Wet hands

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Hi I just made this account I lurk this forum from time to time as I think I may be on the autism spectrum but I am not sure and I can't just say I am unless I have some sort of official statement so I remain neutral on my stance there.

anywho, I feel like one "point" against me having autism is that I do not have sensory issues that are a problem, I have smells I don't like but I can tolerate them and I don't have food textures I can't handle. but one thing that I constantly have issues with are my hands, I hate washing them I hate getting them wet in general I will avoid doing the dishes for multiple days unless I have gloves I can wear because the agony I will be in post dish washing makes the entire experience for me unbearable. and I don't have much for solutions, I will apply lotion sometimes after I wash my hands and dry them but that only helps 20% of the time. the biggest issue too is I dont want to touch ANYTHING after i've gotten my hands wet because everything feels like sandpaper and its so unbearable.

anyway rant aside does anyone else have these issues with their hands? what do you do to help mitigate the pain that ensues

Hi & welcome . From what you’ve written, though you currently don’t know if you’re on the spectrum or not, you you clearly have sensory sensitivities.

Sounds like you’re finding ways around it, via using gloves when doing dishes, using hand cream etc. It remains an issue for you though, so your options are either to continue as you’ve been doing … acknowledging, accepting & avoiding … though eventually doing dishes OR gentle, gradual desensitisation. Just about any sensitivity can be overcome, but the person with the issue needs to want to overcome it. Hence, the Occupational Therapist existing.

You could look up methods online, if you’re wanting to ease the issue.

It’s not unusual to have wet hand issues. I’m very familiar with it.

Yes I think it could be an ASD-related sensory issue, though you'd need more than that for a positive diagnosis of course.

I dislike having wet hands but I don't seem to much mind washing them. There are confounding factors - I play a guitar that has heavy-gauge steel strings so don't want the water to soften my finger ends or they'll hurt when I play. Somehow I often get minor cuts on my hands which makes me wary of picking up an infection if the water isn't clean. I don't like putting my hands into cold, dirty dishwater so I don't use a bowl, I put the dishes in the sink and turn the hot tap on them to pre-rinse them and to warm the water before I start, and I use a long-handled dish brush.

I avoid filling the sink with so many dishes that it gets hard to wash them without dipping my hands into anything undesirable. To keep the dishes down I have simple meals and food preparation procedures that don't dirty many dishes and utensils. I can't be bothered much with gloves because it's a bit more work, and gloves reduce my dexterity, but I'll use them as a fallback if I have to deal with a dishwashing situation that doesn't meet my fussy requirements. That's much more common when I have cohabitees - there's a limit to how much pressure I'm prepared to put onto others to comply with my strange wishes.

All this might make it seem like I have quite a problem with that particular sensory issue, but I don't see it as particularly severe. If I have to forego my requirements then I do so without coming to any great harm, but I'm a great one for maximising my comfort, and I don't feel very guilty about that. I've seen people accept all kinds of stressful, crappy things as a way of life, and I think that tends to make them unhappy. I often wonder why they do it. It's as if I'm a cat and they're all dogs.

I have the same exact issue with getting my hands wet. I actually don't mind getting them wet, but I hate how dry they feel after I dry them off. It's like I have to use an exorbitant amount of lotion to get it to go away, so I avoid getting my hands wet. I honestly just have to power through it and make sure I have lotion on hand. I also try to rinse my hands with cold water if I have to wash them, because I noticed that rinsing with cold water at the end of a shower made my skin feel less dry, and it does help a tiny bit when I have to get my hands wet.

The pandemic must have been awkward for you, with all that hand washing.

Hmm.....would it help to add olive oil to the hand soap? I suppose you'd have to experiment with the proportions, as too much oil would probably stop the soap from working. There's also that hand-sanitiser stuff they love so much these days, which doesn't "require" rinsing at all, but I've never used it myself, as it's mostly alcohol which would probably make things even worse for you. As a substitute for those horrible chemical hand cleaning products I use cooking oil directly on my hands, followed by ordinary soap without rinsing in between, but rinsing afterwards of course. That cleans my hands quite well, and I noticed it didn't make them feel dry like the chemicals did. Ironically I hate the feel of grease on my hands if I eat greasy food with them, but clean olive oil doesn't bother me as long as I don't leave tons of it on my hands. Hope this doesn't sound too muddled. It's hard to describe these things clearly in words but doing them is easy.

