Small Talk...

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Priceless.

Yep! It's called small talk for a good reason.

hehe, nice one
i never ask people how they are. never seen the point of doing that. should it be interesting for me? i see them alive in front of me, they are apparently ok, so why should i ask that? also don't like being asked how i am. i don't think about how i am. all the things in my life are the way they are supposed to be (even if they are bad), i take life the way it is. my answer is always the same: "i've never been better". most people after some time stop asking me how i am, since they know my answer already. however there are some who enjoy asking me that question every time because they are happy to hear somebody so positive

Thanks for the help -- this cartoon oughta come in handy . . .

Nice !

I hate shoptenders saying to me "have a nice day."

I keep walking, or mumble something (or both). Is it a command? Am I required to improve? Do I look that miserable (probably - if I've just spent money)? Will smiling self-consciously at people be enough? How do I know in advance how my day is going to turn out?

By this stage I have ususally walked straight into the exit door, in a state of some distress (and they laugh).


Michaelmas

LOL, I have the same one posted up in my cube at work. I love that site.

I hate how people ask how you are under the pretense of actually wanting to know, and then when you are honest and tell them outright, they swiftly change the subject.. unless you simply say 'Oh great' or 'fine, you?'
Often people ask this just so that the other person returns the question and they can launch into a discussion of their latest love issues etc.

that's SO annoying

This is a scream. It's our literal thinking taking over. When someone asks me how I am, I automatically get defensive and answer "fine" very impatiently. I don't mean to, but it's for the same reason you noted above. I'm standing right there in front of them in once piece, so why are they asking me this stupid question? I have to stop and remind myself that what they said means nothing, and then I get even more frustrated with the fact that most conversations like this are always about nothing!! I love your response, I think I'll start using it myself!!

Hey, I just noticed that you're in Lisbon! I have some friends from Rio who swear that Portugal is a nation of aspies, very literal thinkers and melancholic! What say you? Is there a lot of small talk going on there, or do they tend to discuss weightier topics more than in other countries? Just curious, since Portugal is known for saudade and sadness.

perfect! you'll find out that using that response has also other advantages. but it has to be always the same, you can never change it, never give them hope for change even when i was emotionally down, i never stopped using that and it helped me a bit to put myself together. (after all, how the past, however good it was, could be better than the present, however bad it is? past is gone and therefore not comparable with present)
since i don't ask how people are and they know my response to that question already, some of them ask me that only in case that they have a reason to suppose that something is wrong with me and therefore use that question only with real intention to help.

about the portugal: i don't know. they left me much more alone, than i was in my native country. their empathy is very low. this is actually first time that i, thanks to you, realized that it may be a country of aspies though i think that i hear the chitchat all around more than i heard that in slovakia where i grew up. i think the most people here are just careless. or at least that was what i thought about them until now. will have to think about it

Yeah, give it some thought and let us know! My friends gave me so many funny examples of their literal thinking, like how someone would ask a Portuguese waiter if they had any ketchup, etc. and the waiter would say "yes" and then just stand there, not realizing that they were actually asking them to bring them the ketchup! When I told them that I'd have done the same thing, that's when I started to wonder! Of course, the waiters could just be jerking their customers around for fun. And I'm sure that, Portugal being a Latin country, there's probably a lot of talking and chitchat going on, but I wonder if maybe they still may have the souls (or at least the wiring) of aspies!

lol same.
If you have something screamingly important tell me, and I will do the same.
However sadly, my life isn't much of a drama fest and I don't care to let you in on the crap I did today which half of it I don't remember anyways. There's not point and sorry but I don't care about how you tripped on someone's jacket today - relevance to anything = ?

Sometimes I tolerate it. Form my roommate mostly - its the same I answer either "okay," "mhm" and basic lines like that to the blabbery of her life. Now if she came out with some, "so I've been thinking..." that would be awesome but this is rare. Like when she came back from the Uni after looking up stuff on her MBTI and enneagram she started talking about it and than wow what do you know, conversation pursued.

I swear NTs make up this stuff to hear their own voices. I don't understand any of it and never remember it unless I'm pushed on it. Try looking at them and asking, "Why do you ask that? It isn't as if you really care how all these people are, so why do you ask it?" They can never answser. The best they can come up with is, "I'm being polite" to which I reply, "How is it polite to imply you care how someone is when you clearly don't care?" I'm still waiting for someone to explain to me how it is polite. I still say they just want to hear a voice. These are the same people who leave the television on for noise.