Autistics who couldnt attend school middle/high

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i am autistic and have never EVER attended middle or high school in my life. i do too poorly in academic stuff esp. 6-7th grade and have a hard time reading and following sequences and directions and quotes (and im not even dyslexic) and many of the things are really hard to understand.

those asipe people keeping saying 'dont worry you're not tryig hard enough deal with it, kiddo" are really starting to make me want to cry. dont understand

also i kept falling behind in math alot and one of the only history story i remember is christopher columbus and his sailboat. i never learned american history or history beyond a few pages in a big heavy history book and only a couple eygept pages. i was homeschooled til early 4th grade because i wanted to attend mainstream school and see want it is like

im glad i don't know any history or math they just everything (like the hardness, boring, scary things like people killing people and athiest things because im christian, just every particle) plase understand i am trying hard enough and nobody perfect

I was home-schooled from Grade 2-Grade 8, and I am eternally grateful for it.