Just found out I can't trust anyone I work with...

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So... prepare for a long story of my woe and heartache... Ah, a little levity goes a long way.

I started working at the company I'm with back in July. This is in the same field I've been in for a few years now, so I have a fair amount of experience. I moved from a company that really had its stuff together to one that... well, let's just say I saw a few opportunities for improvement.

My good ol' aspie self though that these would be good things to bring up to my manager over time. Suggestions, which I now realize came across more as grumbling and complaining. Needless to say, from my perspective the Manager didn't take anything I suggested to heart (even though when other people suggested the exact same thing, the changes were welcome with open arms...)

Then, one day something really upset me. I won't go into too many details, but part of my job involved receiving product back from customers to evaluate for complaints. Well, the product is in bottles, but one customer didn't send back product... they sent back piss. This pee pee bottle was at my desk, I handled it, etc, without knowing this. When I found out I was livid.

I told my manager, and I wasn't too kind. I was very angry. then after two weeks of not perceiving any change, I contacted an outside regulatory body.

A few weeks later, I've realized this to be a very gross overreaction. I should have gone to HR (even though they're so incompetent, they never even got an I-9 form from me, which is needed by law here in the states...), or Health and human services, though in my defense, I didn't even know who those people were, so I had no idea how to escalate.

Anyways. I made the complaint to the regulatory body anonymously, but everyone, including my manager, knows it was me. And now, I've been hearing that people have been saying things behind my back. things like how depressed I am, which is why I "wander the halls"( I do not wander- I take laps during lunch, for fitness because I sit all day) amongst other things.

So, after talking with probably the only person who I can trust, someone who has been kind in watching out for me, in a non-overbearing fashion, I'm going to try to apologize to my manager. Maybe, just maybe I can get some trust(which I doubt, because my manager never trusted me in the first place). The problem is, some of my co-workers are making things more difficult for me, and I can't tell who it is.

So, in conclusion, I can't trust my coworkers. I really wish I could understand this office politics stuff, but to no avail. My Asperger's/ASD has been very helpful in my job, especially the repetitive parts, but the negatives could unfortunately cost me any sort of advancement, maybe even my job.

Anyone else experience anything like this? Want to chide me for being silly? Any comments? It would really help me feel better right now. Thanks.

Who sent you the urine in the bottle? Was it a customer? In what way is the company responsible for that? Maybe I'm missing something (I mean that...I could be "missing something"....) Did the company not support you when you mentioned it?

I'm thinking that you can't blame the company for a customer sending back a bottle of urine. Like I said, I'm sensing that you sensed "non-support" on the part of the company--which is, perhaps, why you reported them to the other agency.

Bosses hate it when you "go over their head." Especially to an outside regulatory agency. This could lead to fines and other punishments for the company, as well as the boss getting fired. This is why you are being treated the way you are being treated now.

It's not nice. And it's not proper, either. But it's reality.

Sorry, I should clarify - my concern was that this issue had happened before, and instead of handling customer samples in an area more like a lab, we were handling samples at our office desks. Granted we were given gloves, but if anything spilled? Imagine that stuff in the carpets.

The bottle was indeed from a customer. The company wasn't responsible for that. No way they could have known. I was just frustrated that there wasn't a more controlled environment to receive stuff from the customer in such case they send us something really bas (like poison...).

The result of everything is that now we have this area in place... and everyone hates me... guess I should have known what to expect.

Since the problem has been resolved, you were able to get what you wanted---which was safety for yourself and others.

I feel that, in time, at least some of the anger/irritation will dissipate. Perhaps, at least some people will acquire a newfound respect for you.

I hope so.

I learned that there's nothing I can personally do to make things better without management involvement. Going to outside agencies to solve sever problems is not the answer (or at least, things I perceive as severe).

I do feel bad for in some instances making people's work harder. Now they have to take a little trek to the lab area to handle samples. I just didn't want anyone to get injured by something.

It just really hurt when I found out that even before that, people were saying very untrue things behind my back. The incident just made it worse. I just wish I could really perceive the right way to do things in the moment, rather than by hindsight.

I went to an outside source on a safety matter and I was fired. Whistleblower is what it is called. I'm trying to put it all behind me, but it was traumatic.

When anything happens at work, just make sure you go through the ranks of management. Never go to the next higher up until you have exhausted all efforts with the person below them. Go through the "chain of command".

It is likely that the few laws designed to protect whistleblowers will be eroded in the next few years.

I definitely don't consider myself a whistleblower... there's been no real action taken against me. I just had no clue where to elevate my issue to. The next person up is on the other side of the country (I'm in NY, they're in CA).

I guess this post was just a partial rant/pity party because I know this could have been handled better, my perception in the moment wasn't right, but there's some justification for it all in the mess of things since my serious, sincere concern would have been lost under the pile of everyone else's concerns.

It's a mess.. what can I say?

