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hurtloam
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29 Oct 2017, 4:07 am

Seems to me a lot of cognative behavioural therapy and positive thinking is about ignoring how you feel about injustice.

Do aspies have a strong sense of justice because we see things as black and white?

The thing that is annoying me most at the moment is the way the average person doesn't look out for people who are lonely or struggling with mental health issues.

I try and include people. If I see someone needs support i try and make them feel welcomed and invite them along to things even if they aren't really my cup if tea. I'll still make an effort with them.

Other people seem happy in their bubbles with their family and friends and dont care to look beyond their own noses.

Rather than get upset about this it's seems I should put up and shut up and just accept it and move on for the sake of my own mental health.

I guess I can't always change things for the better. People suck.



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29 Oct 2017, 4:18 am

I used to be more optimistic about CBT, but basically I agree. It can feel like rationalizing your way out of emotions, which is unhealthy. Sometimes we need rage, or depression, or whatever else may be uncomfortable at the time. But, uncomfortable is not the same as inappropriate, and hard is not the same as bad. I often feel like CBT is basically saying to yourself, "I'm being beaten right now, but I won't always be beaten, and I won't always be beaten by this person." It erodes personal emotion, personality, and the parts of us which are unique, individual, and make art, which is much healthier than CBT. CBT is just a way to make people "functional," which is just a euphemism for "employee."



ASPartOfMe
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29 Oct 2017, 5:44 pm

I took a little bit of CBT. The whole things seemed to be like the old song "Don't Worry Be Happy" worded to sound logical and scientific to appeal to aspies.


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starcats
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29 Oct 2017, 6:27 pm

hurtloam wrote:
Do aspies have a strong sense of justice because we see things as black and white?


I think it's because we see truth. We're not easily fooled by a facade, no bubble. Like a horse that kicks people for being incongruent.

I wonder what CBT would be like if it was led by another aspie?



Esmerelda Weatherwax
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29 Oct 2017, 7:08 pm

The weird part is that professionals actually *know* that "happy horse-poo" is bunk. Google the term "depressive realism" - it will make you shake your head.

I tend to think that much positive psychology, etc., is a social control mechanism. (Shame the people who think critically and ask discomfiting questions, and they will quiet down and go away. Then you can continue doing whatever you were doing that they caught on to.)

(antidote: google Julie Norem and "defensive pessimism". This is basically the idea that good planning incorporates a worst-case analysis - which any decent engineer lives by. Her idea didn't get the traction it deserved, and I think that's because she chose two terms with very negative connotations - defensiveness and pessimistic - to describe it.
Link)


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29 Oct 2017, 8:38 pm

It's intended to change how you think, not what you think.

It is something, however, that relies greatly on the adeptness of the person you're seeing.


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Daniel89
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29 Oct 2017, 8:42 pm

I am not sure if this is CBT but when I was 17 and first went to therapy for feeling suicidal the therapist told me to wear a rubber band and snap it against my wrist when stressed it was the most ridiculous thing ever.



hurtloam
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29 Oct 2017, 10:58 pm

starcats wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
Do aspies have a strong sense of justice because we see things as black and white?


I think it's because we see truth. We're not easily fooled by a facade, no bubble. Like a horse that kicks people for being incongruent.

I wonder what CBT would be like if it was led by another aspie?


Ooh. I'd love to try that.



hurtloam
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29 Oct 2017, 11:00 pm

Daniel89 wrote:
I am not sure if this is CBT but when I was 17 and first went to therapy for feeling suicidal the therapist told me to wear a rubber band and snap it against my wrist when stressed it was the most ridiculous thing ever.


That seems more like something to replace cutting as a safer way to deal with stress rather than a suicide prevention technique.



Eliza_Day
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30 Oct 2017, 11:33 am

HighLlama wrote:
CBT is just a way to make people "functional," which is just a euphemism for "employee."


Yes. All therapists are trying to do is to make sure the patient/client eventually adjusts to a sick society - whether they want to or not.

