Why am I maturing slowly?

Post Reply New Topic

I am currently 19 years old and still behaving as a child in many ways. For instance my curiosity that tends to become unprofessional and my poor ability to manage my emotions which influences me both negatively and positively. When I observe people (of my age) I see that they are very mature in how they behave and their interests. Most tend to be fairly assertive and have grown out of the phase of being a child. I have not and I'm not sure why. It's causing me a lot of problems.

When I began university at the age of 18 I dropped out because I was simply immature. I couldn't manage my emotions which interfered with my ability to stay in control and be productive, everyone else managed to get the work done and stay emotionally stable, but I couldn't. Parts of me simply have not grown.

What should I do about this? I can't tolerate criticism, poor attitudes, stress and mental illness because I was never taught how to deal with them. Cognitively I feel as a child and I'm also behaving as one (my social skills corresponds to the level of a child).

I'm gonna study either Aerospace Engineering or Medical physics (possibly physics instead). I always feel as if I won't make it because of how underdeveloped my brain is. I have been interested in Physics (mostly space) my entire life and I do have a genuine interest in mathematics. Still feel inept, because of how "childish" I am. I'm afraid of failing again because of my inability to deal with my emotions, the stress would kill me.

I've also been delayed and "younger than I really am" all my life.

I've just suddenly remembered my mother commenting on that in my presence when I was a kid, saying that I wasn't as "old" as other kids my age.

From what's been said by people here and elsewhere, it goes with being autistic. Even high-functioning autistic people often have delayed emotional development. I'm well beyond the age when you can start being considered an adult, but strongly suspect that my emotional side is probably around that of a 12 year old. It's what goes on in my head that's helped me, due to experience, to control it and act a little closer to my actual age.

This may be something you'll have to deal with over time. It's sometimes called "developing coping mechanisms".

I did note, tho', that you said something about mental illness.

Autism itself is NOT a mental illness. It's a neurological condition. BIG difference between those two things.

Do you also have something else going on besides autism?

Im actually in the same boat as you!

As i type this im wearing a sonic costume and watching Sonic X. I buy action figures and plushies, i watch cartoons, i like playgrounds ( it kills me that im not allowed in the mcdonalds playground anymore, i will sometimes eat there at night and go in the play in the playground when there is no children there.) im 20 And im still a virgin. Not working, not going to school. Laugh at things considered "immature" for my age. My dad has to pesture me to brush my hair and wash my clothes.

Hello,
Don't let immaturity get you down, or steer you away from your goals academically. I recommend being hyper focused on your studies, and just be glad you know what you want to do with your life. Some of us can't figure that out for years.

As far as maturity goes, i am immature and I'm 47 years old. I even look like I'm under 30 still. I think were just wired with emotional instability, and its just something we have to learn to deal with. I personally needed medication for irritability and anger, and i've improved with emotional outbursts because of it. Good luck to you and i hope your able to get back to your studies.

Interesting... to be honest I think I must be on the opposite side of the spectrum.

For instance I am only 15, even though I enjoy listening to lectures about economics and politics in my spare time, and really wish I could just get High School over with and go to a university already. I'm generally quite tolerant with others and good with criticism, which also seems to be quite opposed to your situation, no offense intended. For example, when someone even tried to pull off bullying on me, I just used humor at my own expense and soon the would be bully and me were friendly acquaintances. Also, while I know this must sound really narcissistic, I can't really relate to others my age and feel like they are just... well, a little too "simple" and immature for me, if that makes any sense.

At first I thought this was because of my autism, and that other people with it may feel the same as me, although this thread seems to put a pretty big hole in that idea. Well, anyways, best of luck to you and I hope that your maturity problem may solve itself swiftly!

I think I know what you mean. I'm 23 and I consistently feel four years younger than my actual age. I think of myself as 19, and hate when I am asked my age in everyday life. I just started college in the fall and am only starting to feel like an adult. My interests aren't particularly young for my age, as I watch a lot of adult shows. The music I listen to might be considered young for my age. I went to a concert a couple of years ago for one of my favorite singers and was among the older fans there.

I feel pretty much like a child whose body grew too fast. I have no idea how to act around people my age, I don't know how to deal with situations and I'm very confused about my feelings.

I meant to post this yesterday but the day got ahead of me. I'm biologically 16, emotionally probably 8, and sensory-wise maybe 5 but it's such a struggle because I'm intellectually in my 20's but the executive functioning difficulties make me seem less responsible than my 10 year old brother. Also I have Cerebral Palsy which makes it hard to tell how behind I really am because there is so much that I can't physically do (I use a wheelchair). This also makes it harder to get the diagnosed with ASD not to mention the fact that I'm a girl so I'll be lucky to be diagnosed by the time I'm 80