What Are Your Aspie Fears And How Many Of You Share My Own?
1) Afraid of the future and the passing of time as it could bring bad things to my life
2) Afraid of losing my parents (as I’d be devastated and struggle to cope without them)
3) Afraid of depression/anxiety as it can almost mentally incapacitate me for a while and I’m holding back tears
4) Afraid of growing old or seeing those I know or care about grow old.
5) Afraid of rejection/failure as it makes me feel inadequate and hits my self-esteem
6) Afraid of being alone or uncared for (women aren’t supposed to love me and I struggle making new friends)
7) Afraid of obsessive or self-destructive thoughts that cause chaos in my mind
8.) Afraid of forgetting things and losing my memory (as I live for the things that were once great in my life)
9) Afraid of attractive women (as I know how my unwanted hypersexual side will perceive them and create problems for me)
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RDOS: Final version 3- Neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 101 of 200. Neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 141 of 200
AQ Test- 29. RAADS-R Test- 72
I haven't been Dx so my fears might be unfounded , my biggest fear at the moment is being Dx Aspie if I'm not and vice versa , basically I want to know what's wrong me but I not sure that's a simple answer. As for sharing your fears
1) Nope
2) Nope
3) I'm living it every day so nope
4) I am old so nope
5) If I'm honest maybe a little afraid of rejection ( it's easy to avoid situations like that though )
6) I'm not single but still don't fear being alone ( crave it sometimes , so I can just let myself go )
7) Hell Yeah
I wondered why you had a dot after the eight ( it was bugging me )Nope , If I forget something it's not like I'll remember what I've forgotten
9) Nope
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Hypocrisy is the greatest luxury. Raise the double standard
1) Afraid of the future and the passing of time as it could bring bad things to my life
I feel that time is passing by too quickly, and I do often worry about what's to come and what my future will hold.
2) Afraid of losing my parents (as I’d be devastated and struggle to cope without them)
Me too. My mum has cancer, and although she's in remission there is still a chance it could come back (as the doctors have said that it's 'incurable'). I am so scared of losing my mum, or any of my family.
3) Afraid of depression/anxiety as it can almost mentally incapacitate me for a while and I’m holding back tears
My emotions rule me, even though I'm on antidepressants. And most people don't understand how daunting some things are when you have anxiety.
4) Afraid of growing old or seeing those I know or care about grow old.
I suppose it's inevitable, as everything, even your own inanimate possessions, are growing old as we speak. But growing old is so gradual that you won't really notice it until way after it's happened, then by then you will probably have accepted it.
5) Afraid of rejection/failure as it makes me feel inadequate and hits my self-esteem
I'm afraid of rejection too. I was always rejected through my teenage years by friends I could of had. Now I'm anxious about getting too close to people in case they think I'm being nosy or clingy.
6) Afraid of being alone or uncared for (women aren’t supposed to love me and I struggle making new friends)
This worries me too. I do have a boyfriend but he is 20 years older than me and won't stop smoking, so I do get so anxious of him having a heart attack from smoking too much. When I try to tell him, he just says I'm going on too much about it. I don't think I could go back to single life again. I struggle at making friends too.
7) Afraid of obsessive or self-destructive thoughts that cause chaos in my mind
I am worried that if a loved one dies, I might not deal with it and it might ruin my state of mind. I'm already emotionally fragile. I have the urge to burst into tears when I'm spoken to in a confrontational tone at work. I can't help it. So a big loss in my life probably will tip me over the edge.
8.) Afraid of forgetting things and losing my memory (as I live for the things that were once great in my life)
If you mean Dementia, yes I'm afraid of that too. I work with people on the Dementia spectrum, and some of them are so frightened and confused. It must be awful to think that they are young and busy with work and family life, when in reality they are elderly and have lost their memory and other important parts of their brain and need to be cared for and locked in a care home. It is so sad.
9) Afraid of attractive women (as I know how my unwanted hypersexual side will perceive them and create problems for me)
I'm afraid of attractive women too, although not in the same way as you.
