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Being addressed as 'him' or 'she' instead of by first name.

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JustFoundHere
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10 Sep 2019, 7:18 pm

It's not just the jerks who address people in their presence as 'he' 'him' or 'she' instead of first names. Alot of otherwise seemingly thoughtful people might also tend to not address people by their first names.



AnneOleson
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10 Sep 2019, 9:04 pm

Some people don’t like strangers calling them by their first name.



Dan82
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10 Sep 2019, 10:38 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
It's not just the jerks who address people in their presence as 'he' 'him' or 'she' instead of first names. Alot of otherwise seemingly thoughtful people might also tend to not address people by their first names.

This sounds like an idiosyncratic, autistic, rule-based social judgment to me. Probably best to let it go as it probably causes more harm than good.


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Mona Pereth
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12 Sep 2019, 7:38 pm

JustFoundHere wrote:
It's not just the jerks who address people in their presence as 'he' 'him' or 'she' instead of first names. Alot of otherwise seemingly thoughtful people might also tend to not address people by their first names.

Some of them might just have difficulty remembering names. A lot of autistic people, myself included, have difficulty remembering names.


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BTDT
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12 Sep 2019, 7:40 pm

Remembering names is really hard if you have face blindness. A lot of people on the spectrum have this issue.



kokopelli
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12 Sep 2019, 8:40 pm

BTDT wrote:
Remembering names is really hard if you have face blindness. A lot of people on the spectrum have this issue.


That's very true. It is quite rare for me to use someone's name in their presence and much of that is because I get it wrong so often.



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13 Sep 2019, 7:50 pm

I feel weird and uncomfortable every time I have to say someone's name directly to them, or when someone says my name directly to me. It feels too strong. Too dominating.

Exceptions are when someone is using it to get my attention. I also do like knowing that someone has taken the time to learn my name.