Do you say/make dumb things that you regret later?

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TheWarrior
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29 Jun 2017, 11:46 am

I mean, usually when I'm in a social situation it's as if another "me" is in control, and this "me" say some dumb things, say some sentences in a way that makes them hard to understand or change their meaning, sometimes speak when it shouldn't or don't speak when should, etc.

In few words I could say it's an "unpredictable me". Which is not controled by my rational mind but something else.
It's really frustrating not having control over myself and having to relly on some sort of luck to be successful in a social situation, like "will this other Me say some idiot thing or will it not be so awkward this time?".

And then when I come home I keep asking myself "why did I do that?" and then I can imagine many better ways in which I could have said/done that without being so awkward.


Do you also experience it?



alex
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29 Jun 2017, 11:55 am

I often feel the same way. Many times after I leave a social situation, I go over the thing in my head repeatedly thinking about the things I could have said differently.


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TheSilentOne
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29 Jun 2017, 11:59 am

I always feel this way. I cringe so much when I think about a lot of the things I have said in the past.


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kraftiekortie
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29 Jun 2017, 12:01 pm

This happens on a regular basis with me.



EzraS
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29 Jun 2017, 12:12 pm

When it comes to this, I am thankful that I can't talk.



JakeASD
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29 Jun 2017, 1:00 pm

I am usually too placid and 'spaced out' to reflect back on what I said.

Social situations tend to be quite surreal for me as they often seen rather contrived and cinematic. There's always a part of me that half expects a director to come out from behind a curtain and say "Cut!". I guess it's comparable to the Jim Carrey film, "The Truman Show".


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Mr.Robot
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29 Jun 2017, 1:42 pm

On a daily basis. Too many to count, not enough time!


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harry12345
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29 Jun 2017, 2:50 pm

Doesn't every one do this?

Plenty of people have said inappropriate things to me loads of times.



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29 Jun 2017, 4:20 pm

Yep~! This type of thing seems to be common among people on the spectrum. I think it stems from the not understanding certain social cues and knowing what is and is not an appropriate thing to say, or when it is no longer ok to say it. I have tried to fix this bad habit multiple times, but it still happens no matter how much I try to stop it, and it also seems to get me into all kinds of trouble with adults and authority figures... :? :cry:


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1Biggles1
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29 Jun 2017, 4:50 pm

Yes , daily and always review my day to reflect on what i may have misinterpreted , said that may have been misunderstood or think about ways i may have been able to say things differently.



TheWarrior
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29 Jun 2017, 5:53 pm

harry12345 wrote:
Doesn't every one do this?

Plenty of people have said inappropriate things to me loads of times.

Yeah I think that it's normal to a certain degree.
But I think in my case and some other people it happens so often that it's much more noticeable and becomes a real problem. And during these situations it feels like you're not really in control of yourself, but acting in some kind of an automatic way.

My theory is that some kind of depersonalization occurs when we're tense/anxious, and then we lose the control of our actions and then it's as if an "automated being" takes control, and it acts in it's own dumb way and do things that we would never do if we had clear access to our rational mind in that moments.



IstominFan
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29 Jun 2017, 8:12 pm

All the time



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07 Jul 2017, 4:50 pm

alex wrote:
times after I leave a social situation, I go over the thing in my head repeatedly thinking about the things I could have said differently.


Only if they were dumb to begin with. So, not as often as I might think otherwise.



JakeASD
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07 Jul 2017, 4:52 pm

Do I have a CAPD as I can seldom remember a damn thing anyone ever says to me?


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BirdInFlight
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07 Jul 2017, 4:58 pm

alex wrote:
I often feel the same way. Many times after I leave a social situation, I go over the thing in my head repeatedly thinking about the things I could have said differently.


I could have written every word of this post about my own experiences socially.



SaveFerris
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07 Jul 2017, 5:30 pm

BirdInFlight wrote:
alex wrote:
I often feel the same way. Many times after I leave a social situation, I go over the thing in my head repeatedly thinking about the things I could have said differently.


I could have written every word of this post about my own experiences socially.


ditto Alex

ditto BIF :lol:


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