Because I don't wear make-up, I feel that women who do wear make-up judge me and I get unconfident. I do wish make-up was never invented so that women didn't have the social pressure to have to wear it.
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Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity
“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman
So I don't have those 'fears' But I already had a screwed sense of fear to begin with:
1) I'm a witness. Therefore, I appreciate whenever time passes by for the better or for worse.
2) I love my mom so much, I'd wish for her to outlive me. But whether time is involved or not, I can always let go for I feel like I already have more than a fill from her.
3) I overcame anxiety and depression few years ago. It doesn't influence my present life, whether it's the past or future. If it comes, I know what I will do with it.
4) I accepted time and death as it is. And so much, that I'm waiting to grow old and die already.
5) I lost the concept of 'worthy' and 'unworthy', the concept of 'strong' and 'weak'. I lost the desire for validation and appreciation for I already had enough of it, that I would rather be rejected or ignored.
6) I treasure solidarity above company for the former is a rare luxury in my current life.
7) I cannot fear this. Because I'm bored. And, I appreciate chaos in a way.
I already learned long time ago that forgetting is more or less of a gift.. And an annoyance. That remembering everything could hurt more. So I lost my fear of forgetting.
9) I'm a woman myself. And if people are having ideas, I'm asexual.
And because of that, I'm so bored of life.
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I'm afraid of attractive women too, although not in the same way as you.
Because I don't wear make-up, I feel that women who do wear make-up judge me and I get unconfident. I do wish make-up was never invented so that women didn't have the social pressure to have to wear it.
If it makes you feel better, I like it when women have little or no make-up. It's one of the reasons I prefer Chinese make-up to Japanese make-up. The Chinese style makes it look natural, like they were born with it. The Japanese style looks chaotic and it goes overboard. I find very few women attractive. I'm not asexual, I'm still heterosexual, but I have less of those thoughts than the average guy. I personally find innocence and clumsiness attractive.
As for me:
1. One of my badly dreamt-up social interactions coming true
>I sometimes play social interactions in my mind, some of them are good, others are bad. If a bad one were to come true, I'd be devastated.
2. Being forced to work in a group.
>I dislike teamwork, I can do most things on my own with little issues.
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Just counting down the time til' I can get outta here and the journey begins.
The only thing I'm genuinely afraid of is losing the people I care about the most. For instance, my best friend. He's been an immense help at the less happy times - more so than even my parents.
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“They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same.”
― Kurt Cobain
2) Afraid of losing my parents (as I’d be devastated and struggle to cope without them)
3) Afraid of depression/anxiety as it can almost mentally incapacitate me for a while and I’m holding back tears
4) Afraid of growing old or seeing those I know or care about grow old.
5) Afraid of rejection/failure as it makes me feel inadequate and hits my self-esteem
6) Afraid of being alone or uncared for (women aren’t supposed to love me and I struggle making new friends)
7) Afraid of obsessive or self-destructive thoughts that cause chaos in my mind
8.) Afraid of forgetting things and losing my memory (as I live for the things that were once great in my life)
9) Afraid of attractive women (as I know how my unwanted hypersexual side will perceive them and create problems for me)
First off, why do you label yourself as hopeless? Only two thirds of your nickname are true, that you're an Aspie and a guy. I'm afraid of a lot of the same things you are like growing old, losing my parents (especially my dad), self-destructive thoughts, and losing my memory. However, I do have hope for the future because I'm planning on moving out of the nursing home I'm in now and into my own apartment.
I feel closest to my dad out of everyone else in my family, which is why I said that I'm especially afraid of losing him. I don't know what I would do without him to be honest. He's my only support and encouragement right now. My mom is supportive, too, but isn't doing too well as far as her health is concerned. She's already 70 years old and still smokes at least 2 packs of cigarettes a day. She also has epilepsy, hypoglycemia and back problems. To me, it seems like she's more just existing than living. I think she'll agree with me on that.
