Why do I constantly remember being bullied?

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Hello, I apologize if my English is not 100% perfect. I’m worried that I still remember bullying from High School; however, I think it was probably one of the worst bullying experiences one could have. I was bullied every day even for things I thought everyone did, in many cases without realizing it until it was too late. But I think the worst was they knew how I would react if I heard some things and changed the way they talked when they knew I was listening to them, so I believed they were helping me but in reality they just made me do things for laughs.
I want to avoid this situation from happening again but I remember what happened. Also, I ocassionaly get outbursts from this, because I felt nothing was done. Is this normal and what can I do?

Getting bullied is a very common experience. Not only as a child, at school, but also as an adult, in the work place, in romantic relationships, in business, in every day life, from neighbours, police men, lawyers, richer folk etc.

The reasons why people bully can be simple, such as simple childish lack of control of destructive emotions (such as jealousy, arrogance, sadism), but also can be behaviour that is learnt or copied from others who are bully them.

In some cases, kids don't really mean to bully. In some cases, the kids don't realise what damage they are causing.
In order cases, some really are nasty and sadistic.

In my experience, there are all sorts of types of bullies and all sorts of types of ways to bully people.
I would say that minor violence is actually quiet easy to overcome but the psychological bullying can have a life long impact on the fragile psyche, which may take many years of healing to overcome.

In some cases, such as in the island that i live. Bullies actually stalk their victims after they have left school, and keep on making sure their victims life is ruined. I have lived that. And If i were to let it get to me, i would perhaps top myself.

But that would let them win, and wouldn't do me any favours either.
So. I learnt to put my life in perspective and realise to a greater extent to try and make the most out of my life,
because i am not the douche bag for being bullied, even if the bullies are wealthy, popular, and have woman falling at their feet. What they have in reality is only material, and under the material all they have is dirt.

Where often those who are bullied, it is the opposite. All the bullies can see, is the dirt that they have thrown on you.
But underneath, you may very well be a diamond. So don't let the dirt bullies define who you are to yourself.
You need to learn to allow yourself to shine no matter what grime the beasts of this world throw at you.

Separate yourself from the beasts.
And let your self shine!

Welcome to WP

Your written English seems better than mine. I was also bullied a lot when I was in high school. My memories of the bulling are unpleasant to the point that I don't want to be out and walking alone between 2 and 3:30 in the afternoon, especially on a Friday.

Yes, your reaction is very normal. You are suffering from the trauma of abuse. You need to take care of yourself. As crazy as it sounds, it was not personal. You did nothing to deserve it. You happened to be in the wrong place with the wrong people.

As an NT I was bullied in both primary and lower highschool (I learned to deflect the attention which inflicted psychological pain up to middle school but was left alone in highschool). Your response is perfectly normal and it also took me a while to recover.

Three things I'll say to underline what's already been said
1. It's not your fault (s**t happens)
2. Nobody can't control their environment (bullies are everywhere)
3. it's ok to externalise your feelings

eventually when you are ready move on and focus your attention on things that are important to you, Remove these people from your current life. You have learned about NT behavior now move on and live your life and apply what you have learned to be happy.

Also, I thought maybe I should add that I’m afraid I happen to stumble upon one of the bullies or even a former schoolmate in the future, for example university, now that I probably enter next week. Somebody I went to school with will probably know me for being naïve or something. The whole school knew about my antics.

I’m also worried the same thing happens again and I don’t really know how to handle the situation. I don’t know if the University I’m planning to go to has something for students with AS or something. In any case, my psychologist said maybe he could accompany me for some time.

Usually, high school-type bullying doesn't happen in college. Students are adults now, and more likely to be arrested for bullying-type behavior.

Also, most of the time, bullies in high school grow out of it and become just regular idiots--or they might even mature and become better people.

If you get bullied in college, there is more recourse. And bullies are more likely to be expelled from college than expelled from high school. You can report the bullying to a dean, a campus cop, any number of people (depending on the college).

Please don't deny yourself the opportunity to start college because of the potential for bullying.

I was bullied all through school, from 1st to 12th grade.

Welcome. You probably have PTSD/trauma.

It's quite common with autistic people as we're basically walking targets for it. You're not alone though most people on here have experienced similar.

Had the same circumstances and story, yet...

Once upon a time, I could've relate.

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I was bullied in primary school its something you never forget.
I remember there was a girl who I thought was a friend and I told her that I was going to a special school instead of high school and then the whole school knew about it and I was picked on and bullied over it.

Primary School:
never bullied, bullied a few other kids tho, usual juvenile stuff, got into fights.

High School:
began to be bullied in high school (thank you asd), never really bullied anyone, as far as i can remeber. watched other kids mercilessly bullied tho, hallway ass kickings etc. only regret is now not knocking out bullies when had chance, letting them intimidate me. but, i was a loner kid, not wanting confrontation at the time.

Hello, so I have thought if some treatment was still possible for my situation because of this: I’m not sure my behavior socially was the cause of the problem, because of some impulsivity, and difficulty with rules. My parents expect me to be somewhat independent now and I still handle these situations poorly. At school I could do my homework fine but I often misunderstood instructions at first for example, or if I had to work in teams, I often was told to do only minor details.

Now, I was actually bullied in some way since elementary at least but I dind’t think of it until recently. My parents said I didn’t develop emotional intelligence normally, and that I wasn’t really aware of my surroundings until around age 16 or 17, and I still prefer to not think about it.