Dealing with family member with mental illness

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Does anyone have tips on how to deal with living with someone who has mental illness? My father (who I love but not his attitude) was diagnosed with bipolar two years ago but was just diagnosed yesterday with OCD and PTSD as well.

My family always guessed he had OCD (he's always been very peculiar about his dress/ cleaning habits) but the PTSD is a shock. I've struggled with meeting my father's expectations for years and have never know what to expect from him. He often calls me lazy and fat, as I tend to come home and veg after work/ I have issues with portion control & eat out of bordom/ like to chew on things.

However , when I come home from work I'm drained and tired after being in a noisy and changing environment (I work as an aide at a school). I don't think he understands this nor does he understand that I have different values/ beliefs (political and spiritual and animal care etc.) and ideas on organization and such. He constantly likes to make jokes about how I'm a dog killer (I let a dog out when I was 4 years old after seeing him do it with the dog to chase a cat) and seriously when our oldest dog just recently died.

I don't know what kind of mood he's going to be in a lot of the time or if his meds will knock him out or not when I get home and it's hard to deal with/ I end up stimming by scratching and picking at my skin, which isn't healthy. Is there any sort of advice you can pass along to help me deal with him?

The one thing I can think of at this point....is that you have to convey to your father the meaning of "boundaries."

Make sure he doesn't go "too far" with his moods. He needs to restrain himself. He needs the fact that he has to restrain himself conveyed to him.

I'm sorry you're going through this--and I'm sorry I didn't answer sooner.

I can relate a bit. My mother is Bipolar and has OCD and my aunt has OCD and is a hoarder. My mom will go on rants when I start eating (I'm obese and she is obsessed with her weight, almost to the point of an eating disorder) and if she believes our house is messy. I usually just try to remind myself that she doesn't mean the awful things she says and I try not to let it bother me, but I still metaphorically "walk on eggshells" around her.

I can relate to your father about wanting things clean. I never understood what is so hard about wiping crumbs off the kitchen counter or cleaning up after yourself after being done with it or how hard is it to just put a plate in the sink lol. I still don't see how this would drive anyone crazy, it makes me think if many people have executive functioning issues.

I don't have any advice here except just pick up after yourself.

Now here I am an adult getting revenge on my mother by not following her rules of a clean house so I am lazy and I say "Too bad I am not OCD about a clean house anymore" to her and I just want her to fell my pain she put me through as a kid with my brothers. It's her turn to have OCD.