Everyone has Autism

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I was told by a doctor that they suspected I have autism. That was a few months ago. However, when I showed my mother the symptoms, which describe me amazingly well, she said it did sound like me, but anyone could be diagnosed with it. It made me sad, because since I was little I have wondered why I was different, and why people thought I was strange. It explains my current difficulties too. But now I feel like if I were to try and get a diagnosis, she would see it as a joke or an excuse, which it's not, it's an explanation. I just don't know how to find out without feeling embarrassed. Has this happened to you?

Well...autism is to some extent inheritable.

Could be that your mom a bit autistic herself. So if the symptoms of autism resemble you they might also resemble her too, and if so her saying "it could describe anyone" really means that it describes her herself, and she is unaware of how it does not describe just "anyone".

I didn't share this suspection with my parents. I am an adult and I don't live with them. They don't need know it. They would not understand too.

The autism spectrum is certainly real but not everyone understands it. Not everyone is autistic or exhibits autistic tendencies. Even within the autistic community there are vast differences and we're all different, with a wide range of characteristics.

I second the opinion that your mother's belief that "it describes everyone" is more about autistic traits prevalent in your family than about really everyone. People have this tendency to assign their own characteristics to "everyone". Like if someone says "this color suits everyone", it is most likely a good color for this person to wear.

Even if your mother thinks a diagnosis would be a folly, I think it would be worth the effort. Only be sure you go to someone expirienced with female ASD, otherwise you may be misinterpreted - knowledge on female ASD characteristics is still not very common.

Feminine Autism is notoriously hard to diagnose and much more difficult to detect than the masculine variety. I would ask your mother for a little more patience and perseverance and educate yourself on the various aspects and facets of female Autism.

Many girls go unnoticed when they have Autism as the symptoms are not as obvious as the symptoms in boys. And Asperger's Syndrome in girls is even harder still to diagnose than classic nonverbal Autism.

I would recommend a book by Tony Attwood for you and it's called "The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome" and it might help you and your family.

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*** High Functioning Autism - Asperger's Syndrome ***

ADHD, OCD, and PTSD.

Keep calm and stim away.

Perhaps your mother's reaction to your news is one of denial as well as disbelief? Maybe the thought of you having autism scares her. Or maybe the thought of you having autism makes her feel guilty about ways she may have treated you as a child?

No, everyone is not autistic. That's a part of this weird "We're all crazy" or "We're all okay" nonsense that popular culture wants us to believe. Degrees of autism do certainly exist, but everyone I know has matured on a typical timetable. I never knew anyone with autism when I was growing up because, in my day, the only cases of autism were clinical cases of people in institutions.