Choosing to go Semi Verbal

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I’ve been working hard these past several months in both equine and traditional therapy to be more accepting of myself, and to learn how to live successfully in a way that works well for me. In that vein, I am trying out going deliberately semi-verbal, because even though I can speak, it takes a lot of energy both physically and emotionally for me to do so. I’ve been spending more and more time hiding in my room as time has gone by, avoiding people because I always felt pressured to talk to them and I didn’t want to.

As I write this, I’m sitting next to my roommate and feeling completely calm and relaxed, because I told him I didn’t want to speak right now but could use AAC, and he’s being amazing. He’s just sitting there playing his video game, sometimes making amusing comments about it, but not asking questions or pressuring me to talk, and not treating me any differently because I’m not talking.

I’m going to continue trying this out in different areas of my life, in group, at therapy, etc., allowing myself to talk or use AAC as I please depending on what feels most comfortable in the moment.

Have any of you tried this? What was it like?

I didn't know anything about AAC until you caused me to Google it. I don't really think I could do this but I can learn from it anyway. Most communication is nonverbal anyway, unless we're talking about engineering, science or math.

I've certainly tried shutting up until I find out what someone wants to talk about with me, that's tried & true however.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

I've considered it, but I don't want to purchase AAC because I would be supporting whatever sweatshop(s) the devices are almost certainly manufactured in.

Anyways, it wouldn't work well in my situation because the people I want to talk to the least are people I don't know—precisely the people who are most likely to be weirded out and unaccepting of my not talking.

Oh I thought you just meant gestural communication & so on.

_________________
"Standing on a well-chilled cinder, we see the fading of the suns, and try to recall the vanished brilliance of the origin of the worlds."
-Georges Lemaitre
"I fly through hyperspace, in my green computer interface"
-Gem Tos

What AAC device do you have? I have an iPad.

I have had difficulty speaking before, physically and emotionally. It never lasts longer than a few hours, but I'm familiar enough with it to understand why you're making this choice. No one should have the burden of speaking through that awful molasses feeling if there are alternatives. I can't give you any advice, but I wish you luck and hope that it makes things easier for you.

Thanks AceofPens, that's nice to hear. Your molasses metaphor is exactly accurate. One of my therapists pointed out the other day that I hold my breath while trying to find the right words to complete my sentences. I'll just stand there not breathing for twenty, maybe thirty seconds at a time.

Livingwithautism, I use an iPad too. It has an app called Coughdrop on it (which is also available on android, if anyone's interested). I can edit the buttons and change the voice, etc. but most often I use the QWERTY keyboard and predictive text. I'm learning how to condense my sentences to make them shorter, more concise, and faster to type. I find that the simplified language style suits me, and I'm amazed at how much I can communicated with single words and short two or three-word phrases.

None for me, thanks. I find speech communication difficult in the best of times, but it's been my experience that when I avoid speaking, it makes speech progressively more difficult for me to engage in when appropriate, which results in more avoidant behavior on my part, which makes speech even more difficult, ad infinitum, until I can barely bring myself to converse at all. That's not a direction I choose to go in.

I'm highly verbal except when I can't speak at all. There are usually no thoughts to communicate, my mind is a blank slate. In the middle of a job interview or something. Since I retired, I don't have to be 'normal' so I just let it happen and don't worry about it.

I saw my therapist today and brought my iPad. I told her about my plan to use AAC part time to conserve my social energy, and she said it was a “genius idea.” That gives me a lot of confidence to keep going with it. It’s already done a lot for my stress levels and I feel so much more true to myself when writing to communicate.

My therapist recommended getting one of those electronic “boogie boards” which are essentially whiteboards that work like a touch screen and can be erased with the touch of a button. She suggested using it for interactions in groups or with people who wouldn’t be patient enough to wait for me to type, since it is pretty slow. I’m going to pick one up from my local Barnes and Noble later today. I’m really excited, I finally feel like I’m truly making my life my own, rather than trying to twist myself to fit everyone else’s rules and expectations.

I went to social skills group today with my new pink boogie board, it was fantastic. The group leaders didn't bat an eye and all I had to do was write my responses and give the board to them. It cut out the anxiety of trying to figure out when I could jump in to the conversation and I contributed more to this group than I ever have before. I feel amazing and I'm so excited to go to speech therapy this afternoon and try it out there.