idonthaveanickname wrote:
I just try to avoid social situations. Now I try to think before I speak or act. I'm still not clear on social cues, though. Is it similar to nonverbal communication? Am I supposed to tell what other people are trying to tell me without them actually saying anything? Is that what social cues are?
Yes you are supposed to... :/ Yes that's what social cues are. It can be implicit in verbal communication or it can be nonverbal signals. They are just guiding signals for social behaviour.
I don't know why people can't just be direct and say certain things instead of being that implicit in their (verbal) communication...
Well, ok, I get it that part of it is that some people find directness hard to deal with, finding it too aggressive due to whatever sensitivities they may have. And so I suppose such socially expected indirectness is a means to decrease chance of conflict overall which is good for social cooperation.
It's just that I don't work that way, I don't find directness too aggressive, I just find it normal assertive and perfectly fine to deal with without having to create conflict. So it's going to be a bit annoying having to try and adjust to people with this by toning down myself after I recently read up on this topic. Trying to learn though.
Of course, there are other reasons too for being implicit. Such as, some topics are a bit sensitive in the sense that they are not for the public. There is such a thing as a private sphere. (I get this one just fine without needing any explanation.)
And then for the nonverbal aspect, some things are just better expressed nonverbally. Quicker than saying it, and whatnot. Because it's also kind of implicit information in the first place if it's, say, about expressing a mood. At least that's how I see it.