I struggle talking to my mom as an Aspie Adult

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bluespinda
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 11 Aug 2017
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 1

11 Aug 2017, 6:36 am

Ever since I started college and after I graduated, I have not been able to properly speak to my mom without a communication breakdown, arguing and ignoring each other in cold silence. I am not the easiest person to talk to and I seem to have gotten worse around my family. She lives in a separate house than me about an hour away so I don't see her much even though I am back in my home state. I don't visit her because she is busy and I don't want to put more stress on her plate.
But whenever I talk to her it feels like she is being indirect with me, or not listening to me, or putting more pressure on me to find a job even though I have been working every day to finalize everything and start applying (It's animation and it is not easy)

I am fully aware that it is probably me who is the problem here (my mom is a very open person and I who is not, is straining us both) and I was wondering if anyone had similar problems and if so how did you go about to re connect with your mom or parent in general?



kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

11 Aug 2017, 5:35 pm

I feel that your mother is being the jerk in this situation.

What does she do for a living where she's always "busy?"

What does she say to you about getting a job?

She should be more direct with you, and should also show her love.

Just because you're an adult---doesn't mean that a parent's affection should just stop.



IgA
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 20 Aug 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 201

11 Aug 2017, 5:45 pm

I stopped having problems talking to my mother after she died. Actually, it was about 5 months before she died, because that is when I stopped talking to everyone in my family. Life has been better since then, except for occasional strangers that treat me bad. I started posting videos on youtube of my projects & have made friends there. It is so much better to type than to interact with people in person. I don't even have to talk in my videos. It is great.