Is there a degree of elitism at play ?

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Ie those fortunate enough to be born at a time when recognition of autism was greater, and access to a diagnosis easier, being somewhat dismissive/critical of those of us from an earlier era who have struggled for professional recognition of our problems.

I think it is mostly lack of actually experiencing a world so very different in this regard. Poor Theary of Mind is not helping matters eithier.

My parents tried to explain what it was like growing up during World War Two and growing up without rock and roll, television, and the pill etc. I get a lot of it intellectually, but I can never really replicate the actual experience.

From what I can see, Aspies diagnosed in younger years seem more negative toward the condition than Aspies who were diagnosed in later adulthood. I'm assuming this is due to the difference in how the condition has been introduced into our lives. Diagnosis in childhood seems to lead Aspies to see the condition as more of a disability. Diagnosis in adulthood seems to commonly lead to a more positive perspective. In those cases Asperger's represents a release from the self-loathing and inward frustration that we always assumed was our own fault.

I can't say that I've seen any elitism from either the late or the early diagnosed. I've seen Aspies who haven't found any Aspie super powers yet, who have only experienced the bad sides of the condition with none of the respective "good"s, and they've told me that my positive attitude toward the condition actually annoys them or degrades their experience. I can fully understand that, and have adjusted myself accordingly. Before mixing with other Aspies, I had never even considered that my positive attitude could have a negative effect on them.

I keep coming across young people suggesting that because I survived without a diagnosis or support that I don't have autism. It's the same old "if you can pass you're not autistic" in a new young presentation. As an older female I have resigned myself to hearing this repeatedly in the future.

They are just individual opinions, the anti self diagnosis element on this site will surface from time to time, they have their reasons for feeling as they do.

I wouldn't take any of it to heart, as I believe a less vocal majority here can relate directly to your experiences.

Yes and no. Since I realized that my behavior was the result of a mental illness/condition, I have been able to forgive myself a bit; to stop blaming myself and to move forward with this new knowledge and the skills and support I now have. These things do not, however, change my being autistic and I still know that I am flawed and will always need support be it medication or my community.

If I have any superpowers they are not that super. There are things I know I am stronger at than most people; my memory, my attention to detail, etc. But no stopping bullets for me.

I think passing through life without a diagnosis makes people more 'normal'. It doesn't get rid of the struggles and stress, but somehow people find their way. They have no choice. As far as everyone is concerned, and as far as they're concerned, they are normal. So, they're on the same playing field as everyone else.

It's not necessarily that people were not diagnosed because they're so 'normal', but that they became that way because they weren't diagnosed. Cause and effect, and working out which is which, is complicated.

People that are diagnosed earlier have accommodations and 'special treatment' from an early age. This avoids that "what is wrong with me?!", but it does raise a different type of autistic person, I think.

Which is best? Who knows, really? I partly wish that I'd known much earlier in life, but at the same time there is a huge part of me feeling grateful for that not being the case.

I believe that if awareness had been better, I would have been treated differently. I would have been raised as a disabled person. And whilst life would have been significantly easier for me emotionally, because of it, would I trade that for the complete independence and 'normality' I have now? I can't say.

These are the situations. For the people living them, they can't be changed. I think there are positives and negatives to both. But, I can understand why a younger person that has spent most of their lives being raised as 'disabled' would struggle to think of a whole generation that weren't. Perhaps, it's an insight into what they could have been - for better or worse - had they not been diagnosed. And it's a confusing thing to think about, even for me as a grown woman!

You see, from my perspective, I see those as superpowers. Perhaps the difference is that I don't see the additional disadvantages as particularly troublesome, because my life is such that I'm able to work around and ignore them. For instance, my attention to detail and perfectionism mean that I'm very good at what I do, which means I work from home and don't need to be around people, which means I can have my groceries delivered instead of going to a shop, etc.

Addition to my last post:

And, despite the fact that I was raised assuming that I wasn't autistic, I got the diagnosis so that I could have some of those accommodations. So, as much as I feel grateful for the 'normality' in my life, I accept that having that normality comes at a very high internal price and that my life is happier and easier with the knowledge of my disability.

And, despite the fact that I can't tell what would have been better for me, and that I feel quite grateful for growing up on the 'normal playing field', I know that I wouldn't want that for my own child. If my child turned out to be autistic, she would get all of the accommodations required to make her life happy and comfortable, because that would be more important to me than raising her on that normal playing field. Again, rightly or wrongly. She may grow up and wish I'd just raised her normal. There's no right answer, I don't think.

I am trying to make my life fit me. I have two months to go until I finish a one-year transcription course, which I am hoping will allow me to work from home.

That's fantastic, honestly working from home feels almost weightless. And I actually tell new clients that I'm Aspie as a selling point!

We're facing that dilemma with my 9-year-old nephew. My parents and I (knowing what to look for) have always seen strong autism traits in him, but his parents prefer to turn a blind eye to it. Now he's at the point where teachers are noting his struggles in the classroom, but not yet wanting to bring up the dreaded 'A-word'.

Even in today's world, with much more awareness of autism, there is a reluctance to stigmatize a child with a psychiatric label, when there is still a hope that 'maybe he'll be okay if we just don't say anything'. That's basically how it was for me as a child, and while I barely managed school with lots of support from parents and teachers, I never managed to make the transition to adult life, and was unable to cope with the pressures of the 'real world'.

There are some who would prefer to define autism as a condition that is glaringly obvious to casual observers. But psychologists currently define it as a broader spectrum of symptoms, not necessarily obvious and requiring careful diagnosis. And until they change their stance on that, I think we need to accept that definition.

As for 'elitism', policing, gatekeeping, etc... Sometimes I just have to laugh, that 'only a professional can diagnose autism' - meaning it's not obvious - yet simultaneously, if it's not obvious, you don't have it. I've come to accept that ignorant attitudes abound - in the real world, and here on WP - but there are also many people who do understand the issues faced by adults on the spectrum, and I'm grateful for that.

I'm doing my practicum right now and I love it.

I was diagnosed in childhood, and since the day I was diagnosed I have always felt angry and bitter about it.

I've been diagnosed nearly 19 years and I still haven't found any positives, so it has always just felt like a disability to me. Kind of like a learning and behavioural disability, with emotional issues too.

I do often wonder how other members here (particularly those who grew up in the 90s like me) got away with not being diagnosed through childhood, and received a diagnosis in adulthood. Why was mine so obvious, when other girls on the mild end of the spectrum like me go unrecognised? I wasn't even delayed in any milestones as a baby and I was a sociable baby too. Makes me miserable.

Indeed. And as normal as we can get when forced into the 'normal' way of doing things, it clearly still does not work. Otherwise, we wouldn't have one or two generations of adults now seeking a diagnosis and being grateful for it despite never having that label growing up.

Yes, many of us have done quite well considering. And many of us have had doors open to use that perhaps younger autistic people, diagnosed earlier, will never ever get to walk through. But, clearly 'he'll be okay if we just don't say anything' is still not enough, because here we are as grown adults saying "it's never worked as it should".

I can understand people thinking a significant amount of professional training or whatever might be required, but at least some of us are known for easily breezing on past formalities and just getting on with the business at hand. However, it could certainly be accurate to say a professional diagnosis is required if someone is seeking recognition as an Aspie (for accommodation, disability or whatever) rather than simply trying to find some solid answers for a lifetime of questions.