Page 1 of 1 [ 7 posts ] 

bizmack
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 221
Location: San Diego

13 May 2007, 4:57 pm

i know that i am a very sensative guy who only shows emotion when in a relationship....
ive spent the past day now crying like anewborn because of the current status or not status of the relationship with my girlfriend....

ive posted many times about things from which me and my girlfriend have gone through yet it just seems to be soo hard sometimes for us to be together.....what i feel to be true love has taken me over and i cannot think or breath without her mixed within....ive cut myself a couple of times and considered worse but talked myself down after common sense had taken over...
im desparately awaiting her decision about what she wants and where she wants to be...i feel as if the next conversation we share may be the begining of the rest of our lives or the end of my emotions and my heart...

i can honestly say that because i never want to experience this pain ever again if we are not to be...i would rather be shot than to feel this internally...at least from a bullet you know what and how to treat its entry and exit and can judge by its wound how to fix it...my mind is mush and my heart has a crack that only she can mend...i am an 26 Aspie male and i may have just seen what the rest of my life will be like from know on....with tears starting to stream down my eyes at the moment, i must ask of all of WP, how do i be without someone who has been everything for me......how do i breath....how do i be...........


_________________
the conventional view serves to protect society from the painful job of thinking.


TylerPaul
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 28 Apr 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 126
Location: Fargo, ND

13 May 2007, 5:24 pm

You cannot define yourself by who you are with. There is a you without her and you have to reintroduce yourself to him. I do feel your pain. I've got the scar on my leg to prove it. I'm still suffering from my great loss from years ago but I would have never known myself if we'd stayed together. I wouldn't be who I am now and that would have been a far greater loss.

I'm sorry that things are hard. It does get easier. It will.

How long were you two together?


_________________
Life should come with background music
http://www.myspace.com/brnsgrstudios


Spot17
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 17 Apr 2007
Age: 51
Gender: Female
Posts: 493
Location: lost, as usual...

13 May 2007, 5:25 pm

What are your hobbies/interests? Try to focus on them and not think so much about her.



LostInSpace
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Apr 2007
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,617
Location: Dixie

13 May 2007, 5:30 pm

I guess you just get by day by day. As someone else said, try to focus on your hobbies, or on spending time with other friends. Good luck! We're here for you.



bizmack
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 221
Location: San Diego

13 May 2007, 8:24 pm

we have been together 3 and a half months....i fall hard and fast as i was sure she had...
ive known most people to say that 3 months iisnt enough time to be serious, but i look at life like this:we are heare and then we die...i am ready to settle down as i thought she was...

it didnt seem rushed at all even though we each have issues that we have both agreed that we need to work out...i find myself protecting her whenever i consult in family and friend..they tell me not to take things so seriously and let her go but i cannot do such a thing...i am an idiot for love and even worse when in love......this is a product of my personallity....i must examine analyaze and question things especially things which i care about...

my passions are writing, drawing, art, music....i know i should start making something...isnt that when art is its greatest when there is great pain behind it? guess this would be the opportune time
for that at least...

i just did this 10-12 mile bike ride and ive exhaugested some of the thoughts out of my mind of her, but i broke down three times in that 3 hour time frame...funny thing is i actually broke down another time as well when my tire went flat about 4 miles from my apartment....
luckily enough this couple helped me out after only walking about a mile......i guess there can still be hope even when things look there worst...thank you all for your words...i will take your advise and try and take it day to day and stay as positive as possible pursuing my passions..


_________________
the conventional view serves to protect society from the painful job of thinking.


Last edited by bizmack on 13 May 2007, 8:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

martin_nyc
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 28 Mar 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 175

13 May 2007, 8:26 pm

Pain goes away in time. For now, experience it and don't try to chase it away. It will go on its own.



richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Xfractor Card #351

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind

13 May 2007, 8:28 pm

well i wish you luck dude. personally this is why im not too overly worried about shacking up with someone, sure somedays i want a girlfriend but why? they'll either take atvantage of me and my money, or they'll end the relationship and i wont know how to respond


_________________
Winds of clarity. a universal understanding come and go, I've seen though the Darkness to understand the bounty of Light