I hate getting my hands wet too.
I can swim, shower, or bathe, but I can't stand touching water with just my hands.
I lose my normal sensory awareness in the water.
It's nasty and feels wrong.
I hate getting the temperature right (dishes).
I hate thinking I might touch something gross (fish tank, river).
I hate having to find a clean hand towel and moisturise.
I can't use those air blower things.
My hands get dry very easily and the whole thing is like a nightmare.

Covid handwashing was a no, and I can't wear gloves.
I used Thieves instead of the alcohol-based sanitisers because I can't do scents either.

I'm a sensory freak.

Obviously we cannot give you diagnosis, but a couple of online quizzes that might interest you:
=>- Autism-Spectrum Quotient Test (AQ)
=>- Aspie-Quiz ^{Registering is optional!}

They cannot give you a diagnosis, either, but could help double-check your suspicions.

I've always loved water, it's the soap or anything that gives water a greasy, unnatural feel that I hate.
I have to wear rubber gloves when I wash dishes because the feel of the dishwashing liquid and bits of food floating around is really gross.

I much prefer washing my hands with foaming hand soap than the regular liquid stuff that doesn't foam well even when your rubbing your hands really hard.

When I'm out in public I usually sanitize my hands several times because I cannot stand germs or sick people. I'll take a shopping cart and wonder to myself "Did the person who last use this have covid or the flu?" or if I sit down somewhere "Did the person who last sit here have covid or the flu? Did they have norovirus? Did they have freaking Ebola for all I know?" And then when I come home I wash my hands just to get rid of the three layers of sanitizer and whatever germs survived. I don't really have OCD or anything, I only have to wash my hands once to make them feel clean and when I'm home, which is most of the time, I feel "safe". It's when I'm in public around others that my health anxieties go up.

Just to clarify yes I do wash my hands, especially after being out.
Sometimes you've gotta do what you don't like to do.

I keep Thieves in my bag when I'm out so I don't have to use store sanitisers.
It's waterless.

When I was little I used to love hand-washing my dolly clothes in dish soap.
I loved the bubbles.
Somehow I got this aversion over time.
I'm noticing more and more how touch-averse I am with various textures.

I took the first test and scored a 39. I was annoyed by all the questions about numbers. I notice when a license plate on a car is from another province or even another country, but I could never remember the number. Sometimes I even forget my own phone number. But then again, I don't *usually* call myself at home.

I lost Aspie points on the numbers questions too. The counsellor who scored them remarked, "you scored high enough but there must be something funny going on with you about numbers that doesn't fit." I think the AQ test is too quick-and-dirty anyway, and that it's not as good as it's cracked up to be. It's only meant as a cheap initial screening tool but I see a way in which it can easily cause genuine Aspies to be denied access to a proper diagnosis.

This is my Aspie-Quiz from a few years ago.



I usually get 49/50 on the Aspie Quiz.
They did one as part of my diagnosis but it was only one test in a 12 hour assessment.

I'm formally diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder in my ASD report and also by an OT.
That explains my exaggerated sensory response to so many random things.

^
I know those screening tests aren't said to be diagnostic, but in your case they look pretty convincing. I've never seen one as extreme before. I was about halfway between the ASD-NT borderline and 100% ASD according to my diagnostician, which kind of fits the way I feel - definitely Aspie but with a neurotypical ghost in the machine.

Yea i've taken these tests before multiple times and I routinely do honestly... but even if all these tests can go "hey man you've got pretty high odds" I still don't feel comfortable putting all my eggs in one basket until I know officially. thank you though ( I had to remove the links because im a new user)

Ha.

"Extreme" is putting it mildly. Sometimes it's fun to be very ND (especially the synaesthesia), but it's also very stressful. I don't think or behave like other people and never have, so it's hard to form relationships or communicate productively without meltdowns and shutdowns. I've spent most of my life self-gaslighting, calling myself a "freak of nature", and managing complex trauma related to sensory overwhelm, interpersonal exploitation, fear, and innate shame.

Well, if the tests support your suspicions and you would like to know officially it would seem the next step is to get an assessment.

However, how to proceed varies by country and age group. If you give a little more information the folk here might have some useful insights for you.

After reading about Autism on the Internet I had strong suspicions that I might be on the Autism Spectrum and it was the AQ test that convinced me my suspicions quite well might be right. But my symptoms are mild and I thought it was possible I was either almost on the Spectrum or barely on the Spectrum...and I wanted to know. That's when I arranged to get an Adult Autism Assessment.