Might I be in hell, 'symbolically'?

Post Reply New Topic

So... before anyone moved this to a sub-forum it's about the spectrum due to its relation to noise sensitivity and its miraculous constant in my life, somehow...

Okay, so... don't all myths and legends claim 'hell' is filled with screams and brimstone etc...? Now, I've grown up with a mother who absolutely loved screaming as loud as possible and often, of course, wake me up horribly due to this... and it wasn't even anything to do with me, usually screaming for my sister to wake up to go to school, but she didn't seem to be at all sensitive to such noise... there we go, recipe for hell... but that is nothing...

I move away... whole countries... and where do I end up?

Oh, shall I pinpoint exactly how absolutely insane society is by highlighting the fact that a mental hospital I visited once... no one ever screamed, likely due to sedatives circulating in their systems, so... anyway, no, the screams are all outside, so... which part of the world is insane truly, again?

I move as far away from my parents as possible... and I goddamn get the same exact thing happening! This time with random people... like, life, universe, please give me a chance?

So... am I in hell? I was able to combat the random rude awakenings by simply using analogue radio in its 'noise' sections (ironic, noise combating noise), so I have static protecting me always effectively, happily haven't been woken up for a long time now... but I could still if one of the neighbours... oh, did I mention, my parents banged doors too... and, yes, you can imagine what my neighbours do. But, it can be unintentional too, because some sadistic architect made them automatically close unless manually stopped and when that happens they bang... but considering my neighbours seem to hate me I wouldn't get it past them that they do it on purpose... but, oh, I'm the "noisy" one? What, like, the music I can only play to combat their original noise, and often music too? WTF do they expect me to do, joyfully lap up all their nonsense?

Anyway, a bit of a diversion upon the other component that makes my life hell... but, in legends it is specifically 'screams' that are involved in the domain of demons, correct?

And, who can scream more than even middle-aged women? Why, children of course, even if they're in no physical danger or otherwise aren't being chased by wolves or something, as if humans themselves haven't hunted them to near-extinction...

I just can't bear it, sometimes... this perpetual hell, screams and door bangings follow me everywhere. It's, like, I could set up residence in some ethereal existence plopped on a cloud and I swear someone will find an excuse to install doors just to bang them and others the need to destroy their vocal cords for no apparent reason...

But... are they ever truly destroyed? When I even talk for about three hours I'm already hoarse... if I try to 'sing' something metal-like, it barely takes half an hour... these children can scream like it's their job destined from when they descended upon this world to specifically land in front of my flat and blow my eardrums out... I, just... I can hate my life, right? No?

But, seriously... not like I'm into the occult seriously, a passing academic interest at best... I watch 'horror' and at best it's 'entertainment', at worst some idiot's wrong definition confusing real horror with mere gore, which is really only a spectacle. No, real horror is like Jacob's Ladder. But, I diverge once again...

Could it be, though, that like in that film I am just not aware of an actual reality and I might be in hell with demons disguised as children frolicking joyfully that somehow find a need... somehow, to scream. Like, I don't understand, are they emulating being chased by actual danger? Training the vocal cords for such a situation? But... why in front of my life?

Or, it might be a matrix disguised reality... although, it's surely not doing a great job as it's traditionally supposed to keep people happy and not lead them to conclude that they're in hell. Like, it would make more sense if someone like screamed, it would coincide with their appearance, right? But, why must nature have 'programmed' innocent-looking... uh, 'midgets'... hey, they woke me up countless times before, the least I can do is take my frustration out by using a single word, not like I'll magically recover all my lost hours...

So... truly, am I but not aware of this worldly appearance masquerading as the underworld? Or... perhaps, yep, this world was hell after all... come on, history is surely some indicator...

Well can you move somewhere else? Perhaps you could find something a little quieter.

The last apartment I lived in was pretty hellish, it was very small with a sliding glass door going to a little back patio surrounded by a yard. And the neighbors upstairs where the worst they'd be loudly blaring music quite a few times. And the parents just let their kids run around like maniacs. They'd be banging around and screaming through the halls, then hang around right outside that sliding glass door and scream they even broke a windows in the building.

One of the kids was a horrible teenager and she broke my boyfriends car window, she was being all passive aggressive because we wouldn't give her cigarettes. We couldn't prove it though. But yeah I felt like I was going crazy in that place.

Literally the only option was to move.

As for noises waking you up at night, I think some people use ear plugs, but I can understand why that would not be an ideal solution.

But yeah its very unlikely that you're in hell...of course I guess none of us can know with 100% certainty if they are in hell or not I suppose.