Still more about me.

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This was meant to be an addition to my " In the rehab place " threaf, but, AGAIN , I pressed the wrong button and I cannot switch this to a Reply,, anx I can't rewrite this, my phone is nearly out of juice already.




...It has been the ability to go downtown some and get things that has made it do-able to be here, though I"ve been preached at by some here that I must not do so, and, I sort of sneak around one doctor who foesn't want me to. It has allowed me to, for things that could be called necessities, get clothes, check my USPS mail, get minutes to keep this phone going (Though of course there's someone here who says I shouldn't have a phone. ), start on getting a handicapped bus pass.
I don't have a TV here. No overwhelming whoop, but I don't have one. One of my roomates here does, and I am now not telling you a great deal about him that I could!
The other day, I forgot my crutch when I wemt back inside from beind by the parking lot, I went back and retrieved it. I suppose that doesn"t mean I don"t need it, back in San Francisco I would somtimes leave it behind, remember, and go back for it.
I tend to doubt that I will ever not need the vrutch, I have improved on walking, and I may improve some more...Buf will I ever not need, at least as protection/for rest, a crutch? Will I ever walk as well as I did in early 2015? I tend to think no . Do you feel otherwise? It's not that anyone here's ever met me.
It's been the mucho rest and getting treatment that has made me improve. That can't go on forever, oc course. Remember, I hopeful-anticipating that, immediarly after this, I might be lucky and go too a " good " shelter, I'm not imaging realistically more than that - I have somd (too many, I suppose) reading matter and a fes " take with me " clothes to pjf in my backpack and a duffle bag when I leave -
But, realistically, all I really can " own " for keeps is what I can carry in my pockets - it's been that way for many years now - I don't really have any " stuff " . And, my several-times-a-day strong, sometimes violent, coughing from my COPD might might make me pretty unpopular in a sheltet situation - just as it did in San Francisco .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

It means a lot that you went through all the trouble just to see us. It means a lot to me. As for the crutch, I think you can get strong enough to not need it. Our bodies continually improve in harsh conditions. I think all of this bad has made you a strong person. Stop worrying about the past. Your writing the future for many people by just being here.

I wanted to say this about your "inheritance": your best bet to unload it if you can get your hands on it is a used book store, and you wont get much. I wouldn't buy it from you because I cant inspect the discs, and even if I could there is shipping cost (why pay that for stuff I could get at a local used bookstore?). And then the concern that I doubt that if I bought them from you that you would have the follow through to even send them. I also think its nutty that you are seeking the involvement of people you have met online to secure these things and or track down your personal records. That's a dangerous thing to do that opens you up to such things as identity theft.

...I just lost a draft of this letter so, at least for now, I won't say much, but basically...Why should I care much what you think? And I don't recall you expressing much interest in those CDs, anyway.







rwho222"]I wanted to say this about your "inheritance": your best bet to unload it if you can get your hands on it is a used book store, and you wont get much. I wouldn't buy it from you because I cant inspect the discs, and even if I could there is shipping cost (why pay that for stuff I could get at a local used bookstore?). And then the concern that I doubt that if I bought them from you that you would have the follow through to even send them. I also think its nutty that you are seeking the involvement of people you have met online to secure these things and or track down your personal records. That's a dangerous thing to do that opens you up to such things as identity theft.

I've decided I don't care one way or another about your indulgences. I think you are killing yourself slowly because you lack the courage to do it quickly, but it doesn't effect me one way or another.[/quote]

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

Just a little tip. Hope this doesn't sound patronising but have you tried eating honey for your cough? It has antibacterial properties.

I'm Drumpp, the grump of the garbage dump,
I'm a contradictory cuss,
I'm grubby and gruff, and just as rough
as an old rhinoceros.

I never wash, and like to squash
my fingers into worms,
I'm full of fleas and smelly cheese
and fifty million germs.

I swallow food before it's chewed,
I belch an awful lot,
I smell like a goat, and wear a coat
that swarms with slime and rot.

I'm mean as a bear that's burned his hair,
I've nothing nice to say,
I don't like you...or you...or YOU!
You'd better go away.

