Weird, funny, or embarrassing moments from your childhood?

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Do you remember any weird, funny or embarrassing moments from your childhood? I'd you do, post them here

I thought I had pokemon powers so I ran circles around other kids screaming tornado attack.

During a really long Good Friday mass I stood up and started praying out loud. I said "please God, let this be over".

I was too young to understand the concept of race and I don't even remember this. I just noticed a difference and said "that man's face is dirty". I was pointing to a person with darker skin. My mom told me about that one but I don't remember it.

I hid under an idling truck which was very dangerous because I was so lost in a fantasy in which my school was a battleground. I figured hiding under the truck was the best way to avoid being shot or hurt.


In general I got lost in daydreams way too much and completely shut out the outside world. I searched the school for every possible hiding spot I could use in the event that I was in danger because I was in this "danger mode" daydream.


I thought the school yard was segregated by grade. I thought a certain section was 1st and 2nd grade territory. I saw some 5th graders entering what I thought was 1st and 2nd grade territory and I figured I had to defend it. I picked up a sharp object I found on the ground and slashed one of the 5th graders with it. The other two of them laughed and said "oh my god she just slashed you man". I didn't get him very deep and he just laughed it off. At that point I ran away.

Once in elementary school, when I was 7, I had a classmate whose nickname was "coco".
When I heard "coco", I thought about "coconut", and when the teachers told me it was my classmate's nickname, I said: "but the coconut is a fruit", because at the time I couldn't understand why a human could have the name of a fruit, animal, whatever, as a nickname. The teachers and all my classmates started laughing, and I got very angry at them because I was being serious, and I hate when I'm serious and people laugh at me.

When I was 3 and in pre-school, (state run one nothing like what you see in the US today) I got in trouble for being on my knees in the snow during recess. I know it sounds stupid but those people were sadists who looked for any excuse to punish children. Anyway, they had this huge room full of cage style cribs where we were forced to take a nap every day, each kid was assigned their own bed. So they put me in my bed and locked the room, I was alone in there. I had to pee REALLY bad but I didn't want to wet my bed. So I climbed over the side, climbed in another kid's bed, peed in it and climbed back in my bed. After recess it was official nap time for everyone. So that kid got in his bed full of pee and started crying. He got in trouble for wetting his bed

My Mum was called into my kindergarten because I had taken my toy Lion in and was attacking and upsetting all the other children with him....

I used to walk around school singing and having conversations with myself, I had no idea this was not normal until I got picked on by the other kids.

I created my own language at about 7-8 and used to speak in it sometimes leading to much confusion :/

When I was about 4 I would wake up each day and decide who I would be, I would choose different names I liked and only answer to them and some days I would be a cat, only meow and only drink milk from a bowl on the floor...

I told my primary school teacher that I didn't like old people, she asked why and I said "because they have yucky spots", she pulled up her sleeve and showed me her age spots and said "like this" and I said "yeah".

When I was about 10, I had a huge laughing fit in a restaurant because the guy at the next table was shaking his mustard jar when the top flew off and mustard went everywhere. I couldn't stop. Every time I'd start to calm down, I'd see another blob of mustard somewhere and that would set me off again. The poor guy finally turned to my mom and said, "I wish she'd shut up." And that made me laugh even harder.

When I was 12, I was at a pizza place and the restrooms opened right into the dining room. I went in and couldn't figure out how to lock the door, but I really had to go, so I just hoped for the best. Nope. And being a 12 year old girl, I let out a shriek and the whole dining room looked up and saw me sitting there.

My aunt and my grandma are always telling me about funny and cute things I did/said as a little kid, even though I don't remember a lot of them.

One time when my mom was mad at me and was giving me orders to do something, I saluted her and said, "My eye, captain!"

Another time, I got up one morning, ran to where my mom was having breakfast, and was like, "Mommy! What if Buzz Lightyear was a REAL boy?"

There was also this other time during the summer when I had just gotten out of a kiddie pool in my grandparents' yard, and the wind felt really cold on my back and shoulders. I was standing there shivering and chattering my teeth while my aunt was videotaping me, and my mom moved into the camera's view and said, "Let the record show that it is currently 80 degrees outside."

