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rebeccadanielprophet
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16 Dec 2017, 3:38 pm

When I was little I didn't talk art all. They did a beep test and decided that I'm "deaf". I went to a child psychologist. He or she (I dont remember) had me draw pictures and play the game pick up sticks. I did the games but I didn't say anything. I would yell and scream sometimes, even in public. It's basically all I've known my whole life, I didn't label myself as autistic I just didn't know. Lately I started banging my head and having freak-outs and teaching myself math and psychology, especially dream psychology. My mom said that saying I'm autistic will insult other autistic...I didn't even realize I'm autistic until a year ago. I did things like refusing to go to the easier math class, and they put me in the more advanced class. When I was in fifth grade, I remember mrs.mucciantes (I'm spelling her name wrong) in the special education classroom that I went to for a few hours during fourth and fifth grade. They had me put my hands in ice cold water and gave me a video game to play. I didn't really know. I had a speach therapist too and now people think I'm "schizophrenic"...I'm not.

Should i try to get a diagnosis? Or just let myself be me, made different to make a difference? I don't want to be put on risperdol.

I know this: you are who you are, and you and God are the only authority of who you really are. :)


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Change: sometimes it's painful, sometimes it's beautiful, but most of the times its both.

"Someday you might see who I really am, and it will change the way you feel about me." "Nothing could ever do that."


Made different to make a difference

whether as victor or vanquished, isn't it better than sullen resignation?


SplendidSnail
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16 Dec 2017, 4:40 pm

From what you describe, it seems very likely that you aren't Neurotypical. If you don't have ASD, you probably do have something else.

Is it ASD or something else? I can't say. I would certainly say it seems reasonable that talking to a psychologist certainly couldn't do you any harm.

If you are wanting to get a feel for how likely it is that you have ASD, you could try the AQ (Autism Quotient) test. Just be aware that the test isn't a diagnosis. It's checking whether you have characteristics typically associated with ASD, but it is possible to have these characteristics and still not be on the spectrum, or not have them and still be on the spectrum. You can find the test here:
https://psychology-tools.com/autism-spectrum-quotient/


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Level 1 Autism Spectrum Disorder / Asperger's Syndrome.


magz
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16 Dec 2017, 4:48 pm

rebeccadanielprophet wrote:
My mom said that saying I'm autistic will insult other autistic...

WHAT? Did she use the word "insult"? Meaning what? That you were something worse than other autistic people? I just don't get it, it's so very, very wrong...

rebeccadanielprophet wrote:
I didn't even realize I'm autistic until a year ago. I did things like refusing to go to the easier math class, and they put me in the more advanced class. When I was in fifth grade, I remember mrs.mucciantes (I'm spelling her name wrong) in the special education classroom that I went to for a few hours during fourth and fifth grade. They had me put my hands in ice cold water and gave me a video game to play. I didn't really know. I had a speach therapist too and now people think I'm "schizophrenic"...I'm not.

Should i try to get a diagnosis? Or just let myself be me, made different to make a difference? I don't want to be put on risperdol.

I got a misdiagnosis of schizophrenia before the right one of autism. It was hell, all the drugs that only made it worse :evil: You are right not to want risperidon if you are not schizophrenic.
A right diagnosis may help you figure out who you are and what your situation is. Also, your mother seems to say very wrong things to you. A diagnosis could help you gain independence from her opinion.
You are yourself anyway. Always.


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kraftiekortie
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16 Dec 2017, 5:57 pm

I sense that the mother thought that Rebecca was too "advanced" to be autistic, and that she would take treatment away from those people whom she sees as "real" autistics."

People have mistaken notions about autism---because they are not taught the latest reseach.



rebeccadanielprophet
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Joined: 14 Dec 2017
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16 Dec 2017, 11:18 pm

thanks guys. :)

I got a 35 on the test. Not that a test can fully quantify who someone is. Hope I wake up tomorrow, the people at my church are my real support system and I hope someday I can be honest with them.

I love my mom but sometimes we don't see eye to eye.


_________________
Change: sometimes it's painful, sometimes it's beautiful, but most of the times its both.

"Someday you might see who I really am, and it will change the way you feel about me." "Nothing could ever do that."


Made different to make a difference

whether as victor or vanquished, isn't it better than sullen resignation?


Embla
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17 Dec 2017, 5:07 am

My dad didn't believe me either, despite the paper with the psychiatrist's diagnosis. I knew he wouldn't, that's why I waited until I had the official dx, but it made no difference. I think a lot of family members react that way, simply because they don't know enough about the condition. It's the standard "but you look normal"-misconception.
In my case, my father knows about autism, as my little brother was diagnosed as a child, but he still wouldn't accept it when it comes to me. Maybe because I'm "too high functioning"? I don't know really. I think that just like I needed some time to accept my diagnosis, the people around me does too. It's not everyday you find out your kid has a disability, and I'm sure it gives them a lot to think about. A lot of people would rather avoid that kind of information than face it.