Trouble with phrases or common sayings?

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I know we take jokes literaly and all but what about common phrases?

For example, there was a commercial for an upcoming Dr. Phil episode yesterday on T.V. and Dr. Phil said, "I would've gave my front seat in hell to have been there"

What does that mean? Why does Dr. phil have a front seat in hell? Is a front seat in hell better than a backseat or any other seat? You're in hell! does it really matter? I can't figure this one out. Sayings like that don't make any sense to me.

It's my world.... I have no idea what it means.

"Normal" people speak funny.

I'm not sure that saying would make sense to ANYONE Dr. Phil seems...kind of iffy anymore. Maybe he just randomly says things now as part of a "persona"?

I'm not sure if this would count, but I have big problems with "How are you" that people are always saying. Until fairly recently, I would tell people how I was...since, you know, THAT'S WHAT THEY ASKED. I had to be told (probably by my mom) that they don't actually want to know how you are.

Now I know you're supposed to do this whole "fine, thank you, how are you?" thing in response, but I can't, it sounds so bizarre. When I (rarely) ask someone how they are, it's because I WANT TO KNOW HOW THEY ARE!

So now when someone says that, I just kind of mumble "fine" and try to keep moving, or switch to talking about something else.

I'm sure there are more things like that, but I can't think what right now. I can't wait to see what else people come up with.

I'm an abstract thinker, I often say things that don't make sense to NTs AND Aspies.

Sometimes I get these, sometimes I connect them logically after analysis and just conclude that the person that said what they said was stupid and it would have been more easier to just say what you really meant instead of wasting my time saying something dense that I'd have to think of the millions of possibilities of what you meant by it.

I always had trouble with sayings and cliches. I can usually figure them out eventually, but I usually have to think about it for a little while to get the analogy. I never did understand the phrase "a bird in hand is worth two in the bush." I finally just asked someone to explain it to me. I sort of get it now, but it still seems obscure and "out there." There are still a few other such sayings/cliches out there that I still don't have a good handle on. Kind of like the phrase "in one fell swoop." I mean, I know how it's used, and can even use it correctly, but what the f*#k? I have no idea how that phrase could have come about, i.e. how those particular words can fit together.

I often misinterpret what people say. it can be hilarious sometimes. Once I interpreted someone saying 'standing room only' as 'standing Ramonely', which brought a fabulous image to my mind!

Yeah- I don't think that should make sense to ANYONE.. you WOULDN'T give up your seat in hell?? As previously stated, it's HELL.. you should be wanting to get the HELL oughtta HELL..

Or maybe Dr. Phil is a closet sado-masochist?

LOL

The other day somebody ask me how I found martial arts class. I said I've been here before.

so, its not just me. Good.

It took me years to finally understand "There but for the grace of God go I" I think it was the use of the word "I" at the end of the phrase that confused me.

What does "Don't let the sun go down apon your wrath" mean?

And to I think, wolfpup, I know what you mean. My Father is also AS and got in trouble alot as a kid for not saying things like good morning or good night or for not responding to random chitchat like, Nice weather we're having, eh? When someone makes chitchat like that to me I go blank. Then they just look at me weird.

Maybe there is a good concert in hell he wanted to see?

Why are there seats in hell and how do you know which is the front and the back if there's no base to where the seats are directed to unless Satan's throne is surrounded by seats and behind it is just some bigass wall of nothing. Than that doesn't make sense either because isn't hell suppose to be in the inner layer of earth which would make it a sphere? With that in mind there's no ending or starting point in which seats would be lines up unless the seats arn't line up. Than if the seats arn't lined up and they're just wherever than there would be no front seat.

Maybe Dr Phil has been to hell and knows something we don't know.

I propose we ask him.


My friend proposed that maybe hell is an eternal buss ride and like the carrier buses a backseat in hell would mean you're by the toilet smelling other people's s**t for all eternity.

Yes, all the time.

Here is an example-

I was watching the TV and my father said...there is a plant in the audience, because I was not thinking of what he was referring to, I started looking for a plant with leaves and flowers.

I was never able to interpret the palindrome sentence "Able was I ere I saw Elba," which is often used as a palindrome model.