I also posted this in another thread, but one day my aunt took me to her work and I referred to everyone there by the names of the Seven Dwarves the whole time.

And, I apologize in advance if this offends anybody, but there was this one time when my dad took me to Sears with him, and while he was waiting in the checkout line, I wandered over to one of those light-up nativity displays (this happened around Christmas, I think), went over to the Baby Jesus in his manger, unplugged him, and cradled him in my arms as I went to find my dad to ask if he would buy it for me. Somehow I ended up in the Automotive Needs section, and someone standing behind my dad in line asked him, "Sir, is that your daughter?"

I think that was the Christmas that my parents got me an actual baby doll so I wouldn't do things like that anymore.

That's adorable! I used to get fascinated by the shiny streamers on the air conditioners at Sears. I always begged my mom to buy some shiny streamers for our air conditioner at home.

Once ran around with my diaper on my head...
Entered the "office" at home while my sister was there. Then I urinated in the door..
Worn a female bathsuit once..
Sings songs loudly without noticing
I sneeze really loud..

As a young teenager it was decided that I should go to this drama class after school. I ended up involved in a Durham university theatre production (I had one line). A lot of time was spent backstage with the uni students and I thought I should try to make friends so, doing what came naturally, I drew pencil portraits of cast members ...in the form of personified household objects. I remember drawing a picture of one girl as a smiling light switch. I think they all took it in the spirit it was intended but i shudder thinking back to how odd I was at times. It never occurred to me at the time that this was even a little bit strange or inappropriate - I didn't even know these people.

I burst into laughter when I read your story. I'll go as far as saying that your solution was a lot smarter and sneakier than mine.

I did something very similar when I was little; I was a little older than 2. My memory of this story is kind of vague, so much of is reconstructed from my parents' stories. They started potty-training me around that age, and they scolded me a little for wetting the bed. But they worded it strangely: "don't pee in bed". I still slept in a crib, though. So when I woke up from my nap, I had to go to the bathroom real bad. But I was afraid to climb out of the crib, because I might fall on the floor. So I stood up in my crib, dropped trou, and started urinating "overboard". My parents heard a noise, and ran into the bedroom:
"What are you doing!?" (slightly yelling, highly surprised)
"Peeing." (innocent, matter-of-fact tone)
They forgot all about the yelling, and started laughing uproariously. Years and years passed, and they never let me forget that one.

In my aspie fashion, I totally misinterpreted their statement; I thought it meant "don't pee in bed". As in, it was bad to pee while lying in my bed (crib). Nothing was said about peeing from the bed. So I did. They solved the problem by keeping a plastic cup, resembling those used for urinalysis tests, at the foot of my crib, and I was required to use it if I couldn't climb out. It worked very well, until I moved to a regular "big boy" bed and could just walk to the bathroom.

Apparently(my parents told me this) one of my first words was "Shuriken" Or the easier swedish version of the word anyway. I said it as I threw a paper at a guy in church.

Too many I am so ashamed of. I don't like those about myself.

Here is one of them I don't feel ashamed about:

I used to put a Pull Up on occasionally on and pee in it because I enjoyed the feeling and it was before I got into diapers. But then I would take it off a few minutes later because I didn't like the feeling long of being wet. I only liked wetting in them, not being wet. I also used to take my mother's pads when I was seven and put it on and masturbate in them and I once tore one apart and threw it on the hallway floor.

I also used to masturbate in public in my stroller and I would do it next to my mom and dad's bed in their bedroom, I also remember doing it in the middle of the night in the summer of 1991 and my cousin woke up next to me asking what am I doing. I also did it in the family room and mom would tell me to go do it in my own bedroom. She caught me doing it in bed for the next ten years or so until she stopped walking in without knocking. Since lot of people do it, this isn't so embarrassing anymore.

I used to give my two Barbie dolls golden showers and I also liked peeing in the playhouse because it made me feel excited and give me this feeling in my tummy. I once peed on my baby brother too while we were taking a bath. I was four then or five and it only happened once I remember.

I can't think of a specific "moment" at the...er...moment, but I was reminded of this earlier...

When the narrator for commercials advertising "as see on TV" products said, "here's how to order," I always thought that "How To Order" was the name of the guy who would give the instructions on how to order the product being advertised.