Weird Nervous Behavior Difficulties

Post Reply New Topic

I had NO idea what to put for the title, so I am just going to make this as understandable as possible. So basically I am often the victim of highly aggressive people. I've been bullied and insulted by so many people throughout my life. Every sociopath I've EVER encountered (Yes I know they are sociopaths) usually stares me down for a good couple of minutes with this weird cold stare and then follows me around, getting me to tell them personal things, then suddenly attacks me without warning. I don't understand this and I would like it to stop, but I know that's not going to happen, so I want to be able to build a thicker skin and I know that to do this perhaps I need to secure myself on the outside and remove the emotional pain and fear on the inside.

So to start with, when confronted or criticized, especially with something I can't argue with (Sociopaths commonly come up with stupidly difficult arguments such as insults on my appearance or irremovable personal flaws), I tend to get water in my eyes and the corners of my mouth get tight. I also become stiff and twitchy, I feel like I'm going to fall, my arms don't move, my neck and head are the worst, and I really don't understand these behaviors and I would like it if anyone knows how to handle things like this, I don't know if I have another disorder causing them.

The second problem is the internal pain. I want to be able to shut up and not care about insults, but instead it hurts me so bad on the inside I seek revenge at all costs, and I just can't seem to not care. It's just words but just knowing that I can think about them makes me obsess over every insult, I am a walking target. I have 2 irrational fears, one of breaking down and 1 of internal pain or not being accepted.

I've tried to fix this problem using some very controversial and questionable methods, such as developing personalities that I believe are likeable that other people can't criticize. It's like watching a movie and seeing a character who doesn't care what other people say, or can come up with a very witty response to a criticism, then wanting to be that character. I am unable to find myself as I don't know who I really am. Another way I fix the problem is by desiring isolation, but I need people as we all do and I don't want to wither away into insanity by staying hidden in a log cabin for the rest of my life, unless there's a way to fix that as well.

I have definitely felt this way too. Things have gotten better for me, though some people still give me a hard time. I'm sorry to hear about what you are going through.

I think most people do develop a social mask that they put on that is not completely their genuine selves. I think this is a good defense technique. That's why people fake smile and act busy so often, I think. I used to not like it, but now I see that it is a system that works.

If someone insults you, it certainly doesn't mean that they are right! I'm starting to feel that there is nothing you can do to avoid being insulted by people. It seems to be just an unpleasant part of life . But, you don't have to listen to them! Think about what you value about yourself. Their opinion can't change that.

At least that's what I try to do. I hope things get better for you .

I think that the reaction you experience when faced with unkindness is normal. It sounds to me like a form of freezing response to a verbal attack. I would assume that being attacked so makes you upset or anxious, and stiffness and twitching, along with the other symptoms described, can be caused by anxiety or upset. The water in your eyes and tight corners of the mouth are both associated with crying. I don't think you need to worry about having another disorder, as it seems quite normal to me.