Autistic and ambitious

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Some things are harder for me than typical people. I refuse to temper my ambitions because of this.

I'm diagnostically mild, so obviously that skews my view of what I can and cannot accomplish, but it feels like too many people let their difficulties beat them instead of figuring out how to overcome them.

I certainly have problems that I haven't overcome, but I will try my damndest to overcome them, and I won't stop trying until I win or die (of old age, or accidental death I will never self-harm).

Who else feels like they can overcome their struggles?

Not particularly

Too far gone

No hope

Beyond repair


Graceful degradation




Not without $$$ drugs, and therapy

Invention, laws

Science fiction

Innovation


Brain transplant

No job, no friends

Could get them, but fired or dumped

The key is to let your strengths overcome your weaknesses and then to recognize and take advantages of opportunities when they magically appear out of nowhere.

I have a similar view to you.

All my heroes recommended getting a business partner. My strength is doing the work of ten engineers, but my weakness is doing the management at a snail's pace, and even if I just do the work of one engineer, the manager is still too slow to stay employed.

I consider myself fairly ambitious, but I need to exercise discretion. I was probably far more ambitious when I was younger. I am not a slouch by any means, as I am pretty active in a number of different things.

I've always felt that I'd overcome any struggle and would find some degree of success. Growing up, I was always considered extremely smart, even at certain times when my grades fell behind the norm. Being considered that smart, my parents were certain that I was destined for success. As the saying goes, failure was not an option for me. Mom and Dad did their job there, and for that I was fortunate.

Was I born ambitious? If ambitious is defined as knowing what you want to be when you grow up, then no, I was not ambitious, and wasn't ambitious until well into my adulthood. I wasn't ever really sure what I wanted to do in my life, so in place of a true career direction, I just did the things your average smart person was supposed to do -- get good grades, go to college, don't do anything society considers unwise, and try to live a life a little better than the average person. The problem for me was that my path had to include A LOT of masking to get by and achieve what my family and all the NTs around me considered "success." After over 20 years in the financial services industry, I flamed out and quit with no other job or career to fall back on. 3 years after quitting, I was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, at which point my previous life experiences began to make more sense.

I didn't discover a true career calling until my mid-40s when I started my gardening/horticulture career. Today at age 49, I'm as ambitious as I've ever been, planning to design and plant gardens and flowerpots over the next few weeks. I was lucky to be able to turn one of my special interests (gardening) into a career, but aside from luck I had to put forth a lot of effort to find that first gardening job, and then worked hard every day to become an employee that earned the trust and respect of my bosses. I've never lost the "failure is not an option" way of thinking, perhaps sometimes out of personal pride, while at other times, it's more because I want to have enough money to pay bills and afford to live in my house

Failure may not be an option but it is going to happen anyway because we are human.

In order to not consistently fail I think it is important that you define success. That definition has to suit you, play to your strengths and values not everybody else's.

I think too many consistently fail because they do not have a realistic definition of success and an unrealistic way of getting there. Specifically, the widespread American mentality of "if you try hard enough you can do ANYTHING". With that mentality any failure is logically judged as a matter of lazyness. That leads to trying harder and harder without thinking of what one is doing. The person in this negative thought loop increasingly thinks he or she is a bum. That means doubling and tripling down, to the point of ignoring enjoyment, and basic needs such as eating and sleeping because as a bum these are things one does not deserve. Been there, done that.

I don't wish to further sidetrack the thread topic of "Autistic and ambitious," but I should refine my earlier statement of "failure was not an option."

I have failed in numerous situations, and I'll fail in many more situations before I die, but failures can always be offset and overcome by successes with other things. It's more accurate to say that I believed failure was not a possibility as the theme of my life because I'd figure out ways to make my life a success. Not sure exactly how, but I was sure I'd figure it out whenever I needed to. I still believe that. Perhaps that's naive, or maybe even arrogant, but I'm glad I've kept that outlook

Back on topic....at this moment, I am both autistic and ambitious And I believe being ambitious makes it easier to rebound from failures.

There's a difference between being ambitious and impractical. The lowest functioning among us here on WP can be extremely ambitious in terms of the relative difficulty of the things we hope to achieve. I only want to go to college and live a semi-normal life independently by the time I'm 25. Given the severity of my traits at this moment in time, those goals are quite ambitious. But if I declared that I wanted to be a CEO in spite of my traits, that wouldn't be ambition. It would be a delusion. And that isn't letting my disability "beat" me, it's facing facts. Everyone with autism is limited in some definite way. If you have autism, there are some things you will never be able to do. If that includes some things that you want to do, it sucks, but we all have to learn to compromise in life. It's unhealthy to refuse to acknowledge limitations.

It took a few years, but I've finally accepted that I'm now wealthy enough for my needs.

I still work, for social interaction and something to do, but I think my coworkers also know that.

These days I cook tasty meals for myself and putter around in the garden every day, weather permitting.

Success has a brief, small positive impact

Failure has a large, long term negative impact

Emotional resilience ran out a long time ago

Racism sexism homophobia fatophobia classism lookism ableism

"Life" ain't fair

"Life" is not even ,"life"



Because I know that plenty of times, someone and I did the same thing, and they got a much more favorable result


It could be because I am autistic and no friends or $$$. So idiots are biased against me

But it could be any reason or no reason



No controlled experiment




It's so hard to define a justified goal


It's like, whooptie do

My truest and consistent ambition is to surpass self.

But how does one surpass self if one's own self -- in mind, in body, and maybe in soul, isn't very predictable nor far from linear?
I'm not only talking about moods here. I'm talking about my internal factors and outcome of external interactions.
I would like to fix this. A fight for myself, before 'giving up' so to speak.


One moment, I can afford ambition and/or indulge it as I would.
Because at those times, I'm competent or reliable, fast or patient, certain or decisive, learn at a certain pace or at least could truly keep up, confident or reckless, etc.

Then the next? I couldn't and/or I wouldn't. Suddenly or gradually not having whatever's writen above.
Even if I have the best of all things in terms of capacity, that doesn't mean I'm constantly just as ambitious.
Sometimes this annoys or frustrates me, sometimes I bear the whole thing with a laugh or a sad sigh, sometimes the question or even a thought of of ambition meant nothing or negative.

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By all means, be as ambitious as you want, but keep your eyes on your own paper. It's not for you to determine whether what other people achieve is enough, or whether they have "let their difficulties beat them." Basic respect requires that you trust them to ask themselves those questions and act on their conclusions.

For my part, my response to my limitations was always to work harder, but in my early 20s, I found that as mental and physical health problems pile up, it becomes possible to push yourself hard enough to do yourself permanent damage. You may want to watch out for that.