Question for Nonverbals...

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Ok, so, this is a funny question, but why don't you speak?

I ask because when I get stressed out, my symptoms become much MUCH worse, particularly the sensory stuff. I start hating to talk, because it's so loud, I hate contributing to the noise, and when I have to, it's really hard to put drag enough attention away from everything else in order to make words happen. I was wondering...is this feeling related to why some people don't speak at all? or is it a different thing? (I honestly know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about it...which is why I ask...)

It’s the same
for me it’s too many thoughts for so few words
for everyone it appears different
the overall feeling places us in herds
for me it's choosing which word you'd like
'cause I hate harming you
when you're hurt from what I unknowingly berate
I restrict myself to the familiar few

you don't partake
in what hurts the most
and what you hate

i go through days when i dont speak to anyone. it use to be worser when i was younger, now its just worse

Technically and clinically, a nonverbal person is someone who cannot use language in a coherent and functional way. It's more profound than just not speaking. It's the inability to use (and in severe cases comprehend) language. Since language is primarily oral, and secondarily written, anyone who can write is "verbal" and can use and understand oral langauge, even if volitionally they choose not to talk or there's some psychological reason why they do not talk.

Anyone with HFA or AS would be verbal, clinically speaking. It's part of the dx criterion (at least implicitly). Only LFA can be nonverbal.

Cade,

I cannot use language in a coherent, comprehensible and ultimately functional way when I speak verbally.... Actually I don’t speak unless you're my mum...I’ve been LFA before and currently I’m HFA, I've always spoken to my mother....

I can hear what you say, I cannot listen to what you say...I cannot feel what you say.

I think what Cade means is that since you can write, you're not nonverbal. Being verbal doesn't mean you can speak, it means you can communicate using language. Even LF auties who never speak, but can type or in some other way use language are not nonverbal. So really the author of the thread was addressing his question to people who are nonspeaking, not nonverbal, since by definition, someone who is nonverbal would be unable to answer him.

*SHRUG*

I've mainly seen people “out there” use "verbal" as spoken words rather than written..., that’s what it means right? I cannot understand the dictionary....

Anyway, the only difference between LFA and HFA is the arbitrary IQ test, not whether you can speak "verbally" or not; IQ doesn't always correlate with a person’s ability to speak.

are we talking about speaking?
yes, i only talk to people when i am buying things in shops or so forth.
in the last ten years. there are four people i have had conversations with more than 'hi how u doin - fine -ok'. i dont like conversations because im not very good at them

I checked out the dictionary, and it looks like in common usage, "verbal" is used to mean speech in things like "verbal agreement." However, I know that when used by professionals regarding autism or other conditions, being "verbal" just means being able to communicate with language or a representation of language (ex. even photographs or line drawings count if they are assigned a meaning). My AAC teacher really emphasized that last semester. A nonspeaking person who uses a letter board is not nonverbal. Any discipline has it's own lingo. For instance, in linguistics, the words "process" and "rule" have very specific meanings and are only used in the context of particular theories. Linguistics also maintains a critically important difference between "ordering" and "ranking". Likewise in statistics, the word "significant" has a very specific meaning.

In addition, think about "verbal" versus "nonverbal" abilities, and you'll realize that when someone speaks of verbal abilities, they are referring to the ability to use language. The ability to write is not a "nonverbal" ability- I should know, I have a nonverbal learning disability!

You can't be nonverbal and get a decent IQ score though. Just by nature of the fact that you can't communicate through language means that you're not going to score out of the mentally ret*d range. It doesn't mean that that person *is* ret*d, just that they are unable to express their intelligence in a way that can be measured by an IQ test. So you can't be HFA and nonverbal, although of course you can be LFA and verbal.

I'm not nonverbal, but I can relate kinda. I find it draining to talk too long. I really don't say much unless I have to or I'm around my family. It's always easier to talk with my family than anyone else. I talk the most with my mom and pets.

i think and i feel, but i can almost count how many times i have actually made verbal connection with another person where i was verbally involved in rapport and guess what? it surprised the hell out of me! it was a great feeling but unfortunately i can't seem to tap in on what makes it work so i just speak mundane things as an attempt to fit in.

I really like the way you put that...

I do have problems with putting my thoughts into words. I have too many thoughts for just words to explain and get my point across. So my points get totally messed up and people take it the wrong way. It's like I have to 'translate' what I'm thinking into words that people can understand. It is difficult and very tiring and frustrating.
Most of the time I just don't speak at all, when I do speak it's usually no more than a sentence or a phrase. It's the same thing when posting on message boards, it can take me an hour or two to write a post that is more than 15 lines.
I always thought it would be so much easier to be telepathic, lol. Be able to conversate using the visuals and emotions along with words in my head. Like whole thoughts. So I wouldn't have to articulate with just words.

I think I might be more hfa than aspie, or maybe I'm just stupid as hell.

Thanks

I've always wondered this about LFAs as well (Amanda Bagg for example). I mean obviously it's nothing to do with retardation but I'd be interested to know what people with LFA have to say about this.

Now I speak a lot, but when I was among 15, 16 I used to speak very few...
well, in fact I don't really remember how was it... it occcurs now that, as my use of language by that time was very litle, I wouldn't be able to explain many things that I couldn't understand, but this is another story...
I was excessive shy, and to press me to speak meant that I would close myself even more, but many people used to do that, specially language teachers that used to torture me following times.
My family was of no help, pressing me to speak when somebody strange arrived home and punctuating my few phrases with the comment: lost a chance of being silently.
Other less important factors as thinking... well these two factors were the strongest.

I am thinking that I was probably a litle gift for language studies, but how I hated those classes in wich I was forced to speak again and again. The use of the word torture is not really abusive in this case, and all those english and french teachers knew it.