When you mentioned being afraid of attractive women, that reminded me of how I feel about myself, that I'm TOO attractive. What I mean by that is that I always seem to attract the wrong kind of men, those who are abusive, controlling and take advantage of me. Why can't I get a good guy for once? Oh well, it's not that important to me right now. I'm not looking for a relationship anyway. And when you said that you have a hypersexual side, does that mean you get horny easily or are you having a lot of sex or what? How is it unwanted? I think some women like that in a man. I do, at least. Sorry, TMI? Ok, well now you and probably a lot of other people know about my sexuality. I've already mentioned in another post of mine that I have a dirty mind. Ok, I hope this helped you. Try not to let your fears get to you. It'll be okay.
1) Afraid of the future and the passing of time as it could bring bad things to my life
Yeah, how could I not be? I see nothing good coming from more passage of time, in my life or for what I care about outside my own life (animals, environment).
2) Afraid of losing my parents (as I’d be devastated and struggle to cope without them)
Most definitely.
3) Afraid of depression/anxiety as it can almost mentally incapacitate me for a while and I’m holding back tears
No. Not prone to depression, anxiety is life long companion.
4) Afraid of growing old or seeing those I know or care about grow old.
Yes.
5) Afraid of rejection/failure as it makes me feel inadequate and hits my self-esteem
Not really.
6) Afraid of being alone or uncared for (women aren’t supposed to love me and I struggle making new friends)
Yes, but I don't need romantic love, just love, and I'm not looking for friendships. Friends are just like and no substitute for love (family, pets, partner).
7) Afraid of obsessive or self-destructive thoughts that cause chaos in my mind
No.
8.) Afraid of forgetting things and losing my memory (as I live for the things that were once great in my life)
No, my long term memory is good, so it doesn't seem likely. I kinda wish there was a new generation in my family (as in own kids or siblings' kids) to tell these memories to so important memories would go down in family history for a while.
9) Afraid of attractive women (as I know how my unwanted hypersexual side will perceive them and create problems for me)
Female here, but no, I'm not afraid of attractive people. I'm asexual and close to aromantic, and as indifferent to attractive people as I am to the unattractive ones.
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2) Afraid of losing my parents (as I’d be devastated and struggle to cope without them)
3) Afraid of depression/anxiety as it can almost mentally incapacitate me for a while and I’m holding back tears
4) Afraid of growing old or seeing those I know or care about grow old.
5) Afraid of rejection/failure as it makes me feel inadequate and hits my self-esteem
6) Afraid of being alone or uncared for (women aren’t supposed to love me and I struggle making new friends)
7) Afraid of obsessive or self-destructive thoughts that cause chaos in my mind
8.) Afraid of forgetting things and losing my memory (as I live for the things that were once great in my life)
9) Afraid of attractive women (as I know how my unwanted hypersexual side will perceive them and create problems for me)
First off, why do you label yourself as hopeless? Only two thirds of your nickname are true, that you're an Aspie and a guy.
And when you said that you have a hypersexual side, does that mean you get horny easily or are you having a lot of sex or what? How is it unwanted? I think some women like that in a man. I do, at least. Sorry, TMI? Ok, well now you and probably a lot of other people know about my sexuality. I've already mentioned in another post of mine that I have a dirty mind.
'Hopeless' was originally in reference to my luck and ability with women (when I allowed myself to try and have one). Now I guess it's more my general state of mind.
As for the hypersexual side, it's typically intensely sexual thoughts or feelings regarding the things that part of me wants, big and wide things like hips, thighs, bums and boobs typically on women of legal age right up to 70's, as well as sexual and fetish ideas But it is something I'm ashamed and afraid of as it just seems inappropriate and I feel I go too far with it, even in comparison to others who claim to be hypersexual (which might just mean a craving for normal sex). I don't think many women appreciate an overly sexual guy, they already have to deal with enough from guys as is.
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RDOS: Final version 3- Neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 101 of 200. Neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 141 of 200
AQ Test- 29. RAADS-R Test- 72
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