Does AS And Loneliness Go Hand In Hand

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I've noticed that a lot of AS sufferers feel lonely at some points in their life due to difficulties in maintaining "friends" or people to talk to. Personaly I feel no ill effects when alone for long periods and it can be argued that people need some social interaction for sanity's sake but I feel I would probably be fine if I was the last man on earth.

So, Is it common for AS sufferers to be lonely?

There is a definite tendency for people with autism to become lonely at times.

In my case they certainly seem to.

One of those can't win situations.

Feel lonely sometimes, but after finally getting to socialize for a little bit it's a great relief to retreat back into solitude.

feels like it's a defining characteristic

Well I can only speak for myself, since I don't know anyone else with AS. And yes, I am incredibly lonely. Despite being surrounded by people constantly.
I am fortunate enough for those people to try & understand, and am grateful for it. But it is still not the same.

As a child, I definitely felt lonely. When you're stuck at school with people for 6+ hours a day and interactions are non-existent or negative, then that's very hard. I think younger people care a lot about fitting in.

The older I get, the less I care (though I do have my husband around now, so I'm never completely lonely and perhaps that's the key). I think, perhaps, as a younger person I might have wanted friends for the sake of wanting friends - because people were supposed to have friends, and not because I actually enjoyed any of the things that people like doing. At university I definitely tried to connect with people, even went to night clubs when I'd rather have been at home, relaxing, but it just wasn't me and was always very forced.

Now, I know myself well enough to know that it isn't worth forcing these things when I'm not getting anything out of it. I'm never going to be a social creature, it isn't what I want, and I'm much happier keeping myself (mostly) to myself. I think that, did I not have a family that I adore and love being around, I could very comfortably live my entire life in my own little world.

What doesn't work at my current stage of life is that I have a young child whose social life depends on mine. She has led me to one or two genuine friends (my first ever friends) which is lovely, but I have also pushed myself into a world of socialisation that just isn't right for me - the cliques and bullying, nights out, big group conversations, competitive behaviours and jealousy. It's hard going and I'd rather not be doing that, but a little person depends on me for chances to interact with others her age.

I believe (and hope) that at least when I'm ageing I should not have as many troubles with loneliness as NTs. I will be perfectly content to retreat into my own little world as I get older.

Choosing to be alone does not equate to loneliness. I choose to be alone and I'm never lonely.