it's just that I would be doing this while married, and my mom doesn't see that as a good idea. However, I see it as a way to not have to deal with the stress of marriage when I am out of the school environment that I am familiar with and when I am trying to start a career at the same time. All that is just too much at once. I'm asking if spacing out these changes by getting married while still in school is a good idea.

I dont think it is.

Being married brings a whole new slew of problems.

As I mentioned the best way to deal with that source of stress is to just (somehow) get him to leave you alone for a couple months during the transition.

But thats hard to do while married.

There will be plenty of time to get married after college theres no rush.. hes not going anywhere (or at least if he is then its obvious marrying him would have been a bad choice).

Thanks for the advice.

As far as making change easier (in a non-marriage fashion), maybe try developing routines that you can take with you wherever you go. For example...I always watch scrubs and listen to a certain playlist before going to bed...so i got a portable dvd player and an ipod so that no matter where I am, that routine doesn't have to change. Finding little constants can sometimes make change easier

What is all the stress over marriage about? If anything, put getting married off for longer. It is the only variable here that is optional. You have to start a career and put a lot of effort into it so that you can pay for a house which you need. If the only true reason for delaying marriage is to help you cope with change related stress then there should be no issue. If you think your boyfriend will leave you if you don't get married in the short term then I hate to say it but he's not worth keeping.

Foxman also makes a good point. Keep as many familiar things with you when you make your big transition. It will certainly take the edge off. I have just gone through a rather large lifestyle change myself, I know what it feels like.