What is Meltdown?

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what meltdown feels like does anyone have them before im trying to understand the meltdown im not sure if i had it

Everyone is different.

Personally i just feel like i cant control myself anymore and i try and talk and i just end up screaming and crying and i try and do something but all i can do is throw things. like my whole body is on fire in a sense and i cant get my breathing under control. sometimes i cant even remember what happened or why i did certain things. afterwards im exhausted and cant really do anything.

i have Anxiety Disorder i had last time i went out of control over changing routines turn internet off after 12am and i couldnt feel anything touching me when walked over the baby gate i walked over i didnt think anything like happened there and fell over it didnt feel it all i feel is my chest is all on hot even my face went red i went my room slamed my door and screamed in pilliow and throwing things around and my mom is scared that when i was out of control this is why i hate MELTDOWNS

I am not sure about technical explanations for it, it seems varied among us.

My pre shutdown is probably the start of classical meltdown. It follows a lot of warning symptoms of my full aural or vestibular migraines.

Sound as gotten to point it is terrifying. Everything is too bright. I feel tense, almost panicked. I can't quite understand what people are saying to me, specially english. I am held in place yet want to run shrieking.. no direction in mind. I am at snap point in temperament (no need to be mad I could have been ecstatically happy only 3 minutes prior) Unlike migraine where the nausea or pain starts ; I feel like I am on Japanese game show and was dropped in a 5 ft mark filled roach tank. The crawling is unbearable. (Edit: Also smell OMG smells! I hate how the average person smells! And the horrid colognes used by 70%)

As adult I normally start seeking a refuge or self calming mechanism before the bugs arrive. Somewhere quieter (if at mall for reasons unavoidable-I flee and go sit in my car a while), less lit (leaves out most public bathrooms) and quiet. At home my son is stimulated by my onset no matter how subtle the outwards signs and the current dog goes and lays in corner (my migraine dog used to be right there, Johnny on the spot pressing on me, quietly nuzzling and a bit hostile to approach by others. Though if she was with me at onset she normally would give the go home signal for meltdown too.)
With pinching myself, grittting teeth, pulling hair, I can go to shutdown in a a busy environment. But then, I can't hear anything, I can't move, I don't respond, I simply stay still like drugged. Usually the flash point is very fast before shutdown unlike when I was a child. I will be struck dumb for hours if I let it go through.

On the surface, because my years of therapy schooling alternate actions for my stimming, it looks like typical migraine onset so I can usually use that as my bow out. People understand migraines better, even those that lash out in one <_<.

My son is also learning to self calm without classical stimms like spinning or head banging or face eating. Though my pass down is incomplete becuase I don't clear remember all the therapies anymore
If migraine is starting I head home before the lie on cold floor in the closet and sleep part comes. Poor sleep is a trigger for frequency of meltdowns and migraines