Getting old as an Aspie

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Have any of you older Aspies out there found that some of your autistic traits tend to lessen or get worst as you got older? For me, my ability to control/diffuse meltdowns has improved massively, but as a counterpoint, my desire to try and fit in (pass off as neurotypical) and engage with people is getting less and less.

The older I get, the more irritable and prone to meltdowns I get.

I'm late to this identification "club"

I'm 60 plus - level one

My wife said I've been better overall lately.
She's the one that started bringing home books on spouses of Aspies last year.
(Sort of like young wife's knitting booties in the 50's as a sign a baby is coming)
Yes I have old references, that sometimes make my clients go WHAT?

I am glad you asked that question. I am 80 years old. I consider myself an adapted Aspie. I have become very accomplished at getting along with the NT world which includes my wife and all but one of my children. I have learned by empirical means how to pass for human and it is very rare that my "Aspie self" shines forth in the company of NTs. Now and again I show my literal mindedness which sometimes annoys or baffles my NT neighbors and friends. I am too old and tired to have rip-roaring meltdowns. Actually I have not had them for close to 40 years. Also I am developing a social intuition which is close to the natural social instincts of NTs. It is like riding a bike. Once you learn to do it, it is easy and virtually impossible to forget.

Mellowed a lot as I have gotten older. Still get anxious, but it's about work-related stuff rather than everyday stuff (for the most part)

I think I have become better at avoiding meltdowns and my social skills have improved, but I think my obsessive thoughts might be getting worse as I age.

I wasn't diagnosed till about 8 years ago. I'd been getting better at understanding myself and other people all my life, very slowly, and I think I accelerated a little after diagnosis, though I wasn't given a therapist or any advice. I think people mature with age anyway, as long as they don't stop learning. But the diagnosis also shook my self-confidence, though that seems to be coming back again. I don't think my traits have changed at all, I just manage them better, and my personality is much as it always was. I never was one for fitting into the NT mainstream, I just wait for the right kind of people to turn up, sometimes they do and I'm fine. I've begun to do better with relationships, I behave in a more mature way. I've probably become a better judge of character. The world of work probably burned me out a little, and gave me a few emotional issues, I managed to hold down a couple of jobs and got out in the nick of time, and built up enough pension rights to just about give me enough money to do everything I need to do.

My sensory issues have always waxed and waned, basically I've remained in relatively good health, I go through a few good years and a few bad ones. It's good not to be so worried about all the little sub-clinical things that I couldn't understand before, they're most likely down to an amplified sense of pain and irritation. Right now it's fairly good.

There's an old saying "The older you get, the wiser you get". That said, I always believed that wisdom come with age, because the older you get, the more experience you gain with living. As far as my aspie traits go, I still have them and they are the same now as they where when I was younger. The only thing that has changed is the fact that I've learned to manage it better.

My hamster wheel of a brain goes and goes.
Yoga and other exercise like cycling and swimming counseling and talking with wife and strong men from church helps Lots.

I'm also back playing music more. My main one is harmonica. I also play ukulele and guitar. But have confidence of 40 years of band of rock, country, folk , blues and Gospel that makes it more comfortable on harp. (and less on strings)

I've found my social skills and confidence in social settings have gradually improved, as I've gotten better at reading facial expressions and body language. It's still very much a conscious effort (in which I'm consciously examining facial muscles and posture for clues about their mood), but it's a lot better than when I was a kid and had no clue. I've gotten better at controlling angry/frustrated outbursts, due to a school counselor working with me when I was getting into fights. I've gotten better at speaking because of speech therapy (at one point, many people outside my family couldn't understand me).

On the other hand, my sensory issues are much, much worse than they were when I was in my 20s. I think some of that may be because my health is not as good, and I'm in a stressful job and stressful commute. I had more options to avoid stressful sensory environments when I was younger.

Wow! Thanks for all the replies, everyone. It's interesting to see the individual similarities and differences pertaining to ageing on the spectrum. I myself have also developed greater ease at deciphering the facial expressions and body language as I've aged. That being said, it doesn't mean I've finally grasp the concept of "hidden intentions", "gossiping", and "office politics"... I think I never will. I'm just as naive as I was in my youth. Both my husband and I are on the spectrum, and having to work and deal with the city life is torture for us. Our goal (when we retire) is to live as Grey Nomads (I think you guys in America call those folks Snowbirds.) We both find peace and solace, out in nature.

I'm 42, so I don't know if I am exactly an 'older Aspie' BUT I will say this: the sensory issues are worse. My self-consciousness about not blending in is nearly gone. My desire to 'make it work' with people is also nearly gone. I don't push myself to interact if I don't want to. I use more support mechanisms, like ear plugs, and I stim when I want to or need to. I bounce in my booth at the restaurant and on my toes in line and to heck with anybody who may think it's odd.

Less likely to freak out and have a meltdown, yet more likely to remain in a blue funk for days at a time.

I'm the same way. I may have gotten better at reading facial expressions (but still way below where NTs are), but figuring out WHY people feel the way they do, or how to respond, is very challenging. I'll often ask the people at work who know I'm autistic how to handle something or what someone meant in a staff meeting. I'm still no good at detecting hints or falsehoods, and struggle to tell the difference between good-natured banter and mean-spirited insults.

So true. I am in one right now and been in it for a few weeks. It is imbued with a very real sense of "I don't give a damn" and even if I do give a damn I remain in strong denial and resist the temptation to be reasonable.

I was joking with my wife yesterday at lunch.

I said it isn't Autism it's Material.
She laughed and said you should use that.
Took the lind out for a "test drivel and she was right.

Me - "Reader and Righter"