It should be the other way round; humanity should be encouraged to adhere to a proper code of conduct.



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30 Oct 2017, 2:52 pm

The past 11 months I have taken CBT

The counselor acts just the opposite.

The counselor told me it was "unfortunate" that someone had the nerve to call me "fa***t".

"Injustice"?

The current counselor (as well as almost all of the previous ones :D about ten professional counselors) tends to grossly magnify everything I say. Good or bad. "Injustice" or just something that is not "injustice" per se

The counselor told me she is "happy" for me when things are going well and "sorry" for me when things are not going well

Previous counselors said "I'm sorry" when I told them the slightest bad thing happened. For example, I went to a meditation meetup, and they were not friendly. :D so what?

When the counselor makes a big deal out of everything, it makes me feel guilty for telling them. Then I wonder if I should be calming the counselor down, not vice versa..... :roll: :roll: :roll:


This is not an "injustice", but I told a counselor that I took an hour for a bowel movement. And she told me "that horrible"

Gross exaggeration

Poverty, disease, crime, war are "horrible'

It was almost like :idea: reverse psychology :x .

Maybe She wanted me to tell her it was not

that bad :roll:


But I ain't telepathic

The current counselor (and the former counselors too) used weak logic almost all of the time.

But maybe there is no strong logic in the world

She told me someone "got mad" and I "felt bad". And it was a "miscommunication". And the other party was "rude"

And I feel sometimes like she is just providing customer service. The counselor is biased in my favor. And she acted like I was completely innocent and morally justified and the other part was Public Enemy Number One :roll:

But maybe it is necessary for her to be biased in my favor, to offset the numerous precious lil "people" that were and are totally biased against me.......

The current counselor compared me to Rosa Parks. In that I went to the bathroom that I identify with, instead of the one that matches how I was assigned at birth.

But that was totally going overboard

And I do not really believe it



starcats
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30 Oct 2017, 5:51 pm

hurtloam wrote:
starcats wrote:
hurtloam wrote:
Do aspies have a strong sense of justice because we see things as black and white?


I think it's because we see truth. We're not easily fooled by a facade, no bubble. Like a horse that kicks people for being incongruent.

I wonder what CBT would be like if it was led by another aspie?


Ooh. I'd love to try that.


You'd love to kick people for being incongruent, or go to an aspie-led CBT? :D



kraftiekortie
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30 Oct 2017, 6:59 pm

I believe in CBT; I don't believe in "positive thinking" in the "self-help" sense.

I believe in thinking realistically---which is what CBT should be about.

I stopped reading "self-help" books over 30 years ago.



Esmerelda Weatherwax
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30 Oct 2017, 7:04 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I believe in CBT; I don't believe in "positive thinking" in the "self-help" sense.

I believe in thinking realistically---which is what CBT should be about.

I stopped reading "self-help" books over 30 years ago.


Ah, so you noticed how they all danced around, but never addressed, *real* large-scale social issues such as abusiveness? Making nothing they said of any use whatsoever?

(Edit in: you might like George K. Simon. He's a psychologist and is totally unafraid to address social issues such as the sharply increased prevalence of character disorders over the past 45-50 years. No B.S. with him.)


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Last edited by Esmerelda Weatherwax on 30 Oct 2017, 7:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.

MagicMeerkat
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30 Oct 2017, 7:06 pm

This is why CBT and traditional therapy doesn't work for me. How can I be "positive" when things are going wrong in my life? Every therapists asks me WHY I'm depressed and when I tell them why, they don't listen and want me to do a bunch of pointless BS that isn't going to change anything.


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starcats
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30 Oct 2017, 7:57 pm

Esmerelda Weatherwax wrote:
(Edit in: you might like George K. Simon. He's a psychologist and is totally unafraid to address social issues such as the sharply increased prevalence of character disorders over the past 45-50 years. No B.S. with him.)


Oh my, a quick google search tells me I should read up on him. Thanks for sharing, your posts are always spot on.