Anyone emotionally abused growing up?

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So i've been reading some of the effects of abuse and have found out that victims of such abuse have a hard time maintaining friendships, low self esteem, and exhibit developmental delays as well.

I was wondering if its possible for such a thing to either mimic certain symptoms of AS or possibly supplement other disorders i.e. ADD, schizoid personality disorder, etc.

Last edited by Greatsharkbite on 27 Mar 2012, 1:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I am not sure of the effects regarding my "problems" since most of those existed well before it, but yes..
VERY MUCH SO. Threats, scare tactics, harsh punishments all were used to try & keep me "in line" with my parent's wishes. It never really worked of course..

Sincerely,
Matthew

Yep same here, I was the one who was the irritant to my parents, between me and my brother, and punishment was often physically harsh.
I think the fact that my AS was never identified as a child, my parents thought I was just being stubborn and irrational.
And their response was do to the misunderstood aspects of a child with AS they lashed out in their frustration.

Or maybe my mother was just a freaking b**ch

I was not. My main problem is the "social communication". But I was also in special Ed. But I also have the others, except for the (anger side), I am the other way, I turn inwards. My ones more the other way, as been, shy, (fear report I did, not belonging ).

Went to Special Ed.
hit in the head with a golf ball, by my brother,
punched in the eye by a bully hard.

Trying to think of others, that would be the front.

Most of the Stuff when I look on this "The National Autistic Society" - ( The holder of this card has autism "Which includes Asperger syndrome" ). Can be chalked up to an introvert personality, I don't mind been alone, I see myself as one of those people sat in his study, while say the wife comes in with food or down in the basement inventing. (except I do it in Game programming ).

Is the link to the card I got sent:-

http://www.autism.org.uk/card

Not emotionally abused no, though my mother did like to nag (can't say I blame her really I was an as*hole).

But I did suffer a lot of emotional trauma. My nan died when I was six, dad when I was 7, ran over when I was 8 and spent ages in hospital and so on.

I was emotionally and physically abused by a mother with (in my opinion) NPD.

However, I didn't live with her until I was 8 years old, and she was engaged at the time, so I didn't live with just her until the age of 10, when the abuse started.

I also suspect that my mother had NPD. I was an only child, adopted soon after birth. From my very earliest memories, I was always in trouble for doing the wrong thing. She wasn't just emotionally abusive, she was also physically abusive as well. But then again, so was my adoptive dad. Funny because I believe he also has AS. One would think there would have been some goodness come from our personality similarities, but he was of the mindset that I needed to be just like him. I had my own special interests & there was no support there. Luckily, I never let that stop me from enjoying stuff I liked.

I would say that growing up abused, bullied, & what not, has definitely left its marks on me. I find I prefer being alone to being in the company of other humans. I also have severe anxiety, stim, etc to cope. The other odd thing is that I was so beaten down by everyone, I never tried to escape. I probably would have been better off getting away, but since I stayed...I dunno how things could have turned out. Could have been better, but could have been worse too.

Yes, as well as physically. But it didn't start until I was eleven, and I was already very much the person I am now. I have no doubt that the abuse made certain issues worse. My stepmother abused me because of my issues, she wasn't the cause of them. I wasn't the perfect little girlie girl, cheerleader/dancer,top-of-her-class, social butterfly that she had expected to parent. Not to defend her, but I know I was very difficult in some ways. I still can be! But it doesn't justify the things she did. People tend to fear and hate things that are inexplicable to them, and that was true of both of us.

Physical and verbal, mostly from my parents.

I was emotionally abused by the other kids and adults. With the perspective of time, and knowledge of my Asperger's, I realize now that the adults did not intend the emotional abuse, but were reacting to my asperger's traits. I am in my early 50s and spectrum disorders were not recognized as such when I was growing up. We were diagnosed as having emotional/behavior problems, and/or being a discipline problem child. Much of what I could not control due to my Asperger's was taken as a discipline issue, and I was punished for being stubborn and rebellious, when that was not the case. I just couldn't be the way they wanted me to be, but none of us knew what my real problem was back then. I didn't learn about classic Autism until the late 70s or early 80s, and didn't see myself in that. I learned about Asperger's between 8 and ten years ago, and immediately saw myself in that. Unfortunately, I can't send the info I've learned about Asperger's back to me and my parents in the 1960s--when I was growing up, so I can't fix the misery of my childhood. However, finding out I have Asperger's has provided me with a lot of relief, because now at least I know why I am so different. Not knowing for all those years was very stressful, on top of all the other stresses I have to deal with. At least that one stress is gone.

Emotionally and verbally abused, but not because of as traits on my behalf. I now believe my mother has borderline personalguy disorder. So she had to have control over everything and manipulate everyone in the family to see her distorted perspective of reality. If you didn't there was hell to pay. She would play me and my siblings off each other. Shout at up out of the blue for no reason.

I think this is alot to do with my social anxiety and with my communication problems. It affects my work life. I still expect people to fly off the handle at me for no reason. I keep my head down and out the way at work.

I have completely separate as traits though that can't be caused by the abuse. My logical view of the world for example.

I am beginning to think I need a formal diagnosis so I can work out how to deal with my as side and how to deal with the abused side. I wonder how much overlaps.

My answer is a resounding yes, but it didn't cause anything to manifest in me that would mimic AS or anything like that. It's more like the AS symptoms I already had led to emotional abuse especially from my father. Because in so many respects I wasn't "ordinary", he was angry, and I happen to have a father who was angry that he didn't have a "normal" son.

I was emotionally abused by my peers in school. But I think that the abuse was BECAUSE of my asperger's, not that the asperger's was a reaction to me being abused.

yes, I was abused growing up. I was raised by someone not biologically related to me, and no one had ever heard of Aspergers, but they knew I was/am 'defective' and they were determined to reform me. Nobody had ever heard of 'emotional abuse' when I was in school, I knew I was being abused, but I didn't know what to call it, so I had no way of reporting it {not that that would have done any good, I don't think....} so I had that compounding my problems, and I have a hard time sorting out which is the autism which is the abuse even now. It's really taking it's toll now that I'm older and have a lot less energy and anger than when I was younger. The anger propelled me forward, but now that I'm older, the deep deep sadness is setting in... and I don't even want to think about the toll on the inside--hormones, cortisol, and internal physical deterioration... abuse on top of autism. I won't even mention the abandonment and attachment issues....

Sorry you've had it so rough. Sounds like we we raised in the same kind of environment. I just turned 50. Still don't have a DX, & all the stress, anxiety, & everything else (possibly PTSD) have/are taking their toll on my physical & mental health. I have another visit with a shrink today. I am expecting the worst, but hoping for something better.

Yes. I was emotionally abused by my Grandma, who raised me from infancy til I was about 6. The hardest part of healing from that, is that I know she didn't mean to do it. Before accusing me of using "didn't mean to" as a coppout for Grandma, it's actually true. She was becoming demented in age, and sadly had to go in a sanitarium when I was 6. The bottom line is that the damage to the young heart and soul is the same, whether or not the abuser meant to abuse. It might be easier to deal with the feelings of anger for having been abused, if the abuser was of sound mind, and you can justify and focus blame on that person when suitable, and relieve yourself from being at fault for the abuse. It's way too complicated to put in a paragraph or two.

The bad thing is, that when you are abused emotionally as a small child, you most likely will wind up abused by others, including other relatives, "friends" (as you believe they are at the time), and even your spouse or partner. Abusers seek the abuse-ables to connect with. It's up to the abused to break that chain!

Charles