PLEASE HELP ME (SERIOUS)

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I'm suffering from this:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Primari ... e_disorder

About 7-8 years ago I was taking some supplements to treat my autism, and it like, made it too easy to inhibit my emotional compass or something. All I want is absolute assurance that I would never hurt myself or others. What should I do?

I wish I can help, but I can't help myself right now. There other very smart people on here.

That sounds like an incredibly distressing disorder, constantly being filled with doubt about yourself and then anxiety over said doubt must be quite a devastating cycle. I honestly wish I could help, but I doubt I could. If you want assurance however, I do highly doubt that just because you think you are capable of doing harm, doesn't mean that you will. Thinking of an action and carrying out that action are two very different things from one another, and one often doesn't lead to the other. This is undoubtedly even more true in your case, where (if I'm understanding it right) you have little to no control over what thoughts pop up in your head.

First of all DC , take a deep breath and try and relax.

If you do have POCD then I believe you are in a category of people that are least likely to act on their impulsive thoughts especially if it involves hurting others , however I think it does puts you in a category of people most likely to self harm so you need to get professional help as soon as you can.

I know there are a few members here with OCD so they may be able to put your mind at ease but only a professional can really help.

A professional should work through this disorder with you if that is an option. If not, one thing they will likely do is teach you to accept the anxiety. This would be done in a controlled manner however. Gradually and carefully you will expose yourself to a tolerable level of anxiety and then learn to accept it. Don't try to suppress it as that will only make it worse. Over a period of time, taking small steps and being able to handle the anxiety through each step you will build tolerance. There are ways this can go wrong however which is why professional guidance and oversight is highly recommended.

I have gotten help for this. The thing is, the parts of my brain that control bias are just so burnt out that the only thing I can fo to let them heal is to just shut them off and let them rest. The only problem is that it makes it feel like there's nothing to protect me from bad compulsions

I doubt your symptoms are related to using supplements but regardless, your best course of action would be to seek professional treatment. OCD is a highly treatable condition and speaking to an experienced professional can be very reassuring.

I've dealt with OCD in many forms since I was seven years old, including POCD. I've received therapy and currently take fluoxetine (Prozac) in a liquid form which helps a lot with the symptoms as well as my general mood and anxiety symptoms.

People with OCD are the least likely to act out on whatever thoughts they are having. You are not your thoughts and they do not control you, nor does having them make you a bad person.

You are not your thoughts and they do not control you, nor does having them make you a bad person.[/quote] (NikNak)

I have often had the awful displeasure of horrible intrusive thoughts and have wondered whether or not they are a form of OCD or not and to what degree; after reading the article you provided DaneClark I am under the impression that POCD is what I have been struggling with for years...

In any event, I think it has gotten better and does, when I remind myself that those thoughts are: intrusive, unwanted and utterly detestable to me, and therefore they aren't me.

You say "PLEASE HELP ME (SERIOUS)"
and I am not a psychiatrist or psychologist,
and do not have much experience in
dealing with what you're describing,
so what I can and will do is
pray for your healing.

I hope you will feel better soon.

I'd really like to believe that I would be more likely to harm myself than someone else if it weren't for one thing: One time when I was 13 I hit a cat with a stick because of a compulsion. And I'm normally someone who loves animals. I felt really really bad about it afterwards. Luckily the cat didn't get hurt but the compulsions that led to it were no different than the compulsions I still get nowadays. It was the only time I ever did something like that but it's still enough for it to scare me.

It should be noted that the cat incident happened way back before I had any real experience with this kind of thing, and while I have self inflicted minor harm on myself in the past it always happened during periods of my life when I was suffering from severe anxiety. I'm just worried because I'm in a state where I need to shut off parts of my brain so they can heal and all of the tools I used to use to combat these things are located in the areas I need to shut off

Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) CBT works quite effectively for this mental disorder. Essentially everytime you seek reassurance which is a compulsion, your anxiety will be worse the next time as will your urge to seek reassurance. Each time you consciously refuse to ask for reassurance even though you want to and each time you force yourself to endure the anxiety it provokes, the next time it will be a little bit easier and will provoke a little less anxiety.

Anxiety disorders are either getting better because you are working on them or they are getting worse because you are either avoiding, or giving into compulsions. You can work with a CBT therapist who is experienced with using ERP to treat patients with OCD and it's various forms.

I suffer from OCD and have overcome compulsive hoarding and compulsive checking with this treatment. It is still a struggle with compulsive handwashing and I still do have the ocassional compulsions to check or hoard but I have the tools to better manage my conditions so that they don't have as much of a hold of my life as they once did.

It is expensive , but book a consult call with the guy who owns this site:

Selfhacked.com.

His name is joe cohen and he is a genius. Degree in psychology, and he has helped tons of people with niche conditions like yours.

I had a call with him, and he told me exactly what to do. So far his advice is helping.

I've given it alot of thiught, but it's basically like this: in order for the big tangled mess of burnt out and glitch pathways in my head to heal, I need to keep my brain in the absolute most neutral state possible for awhile, but at the same time I also need to be able to have enough sentiment polarity to not want to do harm to myself or others and to still be able to make use of nuances associated with important things like family