You might consider asking about such issues on the work forum on Wrong Planet before taking action. We may be able to help you take the most appropriate course of action based on our cumulative work experience. Sometimes the problem is just a simple misunderstanding that we may be able to clear up for you online so you don't have to embarrass yourself or a co-worker.

Sometimes we get fooled by lies. NTs know they are lies be we don't .

Thank you BTDT, I will definitely do that next time.

Since this had happened before, and was in any case a possibility, it was your employer's responsibility to make that escalation process known, and procedures and protections for hazards ought to have been documented to death - to be air-tight and exhaustive. It was wrong of them not to have the appropriate procedure, and it was wrong of them not to make it clear how to escalate.

Perhaps it was dealt with much more efficiently (ignoring how much it aggravated them) because the complaint was external. Internally, they'd probably just have fobbed you off, going by your description and personal experience.

From my stranger's point of view, I don't see much for you to apologise to your manager for.

As for people making it part of their social routine to talk about the one who seems most depressed or detached or just unusual? That was inevitable. Groups of people have next to nothing substantial to say to one another, and paying negative attention to the out-group is a reliable, easy source of pointless conversation. If only workplaces were groups of people collected together from genuine collective interest in something, this might not be so much the case.

You need to find a new job quickly, while you can still get references. You will not be able to repair your reputation with this employer, they will not trust you now.

I agree with androbot1 that you will need to start looking for work sooner than later. As a former whistle-blower, you need to plan ahead before the door closes completely shut on your career.

In my case, I was forced to turn in an employer to the state and federal authorities as the management wanted to conduct illegal dumping of laboratory chemicals, even after I notified the entire chain of command that it was illegal to do. If caught after the fact, they were going to try to pin it on me, but I had been collecting evidence (photos, video, documents, etc.) on their intentions. I even had three of them on tape (it is legal to do so where I was at) saying that they were going to do a chemical dump "whether or not I liked it" because it was too expensive to pay for the proper disposal.

The state inspected them, fined them initially and made them pay for the proper disposal (instead of the fines that they would have been charged with). The state inspector had never seen such dangerous levels of hazardous chemicals stored in one room (that was the fault of the management, not me). The final tally was over a ton of high hazards (including explosives, extreme toxics and radioactives) for the disposal that the management wanted to "haul to the dump" before they got turned in. The state uses some of my evidence photos for chemical safety training programs. In the end, I did lose my job over this issue. But, I had planned ahead and moved on to a higher paying position with people who follow the laws. My previous employer is still in existence, but a mere shell of what it used to be.

Thank you for the feedback. Wow! That's a crazy story!

I think I've managed to patch things up for now. I promised my manager I wouldn't circumvent her again. I also found out people were saying things behind my back. Things like I "wander the halls" at work, when all I'm doing is taking some laps during my lunch break (which is my right by law).

But you're right. It's time to work somewhere else. At least things should hold together here (I hope) in the meanwhile. I've also saved a lot of money, so if it comes down to it, I could leave immediately. Though, it looks better to go into a job right away than having a chunk of time off.

I've had a similar experience. Many people are incompetent and do not care about the companies efficiency.
Management don't want to know about problems.
I used to fight for efficiency and even ask for simple solitions to staff irritations. Completely ignored, they come to see me as a trouble maker, someone who is above their position.
Even when something was drastically improved they don't want to admit it or give any credit or thanks.
It is better to point out one problem to management, give them time to work on it (even if it is a bad employee).
Try a second time with a different issue. (A second chance)
Even put it in writing so they cannot be confused about what you're saying;
*Your concern.
*Why you are concerned about this.
*Improvements that will be made for the company once this issue is addressed.

They may be concerned or busy with other issues you're not aware of.
Becareful to work there for a year before bringing up your concerns - they may not trust you before this time, they may feel you do not understand the company well enough.
Some people are lazy and just don't want to change.
Sometimes the owner/CEO are friends with other managers, and do not want to believe they are problematic or believe anything they say over you.
Do not get very passionate or angry if issues are not addressed, be subtle.
Do leave. Or just be prepared to work at an inefficient company.
You can complain to upper management or authorities (if it won't jepardise references) once you have references or have left.
(Do it after you have secured stable employment - they may not even suspect you 6-12 months after the fact).
You can also tell them honestly that your concerns are not being addressed once you have quit. Some people are extremely petty and will make up any reason to fire you on before you last day is up, even a few hours before your shift on your last day. Don't be too critical;
Instead of saying:
"Sam is a manager that does not listen to problems I brought up."
Say:
"I do not feel efficiency/safety concerns are taken seriously by management."
As for your work colleagues - they start rumours about everyone, its a way of making themselves look good or even hiding the fact that they are the lazy ones. They'll often be buddy buddy with managers (never saying a bad word about them, unless it comes to the day where they wish to take that managers position and they release the bad information they've collected over the years).