I'm Drumpp, the grump of the garbage dump,
I'm hard as a battering ram,
but I want you to know before you go...
I LIKE THE WAY I AM!

...To answer the revent critical comments about me:roll::
What is this new interest all of a sudden in what I said in the past about those CDs, etcetera?! ! I believe I pretty mich dropped the subject here, perhaps?? even explicitly saying so...I acknowledge/d the demand-selling price problem (Plus, the inventory I received listed considerably fewer of them than I know I sent him over the years . (Sadness for the passage of years/my never getting to see him over the years-his death not, really??, the discs.) Methinks some may have grown legs and walked away over the years, but what you gonna do? If possible, I'd just like to make use of them myself.

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...Really, I've rather internalized/said " you may be right " before, maybe here, about past comment regarding the value of old CDs. And, anyway, realistically speaking, I am so poor and witbout resources/" stuff "/infrastructure that, IF I guess an adequate/okay place of some sort, that those CDs, etc, and a portable DVD player could be of some use to me !
DW, moving onward, has said before that I shouldn't even have the little phone that I am typing this on now, and he has belittled my past-stated ambition to go to uni, saying that my - relatively mild, even prior to right now - crippled status makes uni undoable for me ! I thought, ic anything that going to school whilst crippled was one of those generally lauded kind of Oprah/Maria at the Special Olympics/Hallmark Channel-Ion TV movie kind of things!

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...As far as trying to get help, yes, I need it! I was grying for help where I could possibly get it. I would be careful? try to make sure someone's trustworthy andbe cautious...Buf, I did get some help from two people on this forum (One's no longer active here.), telling them some extremely personal things! It worked out okay. Partly, it's an attempt at continuing that old punk/fanzine/bohemia " trusting people : thing!
DW put up a jokey poem from somewhere referrinng to a character he obviously comoares to me. Whoopie

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...As far as the crutch goes - Actual walking, I suppose, has not so much beem the point with it as, perhaps, steadying me/keeping me from falling - and rrsting on it, when I am a bit fatigued after some steps, and geting up.from a seated position. If I am ever in a " real " place , and go out without a hiking backpack on, would I walk normally? Perhaps .

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...I just now tried to write a LONG, deeply felt, carefuy written post up here...and at the posting stage, I LOST IT ! ! Tech-wise, I HAVE NEARLY NOTHING !

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...No. This Cricket is all I have.
Wben I was in the shelter in San Francisco, there was a fellow bohemian/inmatr who was selling old tech, I talked about the possibility of seeing if he had something I could use, but I never quite had the money...I kind of spent it to come down to here, SC, for one! Though I never quite had the money to seriously ask him....I migbt have posted about the possibility here, I suppose.





"AnneOleson"]

...I just now tried to write a LONG, deeply felt, carefuy written post up here...and at the posting stage, I LOST IT ! ! Tech-wise, I HAVE NEARLY NOTHING !

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...I lost still another post this last nite:cry:. Now I'll see whether I can get this, rather astonishing, development up.
Another patient in this place, who had Alzheimers' walked into my room and walked over to the bed of one of my roomates and started hitting him! The roommate was just lying there! - He's wheelchair-bound and needs help to get out of bed.
The Alzheimers' attacker wasn't strongly hitting him, I suppose, but it was still a hit! I yelled "Help! " and thd staff came and pulled him off. The attackee himself has some amount of dementia. The attacker had come into our room before but he had always seemed harmless. Sheesh!

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!

...Now. someone who I think was the attacker came back into my room at least once today ! I shooed him away, or tried to.

_________________
Renal kidney failure, congestive heart failure, COPD. Can't really get up from a floor position unhelped anymore:-(.
One of the walking wounded ~ SMASHED DOWN by life and age, now prevented from even expressing myself! SOB.
" Oh, no! First you have to PROVE you deserve to go away to college! " ~ My mother, 1978 (the heyday of Andy Gibb and Player). I would still like to go.
My life destroyed by Thorazine and Mellaril - and rape - and the Psychiatric/Industrial Complex. SOB:-(! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!