Is it wrong to want a cure for myself?

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Title.
Note the hypothetical cure would be only be for myself, not forced upon anyone who doesn't want it.
I have always wanted to be NT. I keep imaging what I would be like as a NT(e.g. tons of friends, dating beautiful women, having nice things, lots of money, etc). I don't care about being smart. I rather be social and average. I always hope they will invent a cure. Even if it changed who I am, I wouldn't mind starting life over.

I don't always tell anyone about this, because I get told that it's wrong to want to change who I am. But those who say that don't speak for me.

Nothing reprehensible about wanting something for yourself that you think is harmless.

But you may be overestimating the attractiveness that a cure would give you. As an Aspie I've got by, especially with finding partners, after a very unpromising start, and not all NTs are popular or wealthy.

I'd be interested in trying it, but only if it was safe and reversible.

Anyway it's not likely to happen.

It's not wrong to desire a cure and be allistic.
It's not wrong to achieve the things your peers did.

However...
One shouldn't assume that a cure will guarantee to grant you the life you imagined it to be.

Caring too much on this statement will put themselves in a pitfall of despair and self blame, stuck in a life full of should-have-beens.


Nothing is wrong with what your and wanting.

However, too much wanting will hurt you.
It will leave you embittered and stew in self loathing if you let the lack of achievement of your wants, your comparison and envy towards your NT peers to define your life and who you are.

If you reach to such point -- you are not wrong to envy.
You are not wrong to grieve 'what could have been'.

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I want to go under electroshock therapy like john elder robison did. To get the normal parts of the brain switched on. However I don’t have the funds for it.

Is it wrong? No.

Is it useful? Also, No.

Some Aspies do OK in life. Focus on your strengths and maybe you can be one of them.

I just want a lot of money

It's not wrong to want it. Realistically, it's not going to happen. Any treatment that's sufficiently effective to be a cure wouldn't be safe for adults.

It may be that aspects are eventually curable, but realistically, you are who you are and it's unlikely that there's much to be done other than making a place in the world for yourself.

I think it would be great to know when I'm hungry or thirsty, but some other aspects cut too deep to be curable without consuming changing who I am

Also, I can’t ever really accept the fact that I’m not normal. It’s like being locked in a prison cell with a small window where you can see everyone else outside living their lives. No matter how hard I kick or bang the door, it’s not coming open for me to go out and join the NTs

I've known since first grade that I was transgender but in the 1970s the cross dressing Klinger was ridiculed for wearing women's clothes. Basically a long running joke that cross dressers were to be mocked.

My wife knew but it never got any farther than wearing women's clothes that looked like men's clothes except for the buttons being on the wrong side. She concluded I had Apergers and suggested I get diagnosis and come to this forum!

When she passed I grew out my hair and began presenting increasingly more feminine.

I discovered the more feminine my appearance the more easily I socialized.
I concluded that trying to look like a guy put me in the uncanny valley between the two genders.

I have little difficulty socializing while presenting female!
I live in an extremely blue state where there are laws protecting gender equality.
More importantly my friends and neighbors are very acceptingl
More than accepting, as they love my flowering plants!
Last night a neighbor asked why I grew so many. Turns out that he also likes to go to Wickford Rhode Island!