Is it worth getting a diagnosis for my autistic traits?

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Hey guys, I'm here because I have a few questions. I've been seeing a therapist for social anxiety and she recently told me that I have a few noticeably autistic traits, but mild ones. At first, I was kind of like "dafuq no way I'm on the spectrum" but after a bit of research, I found a lot of stories/traits that I identified with. My AQ was around 30, and I did a Ritvo autism test, and got a score that was way above threshold.

I'm gonna list out some of my traits, and I'd like to know whether anyone here can relate. Obviously I'm not trying to substitute a professional opinion, but this feels like a natural first step.

Social issues
I haven't MASSIVELY struggled with social cues since I was about 14 (I'm nearly 18 now). I used to talk excessively, overshare a lot and make incredibly inappropriate comments at bad times. When I was a child, almost all my teachers remarked that I was rude, upset other children often and had poor motor skills. I was also very badly bullied. When I was about 15, then I went mute for a year. This is when I was diagnosed with social anxiety. Now, I largely mimic behaviours in people around me to the point where very little of my speech/mannerisms are genuine. I'm a huge copycat- I take phrases, gestures and facial expressions from people I know and celebrities in an attempt to portray a very specific image of myself. When I feel like I've mucked up (eg. If I'm trying to mimic a certain TV character and I get one of their mannerisms wrong), I feel depressed, empty and have self harmed.

If you met me, you'd say I was friendly and engaging, but it's all a huge f*****g act. I'm empty, nervous and self loathing. My views and opinions change depending on who I'm with. I'm just a shell. I often take days off to recover from the huge toll that this takes on me. I've forced myself to be humorous. As a kid, I couldn't get sarcasm and jokes even if I tried. Now, I crack jokes very often, but it's something that I find difficult to maintain. I'm good at socialising in the literal sense, but I always find it draining as hell.

Sensory issues
I don't have an awful lot of sensory issues, but the main ones come under sense of smell, taste, touch and sound. I have an INCREDIBLE sense of smell which leads to a very sensitive taste. I can't eat most foods so as a result, I have a very very narrow diet. I'm 18 and I'm still a picky eater. I've been told by some that I have the appetite of a pregnant woman, in that very specific smells and tastes make me sick. If I'm around a strong smell, the first thought that comes to me is "holy s**t if I breathe any more of this air I'm going to dIE " I have several stims, such as rubbing my nails against my lips, spinning in circles if I'm excited and cracking my fingers because the sound of the crack makes me happy.

Sadly for my boyfriend, I despise sex and tongue kissing. I do it anyway because I can tolerate it for him, but I really really don't enjoy it. It's painful and overwhelming emotionally.

I'm also OBSESSED with the lines you get on your body when a pillow indents. I spend hours at night just feeling them, looking at them and rubbing them against my face. (These are the lines I'm talking about, just for reference: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BuXEpNcIUAMNK2Z.jpg) God, just looking at the picture makes me feel so good. Wow, I'm weird. I also rub my temples when I'm overloaded outside due to sounds and lights. I like feeling the pulse in my head. Electric fans give me sh***y ass headaches, which makes hot weather difficult because I often need to pick between sweating my butt off and having a migrane.

Special interests/personal qualities
So this is the main one I feel applies to me. Since I was about 4 or 5, I have had incredibly intense attachments to things like books, movies and characters. I have a very elaborate fantasy world that I can completely immerse myself in. From speaking to my peers, this does not seem normal. I spend hours a day and every minute of my free time just living in the world that I've created, to the point where I can feel cut off from real life. Sometimes I just feel like cutting off my friends, breaking up with my bf and living in my head. I feel I would be happy doing this. I theorise that I've used these worlds as an escape from the sense of social isolation I've always felt. When I was 11-13, I had virtually zero close friends and interacted with no one but my family on an intimate level, but I was so happy. To me, I only needed my lord of the rings books and my brain and I could cut out all the loneliness, all the bullying and the pain.

I've always been a step out of phase with my peers. I've never worn makeup, never caught up with the fashions and consider myself half male in a sense. I can't explain it, I've just never been comfortable as a woman. i feel like I'd be much, much happier as a man. I don't think I'm trans, but I'm definitely androgynous to a degree.

So yeah sorry for the text vomit. These are all the traits I can think of. Is it worth getting professionally assessed?

That depends on what you want. What do you need the diagnosis for, or what might you need it for in the future? Disability accommodation at school/work, for example.

There is also the issue of whether you can actually get the services you need. Why bother if you can't get anything useful? I know a lady on disability for mental health issues who confirmed what I long suspected--when you turn 18 in Connecticut you are "magically cured" and needed services are no longer available.
There is a guy in California who points out that services are theoretically available, but the people employed don't know how to help adults on the spectrum.

If you think the diagnosis will help you get the help that you need, go for it.

A diagnosis may be helpful in its own right. It may give you much greater understanding of who you are and hie You work. You are entitled to live in ways which are comfortable. In your post I read of a Lot of efforts you make fitting in, the mimicking, not holding your own opinions, doing activities to please boyfriend even though you find them unpleasant.

All that takes energy. It has long term risks. It is not unknown for people to live in this way for many years but at some point, perhaps middle thirties, ones forties with increasing responsibilities a crisis happens because one is Exhausted by the efforts of this fitting in and surpresding ones actual self.

Even if the presentation is not severe enough to count as a disability, knowing ones profile is or may be Autistic can guide the decisions one makes around accommodations to the world in public and compensation accommodations to ones autistic nature in private, such as Not putting oneself through a sexual relationship if sex is a source of discomfort. Spending time alone or on things one can do oneself. If being social in ones work, compensating by non social time outside without having to worry about it not being natural. Unsocial time is perfectly natural if your profile falls on the spectrum.

I would suggest watching some of the talks by Sarah Hendricx or Tony Attwood found on You Tube.

What you write is consistent with the description of the autistic spectrum in women in their talks.

What you write around not feeling totally s woman seems consistent with testimony Sarah Hendrikx relates in at least one talk on Aspergers and relationships..

You may find some months spent in research very rewarding.