Got my PIP face to face assessment next week :(

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I haven't posted here in a while but I thought I would today because I am so anxious. I started a claim for PIP in July but only managed to summon the motivation to fill it in and send it off a few weeks ago. Since then I've been so worried about whether I'll have to go and do the face to face assessment and whether or not I will get the support or if they'll even take me seriously. Anyway, this morning the dreaded letter came and I have an appointment next Friday morning.

I feel so anxious about it and my sleep has really suffered this week with the worry of it all. I was only able to fill in the form and get it sent off because I was having a good spell of a few days, which has actually now been a few weeks which is great. I do feel like I am one small step away from plunging back into my little rabbit hole but have been trying to calm myself as much as I can so it doesn't happen. Because I am at the moment going through a relatively good spell it is making me even more worried that they are going to just dismiss my claim, like I feel like I often do get dismissed when I try talking to the counsillor and doctor through work and tell them I just cannot cope. The only people who seem to get it are my GP, the autism specialist nurse and my bosses at work. I've been off work for nearly 6 months and this time last year was only returning from a 4 month spell of sickness. Even then I still wasn't up to it but I tried, and once again here I am.

I don't really know why I am here posting or what I hope to achieve but I just feel like a bit of a nervous wreck. I feel like I don't really have anyone to turn to at the moment. My boyfriend is upset with me and seems to want to make me suffer, not that he offers much in the way of support in the way I need him to support me with my issues. I just feel quite alone to be honest and I can just tell next week is going to be a total disaster. I have ASD, recurrent depressive disorder and generalised anxiety disorder. Life is hard. But are they going to understand that?? I'm not very good at putting myself across and how I feel and am affected as coherently as I would like. The next week is going to be torture

I can't really offer any advice on how to deal with the assessment as i didn't last 10 minutes with mine a couple of weeks ago, i just wanted to post a bit of solidarity and let you know you're not on your own.

What happened why you only lasted 10 minutes?

I've just been to CBT and told them about my appointment and how I don't wanna go on my own cos I'll mess it up and not be able to explain properly, but at the same time I don't really want my mum or dad there or anyone else cos I feel embarrassed talking about it all and telling the extent of how bad things can be. He mentioned something about an advocate and so I think I'm going to see if the nurse from adult autism services is able to come with me. I'd feel so much better! I'm not holding my breath that she will be able to though

I would recommend you have someone with you, if only as a witness to the whole procedure.

I pick up a strong sense that the purpose of that first face to face assessment is to reject the claim as a matter of course unless the evidence is overwhelming. I pick up the impression that most people only get what they are entitled to on appeal.

The assessor is not on your side.

Questions tend to be loaded to find every possible ground to deny your claim.

You do actually have to have the balls to state baldly how bad things can be.

Yes, you probably have lots of work arounds, some days which are better than others. Those are not things to tell the assessor. they will be recorded and used as reasons to reject your claim.

That's what worries me. I have a good and well paid job that I just cannot do at the moment and haven't been able to for the last 18 months. I'm on no pay as I've used all my sickness and pretty much drained my holidays. It should be obvious in situations like this that something is clearly not right and I need some help to get by otherwise people wouldn't put themselves through all this. I've been doing okay but I can just see this next week is going to bring me down. The question is, how long will it take me to get back on my feet. I want to see them at my worst but equally I don't because I know it will take me such a long time to come back from it. I'm so on edge :-/

I thought I was gonna have to go by myself but thankfully the nurse who helped me fill in the form is going to come with me. Hopefully she will be able to explain things when I get flummoxed. She has a much better way with words than I do and seems to understand me better than I understand myself! I hate all this having to jump through hoops, I really do

Have you heard of any local advocacy services in your area? They can be used for people who wish to claim PIP and ESA so that they stand a better chance.
I hope the new universal credit changes will be better, but I doubt it. It's good that there's a nurse helping you with the forms, though. The whole process is just so damn stressful.
Currently going through the lengthy process of appeal for ESA with the help of my indestructible mum and an advocate: she's a bureaucratic wizard, and has already told me she'll be present for my appeal to speak on my behalf, not that I'm still not petrified.
I really hope your assessment goes well. My experience of an assessor is that they'll try to lead you into traps with directed questions that make the claimant lose points. Of course, the system swears they don't have targets to meet (e.g. how many claimants get through per annum) but well...
Anyway, I just thought to mention this extra help available in case you didn't know or things turn sour, though I hope they won't. Best wishes.

Well I had my assessment this morning and I'm glad that it's over with. Now I have to deal with the after effects of feeling so stressed and anxious all week and not getting much sleep last night. I feel drained and hyper all at once and my head hurts. Can't wait to settle back down to my normal state.

I was so glad the nurse went with me because I was so nervous. The lady assessing me came across as really harsh and matter of fact at first but as it went on she seemed to warm towards me and sympathise a lot more. I just hope I got across the extent to which I am having problems. I really do need the help. Now it's onto yet another waiting game. I have no idea how long it will take but I pray it's sooner rather than later and is good news. I don't want to go through all this again

It's only been 2 weeks since my assessment but the wait is killing me, so I rang them up to check the progress. No decision has been made yet but they say there is a massive backlog and it is most likely going to be at least 6 weeks before I find out. The guy I spoke to on the phone was lovely, but how the hell am I supposed to keep my PIP nerves in check for 6 weeks?? I am having a bad day today anyway for some unknown reason. Most of the week has been bad, but last night I didn't sleep, even though I was at my boyfriend's had company and a nice evening. Then I've been to the chemist and rang the GP god knows how many times to try and get some more medication because I've ran out and nearly had a meltdown/burst into tears in the chemist. I was choking up so had to go straight home. I just feel like I need to curl up in a ball today and cry, but there is no real reason. I hope it isn't gonna be like this forever cos I'm fed up

It figures that there's a huge backlog of cases. The DSS people are snowed under with cases - usual situation, government won't pay for enough staff to do the job.

Sorry you've got to wait so long. The benefits people once sent me a "we need to see you" letter just before the Xmas holiday. I was worried sick until January. And that was just a couple of weeks. As it turned out, everything went well, but of course I didn't know that at the time. I guess all you can do is operate whatever stress management strategies you can find, and try to take your mind off the worry. Easier said than done, I know.

Just to update this thread, I got 0 points

You're probably right. The autism nurse who went with me wrote to me after saying it was obvious at the meeting i have difficulties with activities of daily living and budgeting and gave me some info about a contact or self referral i could make to get help with these things. Totally contradicts what they say. I asked for the report to be sent 3 weeks ago and I still haven't received it. And apparently, because I am educated to degree level I can't have the problems I say I have. Anyway, I don't have the energy to get het up about this as well. Was just updating the thread really