Do you ever worry you're just "making it fit"?

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Do you ever worry that you're actually not autistic and you've just made it fit so that you had something to explain your struggles? I do, quite often.

I worry that I'm acting or "playing it up" to try explain away my weirdness or my inability to be social and on some level use it as some kind of excuse.

I think it's called "imposter syndrome" or something. Anyone else feel similarly?

Not I.

The mental-health professionals that diagnosed me were appropriately trained and licensed.

Their diagnoses explained much more in 30 minutes than the previous 50+ years of guessing and worrying ever did.

I trust them.

No. I actually live in hope that I've been misdiagnosed all this time and that I'm just living with my co-morbids and/or some other disorder. But it's unlikely that's the case, because there are people less affected than me who are being diagnosed with it.

I've had this diagnosis for 20+ years and I'm still beating myself up about having it.

I as well as you I also have doubts, but I don't think it's an excuse. If something acts unconscious it means it is part of your presence. I recommend observing very lightly

No. I was diagnosed as a child after a lot of research by professionals before I even knew what autism was. And if it somehow turned out that I'm not autistic, well, their shame, not mine.

Any time I might wonder if I'm actually autistic, I just need to remember that I was diagnosed as a kid, before I'd ever even heard the terms "autism" or "Asperger's" before. But I do wonder sometimes if I'm actually as autistic as I think I am or if I'm subconsciously playing it up to make it fit me better.

So far it's the only "fit" I've ever found, and has explained so many things about my life that never made sense before. Maybe someday I'll find an even better explanation, but until then, I'm not worried about it.

I think a good assessor , via questioning , and observation ,would be able to see whether you're 'Just making it fit '.

That's the more sensible side of me talking . The less secure side of me thinks "They say I have Asperger's , but I seem to be a little different from A,B and C who post here "

Yes. I can act fairly normal (I performed professionally in my youth). People are often surprised when I deflate. So I ask myself, "why not just keep acting :normal" and then I would BE that". Couldn't I find a way to hold that up? Some secret trick. Then that would be me. Except it's not. And I can only hold it up under the most auspicious circumstances, as soon as there is a medium degree (or combined small degrees) of stress, I'm done for. Plus the "real" me is much more fun (an NT would say childish, but what do they know?)

I asked my assessor if I could "be myself" and he said yes, so I looked all around, fidgeted, bounced - just like I would WANT to do, I did refrain from asking a million questions, b/c I didn't want to "overdo" it. Really that was the first time I've been real with someone other than my husband and BFF ---- and it occurred to me I was "making it up" --- but no, it feels so good and natural ---- I plan to do it more! (next test: my family)

While I have the same angle view on my own case in more ways than one, it's the least of my worries and always had been.


I've been doing a lot of inner work for most of my life. And I'd still continue deeper...
The professionals, advocates, other references that gives definition and contexts only names for things I had found.


In more ways than one; my clueless phases was cut short to be honest, but I'd rather be grateful about it.
I've been in the denial phases in various angles from arrogance to rational justifications.
I've been in a clinging and coping phases, where there's just as arrogance and rational justifications under the pretense of acceptance.

I've been in a phases where most 'features' of autistic experience becomes questionable...

Mainly because I lack the comorbidity.
Maybe also because I lack the relatable circumstances and reactions that most aspies here apparently experienced and did otherwise yet I'm not any less guilty of doing and having the same back then.
I just keep moving on from the majority of the relatable circumstances and reactions, instead of staying with the same thing and to stay related for the sake of it.



More so when I already reached to a point of questioning, beyond the dimensions of intellect and the idea of; what humans and with everything as everyone is.
But I'm not diving there because that would be like studying the origins of autism that leads to studying of the entire humanity.

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I was actually thinking about this topic today and started to wonder: if autism means a mental disorder that shows X symptoms, and I display X symptoms due to a mental disorder, then I am autistic.

So no questioning. If you're autistic...then you're autistic. It's what I call "crazy simple" logic.