why do people say socially awkward people are annoying?

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why do u think?
ive had this happened before
ive had a fake friend before.
ever had somewon making fun of or saying bad things about ur awkwardness?

i would get called weird,awkward and annoying.

what about you?

Because we are very annoying to more socially aware people?

I've had NTs call me annoying before and on the whole most are quite uncomfortable around me. NTs tend to avoid me when they see me and steer clear when they can because occasionally my emotional outbursts and aggressiveness intimidates and scares them.

Awkwardness is something that I've tried to overcome by simply being aggressive and quasi-charismatic and forcing people to accept me but this doesn't work all the time. And then we go back to the original problem of people feeling intimidated around me.

I have to erect a normal social shield around me so that people won't feel uncomfortable around me but I can't maintain it all the time successfully AND it really stresses me out. As soon as I start stimming or let out the accidental emotional outburst they quickly scurry away from me as if I'm made of kryptonite. The eventual outcome is that word will spread that I'm mentally handicapped or something and I'm back to square one.

I've cried my eyes out about this countless times.

I don't like feeling socially isolated from others when I'm with them but I tend to socially isolate myself to avoid this reaction from NTs. I'm still trying to resolve this contradiction.

What I don't get is how fictional characters that are geeky and/or socially awkward are seen as "adorkable" when people would nearly always find them weird or annoying irl. Maybe it's because they are already physically cute or attractive?

I've always wondered about the "adorkable" factor with fictional characters as well. And I'm sure you're right it has something to do with physical attractiveness or cuteness. But I think NTs simply want to appear charitable and condescending towards the socially awkward characters (Aspies). An ego thing perhaps.

NTs are fine with awkward Aspies as long as they're on the TV or movie screen and not sitting right beside them making them feel uncomfortable. It's that "I'm fine with Aspies as long as you don't personally affect me and make me look bad" persona.

Ugh...

Good question. I know a lot of people who watch Criminal Minds and everyone absolutely love Spencer Reid. I do too, that character is the main reason I watch the show, but I highly doubt that most of the people I know would like a person like him so much if they actually met someone like that in real life... would the character be so popular if the actor was very over weight, I wonder?

That's often true.

Every NT I know LOVES doctor House on TV (I don't have any affection for him, but NTs invariably do). But most admit that if they met a real person who talked like him they would kick that person's ass to the curb.

But to answer the OP's question:

Why do they call single men "bachelors"? Because "single male" is the definition of the word "bachelor".

Being annoying is a symptom of lacking social skills. Socially skilled folks know how to avoid being annoying.


What exactly you do that is annoying I don't know. But you probably do something that stems from your lack of social skills (like interrupt folks, or monologue, or something).

I think it has to do with making them uncomfortable.

That the fictional characters are supposed to be cute doesn't harm them, it may also be that they come off as the underdog, and a lot of people like to support the underdog as long as it doesn't make them feel uncomfortable, which a fictional character would be less likely to do. They also get to come under the skin and get to know them in fiction which 'humanizes' them to NTs.
And we shouldn't underestimate social pressure. If someone is deemed cute rather than annoying, people would likely not speak opposing views but keep them to themselves.

Of course there are also plenty of characters with ASD characteristics that are nothing but comic relief characters.

Fictional characters aren't difficult to get rid of, so they're less of a threat, less of a nuisance.

Like somebody said already, the exact behaviour of the OP that annoys people hasn't been revealed unto us, so it's hard to know why it's annoying people.

People like the idea of uniqueness more than the reality.

By definition social awkwardness means the interaction is more difficult. Difficult interactions annoy people. If you can figure out how to make the interaction easier for the other person it will be less awkward and annoying. A more concrete example is language barriers. Since people don't actually have to interact with or completely understand quirky fictional characters they can enjoy watching them, but not know what to do with them in real life.

In my opinion, the answer is none of the reasons stated by any of the posters. I don't know if this post will pick back up.

The reason neurotypical people find socially awkward people annoying is because the behavior is sustained and almost monotonous to them. Like someone who seems to constantly be stuck on one setting. You may find it endearing in some situations but there are times when you want them to be confident or more XYZ that you feel is befitting of someone with whom you can converse. I read a lot and "The Quirky Tale of April Hale" is a good read that kind of gave me a better perspective of how the NT counterpart has trouble in the romantic relationship. I do not claim to be an expert but it seems to be the likeliest thing in regards to what people typically find annoying. People like stability but monotony is not enjoyed by most.

As for the pop culture references: Yeah, they're characters. The writers try to give them depth but it's more that in reality, people don't know everything about a person (especially an ND) because they can't watch their lives on a reel. Everyone appears pretty 2D if not one-dimensional. When you truly get to know someone, you get to see all the other dimensions. And when you love someone, you want to explore the fourth with them and potentially find the fifth.

I think most peoples introduction to socializing is playing with others when they are young. Things get a bit more complex as one gets older so I like to think of it like tennis or something similar; Where's the fun in the game if your opponent isn't returning the ball properly or at all?

There is probably not just one single reason why all NTs find anything annoying.

They say this because those "awkward" people make them uncomfortable. They feel annoyed, so label the other person as annoying. Often it doesn't occur to them that they may be just as annoying to the "awkward" person. Or that that so-called awkward person might, due to their otherness, be more accepting of them than other non-awkward people.