Obsessed with aspegers

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I have not been diagnosed with HFA but resonate with all the symptoms. I have noticed that I am now obsessed with the diagnosis and obsess all day long. Is this just another sign I am an aspie?

Symptoms-
sensory - perfumes/colognes are invasive and uncomfortable, i have a hard time focusing when there is a smell around because it bothers me, i dont wear jewelry or certain fabrics because it's annoying to feel against my skin all day, thinking back to when working in carpentry I would always feel weird once my hands got dirty, i am sensitive to high pitch and low pitched sounds but only once in a while for instance when laying down for bed a few weeks back I heard a low pitch hum that would kind of take over my mind and I couldn't fall asleep and the sound persisted for many nights and kept me up. sometimes the high pitch of the tv is distracting, sometimes the sound of the fluroscent light in my kitchen is distracting

social - inept, dont feel like I 'connect' with others on a deeper level, always felt different, horrible with eye contact and interpersonal communication, i find many times that my face is hard to hold at rest and I have to like hold it in a position that i think others will think looks normal and its very exhausting (this is not all the time but moreso in a larger group setting like if im invited to a dinner....those are a disastor!), after social gatherings I feel drained, depressed because I feel distant and cant connect like everyone else and relieved I get to be alone and focus on my interests, i can say hi to people and 'pretend' to be normal and even carry on small talk to a certain extent, but if the conversation gets more serious about becoming a relationship it gets very stressful because I don't want to show the person that I'm a wreck socially. I can hold it together but eventually people start to see I have social quirks and eye contact issues.

absent mindedness - because I am focusing on internal dialogue and smaller details of what im doing i find I get absent minded, its noticeable at work and everyone knows how absent minded I am

Obsessions - hard to look back to early age, but I do remember the obsessions with baseball cards, magic the gathering and marvel, and eventually paintball for a short time in adolescence, then at 15 I remember picking up the guitar and that's literally all I've done for 15 years, cutting articles out of magazines like lessons and compiling all the lessons and sheet music I have into organized collections. I spent my entire high school career with my guitar around my neck - also got into particle physics and astronomy and would try to read as many books on the subject as I could. I didnt really have friends that I spent my time with after school because I wanted to be home playing my guitar and focusing on my obsessions, everyone in my family tells me I have a one track mind and all I do is talk about the same things, at work, I notice I am always bringing up things I am interested in that may not even really be appropriate for my coworkers and so I spend a lot of time questioning what im going to say in social situations because I feel like Im always thinking about the same things, I find that I have general obsessions like playing music but also find I 'get into things' and obsess over them for a few months and drive everyone nuts around me with that topic and then move on to another....

Emotions/Stress - I get very stressed at work because the job is not linear and plans change and things come up often which makes me very agitated, I have a hard time leaving a certain task to do something else because it stresses me, when stressed I have a bad affect and usually have hard time showing emotion, sometimes find hard to 'rest' my face when stressed from these nearly inocuous changes - not sure if this is just normal, but seemed like a HFA trait

change - I dislike change and eat the same foods and have the same routines for showering, cleaning, etc...

What you guys think?

The traits you listed above are associated with Aspergers. It is not unusual when people start to suspect they are "Aspies" for Aspergers to become a "special interest".

Do you have an idea about what you want to do about it?

I actually wrote about this in my blog series... it's HERE

Thanks for responding guys! It makes more and more sense as the days go by now. I have an appointment with my psych who sees me for social anxiety to do a diagnosis. I honestly just want confirmation. This week I've come to accept it's 99% HA and it has made me understand how to live my life. Now I realize it's not social anxiety. I has the anxiety because I spent my life 'trying' very hard to cover up these deficits. If try so hard to be 'normal' and I was interpreting these social deficits as anxiety. It's really putting things into perspective and I'm realizing I don't have to act and pretend to be normsl. I can just be myself and the weird interpersonal stuff is just me, it's more of an acceptance...

During the two-year period after I found out about AS and before I got diagnosed, I obsessed over it too, it became the focus of my whole world, and everything I and others did or said got related back to it somehow. It's still a strong interest of mine, but the rabid obsessiveness has cooled a little since I was diagnosed. It was like I got the answer I needed, and I no longer had to "prove" to myself that every little thing I did was related to autism. I guess you could say I'm more secure in myself now.

The symptoms you listed are definitely red flags for AS, and I don't see anything specific in your post that would point to you not having it, or to a different diagnosis. Let us know how your eval goes, good luck!

Great to read Star. I am also in the same situation. I'm noticing things all day at work and questioning whether it's related to my autism. Even noticing coworkers do something that reminds me. I am going through a lot of doubt thinkong yes I have it then next situation noticing I'm Ok socially (Ok to have surface level convos and say some things with my coworker) and it throws wrench in the gears. Do those who have been diagnosed have Ok weeks where u feel better at talking and making eye contact? I also wonder when I'm not very sensitive to smells on a specific day. I question if I really do have ASD. Other days my social skills feel crippled and many times where smell really bothers me. I guess TL; DR - can you have "good days"? Or is this indication I font have ASD? One thing I should point out is I may have a successful social encounter, but there is still a problem with getting more close and obviously I have no interest in spending my time outside of the forced time I'm with people to socialize with them because of the deficit and also because I'd rather be alone

I do have some days where I feel more autistic. It is not that one is more autistic, it is a combination of stress and tiredness making it more difficult to "pretend to be normal". This is true for many conditions, for example if you have a bad knee, it is going to hurt more when you are tired.