Page 1 of 1 [ 1 post ] 

PrinceAspien
Butterfly
Butterfly

Joined: 18 Sep 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 11
Location: Old York

23 Sep 2016, 3:29 am

OK,

So I wanted to see if my experience with language is shared by anyone on here and put an idea out there. I definitely had a lot of trouble "self-editing" throughout my life, often appearing rude or weird. On a side note I also realise now that in my brain the sound of a word is often separated from meaning (eg. sometimes I mis-hear what my wife says and say something absurd in response like "lala was in lulu land"? My wife then says, "think rationally, how on Earth would that be something I just said?")

What I've found out so far: we are not born with internal monologue (obviously, because we have no language). We use our vocal muscles when we "think" (silently) in speech (I mean NT and AS). This is because internal speech begins as external speech in us as babies. I/ and possibly you (?) did not learn to drive many external aspects of language inwards (though we do internalise and loop other forms of language). The "normative" strategy of kids to self-edit is when they realise that things, such as acquiring junk food snacks, as an example, can be acquired through subtlety and deception rather than screaming "I want chocolate".

I/ you (? this is the part where you chip in) did not really understand deception at all growing up. In fact this left me pretty angry and confused with society. This is entirely in line with specialists saying that we (AS) do not conform with various cultural ideas of "peacocking", that is displaying fairly pointless and meaningless cultural signs to attract attention/power/status. Internal/deceptive thought is a form of peacocking (think politicians or Game of Thrones) in which you often hide your true feelings to attain a more distant future goal. I was always terrible at this but now through imitation I understand why NTs pretend to like people they in fact dislike.

Note: I have actually compared this idea to many many instances in my own life and those of friends with AS/ AS traits who have manifestations of echolalia (I used to mirror people who said "happy birthday" by saying "happy birthday" back to them, etc, and I annoy my wife by singing the exact same song lyric, not the song but the same line, over and over).

Any thoughts?